WTH!!?? Advertise or agree to do fetish and then bitch about it

I arranged for a lady to join me for a week at the beach. When I contacted her I told her what I like. And it's NOT vanilla sex!!! She agreed and I ended up sending her some money before our meet to cover some things. I was wary, but she showed up. So she gets here, and claims she's on her period for the first couple of days. So not much of anything happens. Then on Tuesday I take her to pick up some food, and she leaves her phone. Out of curiosity, I look and see that she has me listed as "REC1166Freak". Well, that sort of hurt my feelings. Came close to telling her to pack and go home. But I didn't. So anyway, We spend Wednesday having a fun time doing things. Go to a nice lunch. I swing by the bank and get the rest of the donation I owe her. Go back to the room and finally have real sex. Then she starts to wash a load of cloths. She mentions going to the store to pick up some advil or something since her leg had been hurting. After awhile I figure out she had split. Packed her few things, plus a bottle of perfume I had bought her, and a GPS I told her she could have. And split, at 8ish pm at night!!! No reason, no answering text or calls. Just gone. Gave thought to getting seriously even with her, but haven't done anything yet. Just would like to know why she left. We hadn't even done anything fetish yet!!!
Then I had another lady I was seeing. We would do some fetish. Then we had a falling out of a bit and she just wails on me about how she hates doing fetish, hates the guys that want fetish, we're all a bunch of freaks....on and on and on....... So let me tell you, her IOP is 1001%!!! Because I had NO IDEA she felt that way. So again, if you're going to advertise it, or agree to meet to provide fetish.....why bitch or be so hateful to us "non-vanilla" sex people?? Answer me that please!!!????

R14

Rec1166...your suppliers are in the business of taking money for your companionship. And since I don't see a "No" review in your list of reviews, you're not doing anyone any favors by not sharing your experience. In fact, you're encouraging that bad behavior from the provider that did it by letting it fly without being reported.


As for your fetish...you need to EXPLICITLY shop for women who advertise fetish/BDSM/S&M/etc. You're paying for companionship, and you have no legal recourse if you leave unsettled short of a bad review, which you aren't doing either.

Perspective: I'm very timid. I need women to take charge in our sessions. Despite laying this out VERY CLEARLY to several providers, in most of my sessions, (both reviewed and not) the provider ends up waiting for me to tell her what I want - which is a recipe for disaster because I'm too timid to tell a woman what I want.

So I screen more thoroughly now. There are a lot of providers that I would dearly love to spend time with, but I'm not willing to fork out $500-$2000 to be disappointed, and I'm not willing to risk disappointment without some reasonable assurance that I'm going to get what I want.

Do the same. Be more thorough, more selective, more picky - and if you're willing to pay a provider for a week, you have options outside of your local area. You can shop across the country. I've done it!

I do tell them when I first contact that I want fetish. Some say they only do vanilla, or they haven't done fetish, but are willing to try. The lady that took off on me, I told her what I wanted, and she agreed. But when she got here, she advised me that she had never done strapon or prostate massage. I told her no problem, we can work on it. Maybe that's what scared her and made her take off. Maybe she just intended on fucking me over on the money from the beginning. I don't know. But the second lady I mentioned, she advertised fetish. We had done fetish. I did a positive review on her, but she didn't like a few things I said in the review. Nothing negative, just didn't like it. Goes BALLISTIC on me, threatens me if I don't REMOVE the review. I was able to get the mods to let me edit the review. That calmed her down. But while going ballistic, she let me know what she REALLY thinks of the guys that she sees. That's why I said her IOP was 1001%

R14

I do tell them when I first contact that I want fetish. Some say they only do vanilla, or they haven't done fetish, but are willing to try. The lady that took off on me, I told her what I wanted, and she agreed. But when she got here, she advised me that she had never done strapon or prostate massage. I told her no problem, we can work on it. Maybe that's what scared her and made her take off. Maybe she just intended on fucking me over on the money from the beginning. I don't know. But the second lady I mentioned, she advertised fetish. We had done fetish. I did a positive review on her, but she didn't like a few things I said in the review. Nothing negative, just didn't like it. Goes BALLISTIC on me, threatens me if I don't REMOVE the review. I was able to get the mods to let me edit the review. That calmed her down. But while going ballistic, she let me know what she REALLY thinks of the guys that she sees. That's why I said her IOP was 1001%

R14 Originally Posted by Rec1166

Ah...consider then picking one of the providers on ECCIE who *like* that sort of thing, and either fly them in to see you or pay them a visit. I think YummyMarie in Houston enjoys that sort of thing, and River Song (also in Houston) did some wonderful things to me that you might enjoy.

If you think about it...if a 4 hour session is $1000 and a plane ticket is $400...

I just started on here but I advertise that I am fetsish friendly and that I do want to try and learn new fetishes.... In turn if there was something I didn't like I would tell the guy and make sure he knew that so I didn't waste his time or mine. Sorry she did you so dirty.

I just started on here but I advertise that I am fetsish friendly and that I do want to try and learn new fetishes.... In turn if there was something I didn't like I would tell the guy and make sure he knew that so I didn't waste his time or mine. Sorry she did you so dirty. Originally Posted by lindsey269

Thank you Lindsey269. If I were to make a trip back to Texas I would attempt to see you. Or if you ever decide to travel and come to the hell hole of Richmond, Va, let me know.
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If a lady doesn't advertise fetish, I ask. If they say no, then I decide if I still want to see them. If they say they'll try, I go from there. But where I live now, the pickings are few. Being close to DC, alot of these ladies have GPS. They think because DC has lots of money, us folks in Richmond should too. I've spent more on two hours of vanilla, than what I've spent at times for two hours of fetish threesome in Texas. I don't know. I sent her another text to ask that she let me know she's at least safe. And I asked her to explain why she took off. But mostly I just want to know that she's ok. I can always recover the expenditure of money. Though if I do this again in the future, I'll let them know they will get paid at the END of the week!!!!!

R14

Definitely. Did you find her on Eccie??? Well just pay daily if it gets to that point. And let others know what she did.

I do tell them when I first contact that I want fetish. Some say they only do vanilla, or they haven't done fetish, but are willing to try. The lady that took off on me, I told her what I wanted, and she agreed. But when she got here, she advised me that she had never done strapon or prostate massage. I told her no problem, we can work on it. Maybe that's what scared her and made her take off. Maybe she just intended on fucking me over on the money from the beginning. I don't know. But the second lady I mentioned, she advertised fetish. We had done fetish. I did a positive review on her, but she didn't like a few things I said in the review. Nothing negative, just didn't like it. Goes BALLISTIC on me, threatens me if I don't REMOVE the review. I was able to get the mods to let me edit the review. That calmed her down. But while going ballistic, she let me know what she REALLY thinks of the guys that she sees. That's why I said her IOP was 1001%

R14 Originally Posted by Rec1166

Jeez... your requests are actually fairly mild among the fetish gents. I can't imagine having an issue with strap on play or prostate massage... that's pretty "run of the mill" as far as fetishes go. How disappointing for you-- I'm sorry you've had a run of misfortune in your quest for your desires. Don't give up.. there are plenty of us who wouldn't feel you're out in left field.

Yes, I found her on ECCIE. Saw her about two years ago to the day from this past Sunday, 8/21. We had a short, 1hr, vanilla visit and I had a great time. But from the beginning this time wasn't nearly as fun. And I haven't changed that much. Still short, fat, and maybe more gray hair. But otherwise the same guy she saw two years ago.
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Yea, fetish wise I'm not that crazy. Some strapon, some prostate massage, hard nipple play, toe sucking, DATY/DATO, maybe some spanking. If you'll let me be rough with your nipples and/or spank you that's a plus. Anal is always nice, but if you're giving me good anal, I'm happy.

R14

Lol. Well all sounds good except anal. I haven't explored there yet, but just try a different provider next time ...

I'd suggest finding a well versed kink oriented companion who is aware of what types of play she likes to explore as well as her hard limits. Whenever the opportunity arises to indulge in some of my favorite types of BDSM dynamics I am always thrilled. Vanilla dates are also wonderful, but I'm especially grateful when I find a friend who is as eager to engage in certain kinky experiences as I am. The rare moments when I've found myself being resentful is when someone pushes my boundaries and disregards my hard limits. Outside of that, I'm very open to exploring a multitude of kinky desires.

It can be challenging figuring out what a particular provider may like as not all ladies like listing out acronyms and menu options. But if a provider advertises as "fetish friendly" it should be at least somewhat apparent via her adverts, website copy, posting history, or pictures what type of experience she offers. If someone advertises that they offer fetish experiences yet is ambiguous about what those experiences could look like, perhaps consider moving on.

I'd suggest finding a well versed kink oriented companion who is aware of what types of play she likes to explore as well as her hard limits. Whenever the opportunity arises to indulge in some of my favorite types of BDSM dynamics I am always thrilled. Vanilla dates are also wonderful, but I'm especially grateful when I find a friend who is as eager to engage in certain kinky experiences as I am. The rare moments when I've found myself being resentful is when someone pushes my boundaries and disregards my hard limits. Outside of that, I'm very open to exploring a multitude of kinky desires.

It can be challenging figuring out what a particular provider may like as not all ladies like listing out acronyms and menu options. But if a provider advertises as "fetish friendly" it should be at least somewhat apparent via her adverts, website copy, posting history, or pictures what type of experience she offers. If someone advertises that they offer fetish experiences yet is ambiguous about what those experiences could look like, perhaps consider moving on. Originally Posted by Lena Duvall

True Lena. I've never disregarded a persons limits. Might try to push them some, but if they say "red", or "mercy", or "yellow", everything stops and we work it out. Sometimes I just untie them, sometimes we stop playing for a few minutes. But to ignore their feelings and limits, therefore betray trust is not something you do.

R14

Why did you go through her phone?

Why did you go through her phone? Originally Posted by BBW Katrina

Well, I didn't "go through" her phone as in look at ALL of her contacts or texts or anything. I just wanted to see how she had me listed in her phone. Had a provider in Texas, I was standing beside her as she went through her text, and one the popped up said "MYNAMEFREAK". I asked if that was my name, and she said no and gave me some kind of story. So Just wanted to see how this lady had me listed. Again, it was "MYNAMEFREAK". And I've had two or three ladies on here say what I want fetish wise is fairly normal. So it sort of irritated me that she had listed it that way. But then again, she doesn't advertise as fetish. But she agreed to do fetish with me on this trip. But apparently she never planned on following through on that.

R14

I arranged for a lady to join me for a week at the beach. When I contacted her I told her what I like. And it's NOT vanilla sex!!! She agreed and I ended up sending her some money before our meet to cover some things. I was wary, but she showed up. So she gets here, and claims she's on her period for the first couple of days. So not much of anything happens. Then on Tuesday I take her to pick up some food, and she leaves her phone. Out of curiosity, I look and see that she has me listed as "REC1166Freak". Well, that sort of hurt my feelings. Came close to telling her to pack and go home. But I didn't. So anyway, We spend Wednesday having a fun time doing things. Go to a nice lunch. I swing by the bank and get the rest of the donation I owe her. Go back to the room and finally have real sex. Then she starts to wash a load of cloths. She mentions going to the store to pick up some advil or something since her leg had been hurting. After awhile I figure out she had split. Packed her few things, plus a bottle of perfume I had bought her, and a GPS I told her she could have. And split, at 8ish pm at night!!! No reason, no answering text or calls. Just gone. Gave thought to getting seriously even with her, but haven't done anything yet. Just would like to know why she left. We hadn't even done anything fetish yet!!!
Then I had another lady I was seeing. We would do some fetish. Then we had a falling out of a bit and she just wails on me about how she hates doing fetish, hates the guys that want fetish, we're all a bunch of freaks....on and on and on....... So let me tell you, her IOP is 1001%!!! Because I had NO IDEA she felt that way. So again, if you're going to advertise it, or agree to meet to provide fetish.....why bitch or be so hateful to us "non-vanilla" sex people?? Answer me that please!!!????

R14 Originally Posted by Rec1166

That was pretty mean. Sorry you had to go through that.