The Titanic and Bill Clinton - A Book Report

bbkid's Avatar
  • bbkid
  • 08-25-2010, 12:33 PM
One student turned in the following book report,
With the proposition that they were nearly identical stories!

His cool teacher gave him an A+ for this report.

Titanic:..... Cost - $29.99
Clinton :..... Cost - $29.99

Titanic:..... Over 3 hours to read
Clinton :... Over 3 hours to read

Titanic:..... The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.
Clinton :... The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.

Titanic:.... Jack is a starving artist.
Clinton :..... Bill is a bullshit artist.

Titanic:.... In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
Clinton :.... Ditto for Bill.

Titanic:..... During the ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
Clinton :..... Ditto for Monica.

Titanic:..... Jack teaches Rose to spit.
Clinton :... Let's not go there.

Titanic:.... Rose gets to keep her jewelry.
Clinton :..... Monica' s forced to return her gifts.

Titanic:..... Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.
Clinton :..... Clinton doesn't remember Jack.

Titanic:..... Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
Clinton :..... Monica.. ooh, let's not go there, either.

Titanic:..... Jack surrenders to an icy death.
Clinton :...... Bill goes home to Hillary - basically the same thing
Fancyinheels's Avatar
Cute. I've had this on my blog in a slightly longer version for a while now. Called it, "Book Report on Two Sinking Ships" and it's one of my more popular entries.

Here's another one from the Clinton era:

Last week a very important meeting took place among God, the Pope, and Moses. They were troubled because the President of the United States was behaving in an inappropriate manner and there were many people who saw nothing wrong in what he had done. They decided that the only course of action left was to create an 11th Commandment to get their message across.

Now, the problem remained exactly how to word this new commandment so that it matched the other commandments in style and holy inspiration. After great meditation and discussion they concluded:

"Thou shalt not comfort thy rod with thy staff."
abdclub's Avatar
Very good, Nichole!! Luv ya.

abdclub