Two men ran out to the course for a quick nine after work. They get to the tee and see two ladies playing ahead of them.
One of the men complains that the ladies will slow them down and says he is going to ask if they can play through. He goes halfway to the ladies and turns back.
The other man asked what was wrong. The man said, "I can't go up there that's my wife and my mistress."
So the other man says he will go. He goes halfway and comes back. His partner asked what happened and the man replied, "Small world, huh?"
- Alexis Love
- 12-08-2014, 11:52 AM
- Sir Hardin Thicke
- 12-08-2014, 02:23 PM
TFF!
- TerraFirma
- 12-08-2014, 10:03 PM
Love it!!!
- Art Vanderlay
- 12-09-2014, 06:27 AM
Golf Joke
A fellow has a week off from work and decides to play a round of golf every day.
First thing Monday morning, he sets off on his first round and soon catches up to the person in front. He sees that this is a woman and, as he catches up to her on a par 3, that, in fact, she's very attractive. He's interested and suggests that they play the rest of the round together.
She agrees and a very close match ensues. She turns out also to be a very talented golfer and she wins their little competition on the last hole. He congratulates her in the parking lot, then offers to give her a lift when he sees she doesn't have a car. All in all it's been a highly enjoyable morning.
On the way to her place, she thanks him for the morning's company and competition and says she hasn't enjoyed herself so much on the course for a long time. He pulls up to her house, they kiss and she shows him her appreciation.
The next morning he spies her at the first tee and suggests they play together again. He's actually quite competitive and slightly pissed that she beat him the previous day. Again they have a magnificent day, enjoying each others company and playing a tight competitive round of golf.
Again she beats him at the last hole, again he drives her home and again she shows her appreciation.
This goes on all week, with her beating him narrowly every day. This is a sore point for his male ego but, nevertheless, in the car home from their Friday afternoon round, he tells her that he has had such a fine week that he has a surprise planned: dinner for two at a fancy candle-lit restaurant followed by a night of passion in the penthouse apartment of a city hotel. Surprisingly, she bursts into tears and says she can't agree to this. He can't figure out what the fuss is about, but eventually she admits the reason.
"You see," she tearfully sobs, "I'm a transvestite."
He is aghast. He swerves violently off the road, pulls the car to a screeching halt and curses madly, overcome with emotion.
"I'm sorry," she repeats.
"You bastard," he screams, red in the face, "You cheating bastard. You've been playing off the women's tees all week!!"
A fellow has a week off from work and decides to play a round of golf every day.
First thing Monday morning, he sets off on his first round and soon catches up to the person in front. He sees that this is a woman and, as he catches up to her on a par 3, that, in fact, she's very attractive. He's interested and suggests that they play the rest of the round together.
She agrees and a very close match ensues. She turns out also to be a very talented golfer and she wins their little competition on the last hole. He congratulates her in the parking lot, then offers to give her a lift when he sees she doesn't have a car. All in all it's been a highly enjoyable morning.
On the way to her place, she thanks him for the morning's company and competition and says she hasn't enjoyed herself so much on the course for a long time. He pulls up to her house, they kiss and she shows him her appreciation.
The next morning he spies her at the first tee and suggests they play together again. He's actually quite competitive and slightly pissed that she beat him the previous day. Again they have a magnificent day, enjoying each others company and playing a tight competitive round of golf.
Again she beats him at the last hole, again he drives her home and again she shows her appreciation.
This goes on all week, with her beating him narrowly every day. This is a sore point for his male ego but, nevertheless, in the car home from their Friday afternoon round, he tells her that he has had such a fine week that he has a surprise planned: dinner for two at a fancy candle-lit restaurant followed by a night of passion in the penthouse apartment of a city hotel. Surprisingly, she bursts into tears and says she can't agree to this. He can't figure out what the fuss is about, but eventually she admits the reason.
"You see," she tearfully sobs, "I'm a transvestite."
He is aghast. He swerves violently off the road, pulls the car to a screeching halt and curses madly, overcome with emotion.
"I'm sorry," she repeats.
"You bastard," he screams, red in the face, "You cheating bastard. You've been playing off the women's tees all week!!"
- nuglet
- 12-09-2014, 11:37 AM
After a day of golfing with his best friend, the man arrives home and his wife said, "how was your game?".. He replies:"it was terrible, on the 3rd tee, a bolt of lightning struck Bob and killed him on the spot!".. She replies "Oh no!!! That's horrible!~~".. he said.. " no shit.. the whole rest of the course, it was ... hit the ball, drag Bob, hit the ball, drag Bob, I'm worn out!"
- Journal
- 12-09-2014, 12:22 PM
Lady gets stung by a bee while she is out on the golf course. She runs to the club house and tells the golf pro she needs some help as a bee stung her. He asks where and she she replies between the #1 hole and the #2 hole. He replies---I think your stance is too wide.
- ab1500
- 12-13-2014, 06:31 AM
Two guys golfing and a funeral procession drives by.. First guy turns and rather solemnly faces the procession as it passes. Second guy says "that was a nice gesture" First guy says "well, I was married to her for 42 years".
- SummerReign
- 12-20-2014, 10:39 PM
Who knew golf jokes were so enjoyable lol.