The NC/NS issue (generally speaking)

After some reading on a review's responses regarding NC/NS's....so without needs to troll, what would suffice to hobbyists as reason for a provider to have to cancel? Things do happen, things that arent learned about until it's too late to cancel sometimes i.e. car accident, getting pulled over, flight delays, etc..it could be a number of things on a provider's side that causes her to miss an appointment, but perhaps getting the full story first and then making a conclusion after knowing. But would you still be offended if it wasn't a nc/ns...she actually calls, texts, emails to cancel due to abcd? Yes, time was set aside for the meeting and the anticipation was growing and then something happens.

I have had clients who have nc/ns and from my end...it is very frustrating. You set your day around it, get ready, perhaps cancel other activities to accomodate and then...nothing. No communication happens. I'm left upset at what transpired bc it's TOO easy to just let someone know with all these different portals of communication to drop someone a quick line and let them it's not going to happen. Communication is key

With that said, every situation is different. If a provider doesnt make it or call but she has a stellar reputation, Im sure there is never malice intent or plain neglect on their part....maybe something beyond her control came about, but one doesnt know until you hear her side. And vice versa.

I happen to be so happy to be part of the West TX forum and the closeness everyone here shares.

So.......anyone??? Thoughts? Input?

Alright Ash, I'll weigh in on this one again; but only cause it's you and only cause you asked!

Speaking just for me, It's not really necessary for a lady to have a "good" excuse for a cancellation. It's not really necessary for me to have the "full story" There could be a hundred different reasons, some you mentioned. Sometimes shit just happens! What a guy is looking for is repeated reports of this happening. In any event the most important thing is the fact that the contact is made, the cancellation is confirmed. I would not be offended by her cancelling; on the contrary, I would (and have) have a great amount of respect for her rather than just leaving me hanging out there.

In my experience, the most-oft reason is the fact that the lady double-booked a particular time frame, almost banking on the fact that one of them wouldn't show up. Or the overlap between sessions is scheduled way too close. If a guy is 30 mins late getting to the incall and the lady didn't leave enough time between appts, the next guy is circling, calling with no answer and surmising a NCNS. (Your situation is quite different due to location and business practices, btw!)

One other reason that has happened before is that a "regular" called in the meantime. The lady would naturally want to take the virtually guaranteed appointment rather than take a chance that the noob (or guy that she doesn't like as well), won't show. She should cancel with the noob but for whatever reason doesn't. Same result as far as the other guy is concerned, NCNS.

I am well aware that clients will and do the same, NCNS. It's just as unacceptable. Some clients are just assholes and some Providers are just bitches, we all know that! In some areas, Provider NCNS's get so bad that the guy will set up a few different appointments with different providers. The Plan A/B/C scenario. He will work down the list until one of them can get him in. Provider B and C are left holding the proverbial bag if he doesn't call and cancel...a NCNS from the lady's point of view.

How do you fix it or prevent it? I have no idea! The advice I hear over and over is that clients have to deal with reputable providers, do their research. And Providers have to screen the clients. In general, I know that most providers see a lot of clients that do not come from this or other boards, probably more that don't than ones that do. They have to use other advertising venues out there, as the pool is just not that deep on ECCIE, USASG, P411, DC, etc.

I suppose it boils down to how rigid a lady's screening process is. The more references they require, the fewer clients will make it through. If the screening is more relaxed, the more flakes will show up (or not). It's a difficult tightrope we all walk, especially in these smaller markets. El Paso/Midland/Odessa/Lubbock/Amarillo is a whole different animal compared to Phoenix, Las Vegas, Los Angeles, Atlanta, Dallas, Miami, New York, etc as far as available numbers of Providers and Clients.

Thats a big reason why I love it out here so much!

I would just plead once again that we ALL get along here. There are just not that many of us to begin with in this huge land area we work and play in. The petty bullshit/snarky comments that are so casually thrown out there can have real consequences to the participation level in our little fraternity/sorority here. I don't want to see our group here turn into DFW-West, drama-rama! I can't imagine any of us do. A little respect for each other will go a looong way!

Again, everything I said is to taken in general terms and not directed at anyone in particular.

Ok, I am REALLY putting my soapbox away this time, there is way too much sex that needs to be had.

P.S. So, Ms Ashton, when are we gonna go golfing?

Personally as long as she informs me that's fine. Could be due to any reason - doesnt matter. She is sleeping,just tired or her BF came over -whatever-- the reason is not my concern and it should not be. Just informing that she has to cancel due to some unavoidable personal circumstances or incidents would be perfectly fine for me.

Reasons really aren't important.... as long as there is a call to say it ain't gonna happen then it's all good. Life happens.

It's all just a matter of respect and common courtesy. I'm glad to say I've never ncns'd anyone, and only have had to cancel twice in my hobby history for emergency situations. Both times I gave the ladies plenty of notice. Do your research and stay away from the girls who are known for ncns's or flaky behavior and you won't get bit much. If someone ncns's you give her a chance to explain and or rectify the situation. If she makes no attempt to make amends for standing you up, then post it here and share that information with the rest of us so we know to stay away from her.

On the flip side, I have only had 3 ladies ncns me ever...each time I made an effort to contact the ladies before I posted anything in public as I feel is also a matter of respect because you never know what may have happened on her side. I guess I'm batting .333 here...one gave me a kick-ass make-up session that I still haven't forgotten, the second promised a make-up session and then ncns'd again!, and the third I knew was a better than 50% chance she was gonna ncns anyway because she was known for that so I already had a plan b in place...no skin off my back since I kinda expected it anyway.

I also appreciate the girls who have to cancel and at least have the respect to let us know up front. If you have a good reason you wanna let us know about, thats fine, but I personally really don't care that much anymore (looking back on it...if I had a nickel for every time a lady's car broke down, had a flat, got stolen, or got repoed just before my session, or had a family member or pet get sick at the last minute, got thrown in jail or had to bail someone out of jail, or any of the other ones I've heard, I could hobby a lot more because I'd be a rich man). Bottom line...no matter whether she gave a reason or not...at least the lady was courteous and mature enough to let me know she was cancelling, and I appreciate that. Everyone gets one freebie from me...no harm, no foul, no hurt feelings, no questions asked...any more than that is flaky and I'm probably callin bullshit.

Thanks for your post, Ashley. If everyone was as rock solid and dependable as you, then we wouldn't need these threads! However, as it stands, it's good to have a thoughtful discussion about these kinds of things every once in a while to keep it fresh on our minds. All the west texas ladies and gents seem to be doing an excellent job...maybe that's why we have so much fun out here!!

Reasons really aren't important.... as long as there is a call to say it ain't gonna happen then it's all good. Life happens. Originally Posted by Lothar

Ditto that.

I don't care about the why. Just tell me you're not going to be able to make it, and the sooner you tell me the better.

I don't need an explanation. If you want to supply an explanation, that's fine, but you don't owe me an explanation.

The key point here is this:

if you call and let me know that you're canceling, I'll appreciate that, and I'll probably attempt another appointment in the future. However, if you NS/NC, then I'm probably not calling you again, and I'll probably tell people about it.

Do that enough and it's going to kill your bottom line.

All the west texas ladies and gents seem to be doing an excellent job...maybe that's why we have so much fun out here!!

yessss!!

D!!! I miss you!!

P.S. So, Ms Ashton, when are we gonna go golfing? Originally Posted by Chica Chaser

Just got my new handicap card...Im officially a 10 , so whenever you're ready..let me know, Mr. CC

Just got my new handicap card...Im officially a 10 , so whenever you're ready..let me know, Mr. CC Originally Posted by AshleyAshton

Oh Shit! I heard you were good but didn't know you were a 10. OK, so it looks like I'm going to embarrass myself. Perhaps you can give me some lessons...golf lessons!

Thanks for your post, Ashley. If everyone was as rock solid and dependable as you, then we wouldn't need these threads! However, as it stands, it's good to have a thoughtful discussion about these kinds of things every once in a while to keep it fresh on our minds. All the west texas ladies and gents seem to be doing an excellent job...maybe that's why we have so much fun out here!! Originally Posted by lionheart

Thanks, handsome!! I enjoy reading your input!! And thank you for giving me a new word to use >>fucktard<<...lol, LOVE it!!

xoxoxo

I also don't need an explanation as to why a provider can't make it but just have the professional courtesy to cancel so that I'm not waiting around wasting my time. Many a time providers have nc/ns and smetimes I hear back hours later or not a all, so now I've learned to have Plan A and Plan B just in case

I tend to be pretty brutal on this issue. Just a rule but that rule has served me well. If a provider cancels on me that will be the last time I book. Too slow responding to my emails, same thing.

There is always an excuse to be made so I am not really interested in excuses because that is what they are.

If one looks at the issue logically, invariably the "emergency" could have and should have been avoided. Are there some things that come up that the person has no control over? Sure. But those events are very, very rare. Normally, that comes with a quick phone call to explain in detail what happened. That is OK. Your gut will always lead you the right way. The problem is that most people don't follow their own instincts and make the same mistake again and again.

Anyway, my two cents

I don't need an explanation either. And i don't mean that in a cold way. I mean it's not really any of my business and I am sure that MY problems are not really something you need to hear. Just text, call, IM, email, do something as soon as you can to say "can't make it" . That way I don't have to find myself sitting in a car phoning, knocking on a door wondering, or just wasting time that I might now have to do something else.

Ok I really want the ladies input on this one.
A few weeks ago I post a come visit west Texas ad on ECCIE San Antonio. I am sure a lot of you saw it...it worked also! A lady I have tried to see in the past PM's me saying she was in San Antonio but was thinking about a tour through Midland. Great I jumped on that one immediatley. I confirmed the date through an appointment request on P411, that was on a Wednesday. Our appointment was to be Monday Morning 11:00 AM. I confirmed via EM on Friday...we are on. She said she would email me early Monday morning of where, and give me directions....Fine.

Monday morning I get up thinking about her , and that we were finally going to see each other, I am really excited. Around 9:30 she em's me saying she had security issues, and cancelled. We email back and forth, and set another appointment for Tuesday morning.

Monday night just after midnight she em's me again saying something came up and she would have to postpone our date again...not that she owes me an explanation, but she damn sure did not offer one either, and did not offer to try and re-schedule.

Now I am really kind of pissed, I am the reason she came out here anyway. Later Tuesday evening she em's me and asks if I still want to see her? Now I really have to think about it...she is supposed to be incredible at her proffession, and I must admit she is very, very attractive, and has a perfect 96 score you know 36 24 36.

OK I email her saying yes, and I say my Wednesday is open, what would fit her schedule. This time she em's me right back and says she would be leaving around noon on Wednesday, and asked if I wanted some early morning delight around 9AM. I em back and say yes, but lets make it two hours. Another email and we have a date. Now I am thinking I might actaully see her.

I think about it all night telling myself not to get worked up that she will probably cancel again.

You will never guess...yep...around 5:30 AM Wednesday she em's me and cancels for the 3rd time. Then she has the audacity to say she wants to see me on her next trip to West Texas.

Now this woman, (I did not say lady this time) is highly rated on P411, and has lots of reviews. Yes, she is even on ECCIE, and I am relatively sure she will read this and know exactly who I am talking about.

What would you do...Write a bad review, or write a warning. At the present time I have done nothing about it but get mad at myself for allowing it to go as long as it did!

Your input is certainly requested. These are the FACTS LADIES, NOTHING MORE THAN HOW THE ACTUAL EVENTS TOOK PLACE. YOU WILL NOTICE THE NAMES OF ALL CONCERNED HAVE BEEN HIDDEN UNTIL THE JURY IS OUT!