Funny,Crazy, Sad stuff heard in the hobby

Ladies and Gents,

What are some of the funniest, craziest or saddest lines you have heard in the hobby?

Lets make this a fun and entertaining thread.

I think the funniest, that I have heard from this white provider off of The Pitch personal ads, when I first started: She said man your the biggest white dude I have been with, you fill me up (talking about my third leg)

So ladies and gents lets have some fun and see who can come up with the funniest, craziest or saddest line in the hobby. Whether it be while on a date, setting up a date etc.

Grizzly,
Don't you think it is just a little bit to soon for you to be asking what funny, crazy and sad stuff we have heard in the hobby.

Just Saying

I was proposed to by a client several years ago. It was our FIRST appointment together.... And it was not just a funny haha lets get married.. he was dead serious and it was weird. lol

I was proposed to by a client several years ago. It was our FIRST appointment together.... And it was not just a funny haha lets get married.. he was dead serious and it was weird. lol Originally Posted by DestinyInKC

I am dealing with a guy like that now. He wants to be my boyfriend and I mean boyfriend FOR REAL!! lol. It's frustrating to reiterate to him over and over again that this is my business. I sound like a broken record, seriously! He is even divorcing his wife in hopes that I will change my mind. I get such a headache dealing with him. ugghhhh....

One lady told me "oh you get up for round 2 so fast, a lot of old men would love to be you"

ever since that meeting I've been having trouble with the second pop lol.

I am dealing with a guy like that now. He wants to be my boyfriend and I mean boyfriend FOR REAL!! lol. It's frustrating to reiterate to him over and over again that this is my business. I sound like a broken record, seriously! He is even divorcing his wife in hopes that I will change my mind. I get such a headache dealing with him. ugghhhh.... Originally Posted by Gemma34

Do I have to give up the hobby when you say yes??

Back in Craigs list days I had A last minute cancel On a dinner date with the line "Cops have to eat also" Seems like there would be better ways to gather low hanging fruit than feeding them first lol.

When I say yes?? LOL! Now that is funny crazy stuff right there. .

"I have a script prepared. How fast can you memorize?" I was handed a 20 page script that included his and my own lines for the evening.

"Like you know anything, your just a hooker." In regards to discussing the possibility or impossibility of time travel. He was dead serious.

"You are all just hookers, If you could be anything else you wouldn't be here." Ex madam at a ranch in Nevada.

"I need to hurry my wife will be home in 10 minutes" Talk about cutting it close.

"Don't laugh, I giggle when I finish." sweetest gentleman ever, unfortunately his giggle was infectious.

From other providers....

"I cant be a dancer, that is just gross. grinding on all those men all day." From an escort who offered 60 dollar lollies

"I hate white guys." from a provider who refused to see African American clients, Asian clients, or middle eastern clients.

"If it wasn't for this business I would be at a 24/7 bar trying to get laid every day of the week" trust me she wouldn't have to try hard

"Everything tastes better after an orgasm."


I have much better ones from dancers and my time in gentlemen clubs

" I love you." Enough said, that's scary.

Grizzly,
Don't you think it is just a little bit to soon for you to be asking what funny, crazy and sad stuff we have heard in the hobby.

Just Saying Originally Posted by ElumEno

Why do you think that its a little to soon for him to ask this. The man apologized, you weren't hurt were you, then let it go for fucks sake.

Why do you think that its a little to soon for him to ask this. The man apologized, you weren't hurt were you, then let it go for fucks sake. Originally Posted by dirty dog

I missed you DD!!

I have OFTEN heard, "I love you" or "I love you baby" during the heat of the moment. Yikes! I don't think we really know quite what to think.... was it the heat of the moment or something else?

I have OFTEN heard, "I love you" or "I love you baby" during the heat of the moment. Yikes! I don't think we really know quite what to think.... was it the heat of the moment or something else? Originally Posted by Holly Love

I always change it up when clients say that. I'm like, "yea, you love this pussy?!!"

Why do you think that its a little to soon for him to ask this. The man apologized, you weren't hurt were you, then let it go for fucks sake. Originally Posted by dirty dog

DD, your Sicilian is showing.
Read what the OP asked... he asked what Crazy, Funny or Sad things we have heard in the hobby.
Maybe it is because I have not been around the hobby for that long, but for me the events that the OP has been involved in over the last few weeks fit all three for me.

Now you might think that I am jumping on him, I am not, hell I have been in his shoes, the difference is that he had more gonads then I did and posted about it all over the board.
Yes there are a lot of others that are jumping his ass about it...
I believe that he is smart enough to know that most of them are not doing it because they think they are smarter or better them him, but because they have been in his place at one time or another.

Maybe someday some lurker will be going through same crazy shit and happen upon the posts that Grizzly made,
and in reading them realize that we all make mistakes and the he is not the only one before he does something really stupid. if you know what I mean.

DD, your Sicilian is showing.
Read what the OP asked... he asked what Crazy, Funny or Sad things we have heard in the hobby.
Maybe it is because I have not been around the hobby for that long, but for me the events that the OP has been involved in over the last few weeks fit all three for me.

Now you might think that I am jumping on him, I am not, hell I have been in his shoes, the difference is that he had more gonads then I did and posted about it all over the board.
Yes there are a lot of others that are jumping his ass about it...
I believe that he is smart enough to know that most of them are not doing it because they think they are smarter or better them him, but because they have been in his place at one time or another.

Maybe someday some lurker will be going through same crazy shit and happen upon the posts that Grizzly made,
and in reading them realize that we all make mistakes and the he is not the only one before he does something really stupid. if you know what I mean. Originally Posted by ElumEno

If doing or saying something stupid is cause for people to not post then this would be a very very empty board.