Whats up with the NBM

  • lyfej
  • 04-09-2013, 07:31 AM
What the hell did a BLACK MAN do??? Just curious why in the hell do I never see a provider say... NO MEXICAN MEN, NO ASIAN MEN . NO UGLY MEN, NO FAT MEN.. Yes people have their preferences...But damn.. BLACK MEN seem to be the group relegated to this special status....Plenty of women see BLACK MEN so a brother can get laid...Just curious.. What the hell did BLACK MEN do to receive such special status in the ATX ECCIE world?

LJ
What the hell did a BLACK MAN do??? Just curious why in the hell do I never see a provider say... NO MEXICAN MEN, NO ASIAN MEN . NO UGLY MEN, NO FAT MEN..
Yes people have their preferences
...But damn.. BLACK MEN seem to be the group relegated to this special status....Plenty of women see BLACK MEN so a brother can get laid...Just curious.. What the hell did BLACK MEN do to receive such special status in the ATX ECCIE world?

LJ Originally Posted by lyfej
You've already answered your own question. Likewise fewer mongers see Black providers for the very same reason. Seeking specifics about why is only setting up an unpleasant and likely to be offensive thread. It is what it is.

You can always start up another escort site catering specifically to the Black community just as many dating sites do.

The real question is as a Black man (Assuming you are) do you yourself prefer light, brown or dark meat? Be honest.
sue_nami's Avatar
I do see his point tho, why do no providers say no Asians, or no latinos or gawd forbid no white dudes? black guys are the only ones singled out for special exclusion in this community. and despite all the lame explanations of pimps and such, I just don't get it either. I am not saying u cant have preferences but as a whole community, how the hell did we end up here?
atxwrx's Avatar
I feel your pain, but it has been discussed millions of times before. I have heard it is a preference. I have heard that it is b/c we are too big. I have heard it is b/c they had a bad experience once and now do not feel safe. I have heard b/c we could be pimps. I have heard it is b/c they think we will rip them off. There are lots of reasons. Now given, all of those things can be true with any race/creed/color, but certain groups are always singled out.

Early on, I use to try to "convince" a girl to see me when they had a NBA policy, but I wised up quick. I politely ask up front if they are or are not comfortable with a black guy. If a lady doesn't want to see me b/c I am black, I move on. Why waste my time and money on someone who doesn't want to see? Is it fucked up and does it bother me? Yup. But I would rather see someone who has no stips on seeing me and is comfortable with seeing me b/c if there is any kind of reservations from the lady, you are not going to enjoy the time b/c she isn't in to it.
  • lyfej
  • 04-09-2013, 10:12 AM
I prefer a sexy women, be she light, brown,or dark. Why not ask why? Why does an answer have to be unpleasant or offensive? Assuming you are White man and not a woman, I'd be more interested in a woman's perspective.
sue_nami's Avatar
atxwrx, you're a very wise man. Please accept my apology for the way the community as whole treats black men and rest assured that not all providers are racist.
  • lyfej
  • 04-09-2013, 10:14 AM
Again, I'm just curious. I'm not offended by the policy. Just curious. It makes me go.... hmmmmmm,]... when I see it in a providers ad.
I do see his point tho, why do no providers say no Asians, or no latinos or gawd forbid no white dudes? black guys are the only ones singled out for special exclusion in this community. and despite all the lame explanations of pimps and such, I just don't get it either. I am not saying u cant have preferences but as a whole community, how the hell did we end up here? Originally Posted by sue_nami

Unless things have changed recently (They may have) you don't find too many providers on ECCIE refusing to see Black men.

It's reasonable to say providers on BP and other places have had more unpleasant experiences with black clients than any other race.

All one has to do is look at online alerts to see a myriad of what those experiences have been.
atxwrx's Avatar
Codybeast, you would be surprised on how many ladies on here who have a NBA policy......

As far as online alerts, it is sooooo funny how you see alerts on a "big black guy doing something bad" but in reality, the guys who treat girls the worst are the "well respected" gents on here. I have had many many conversations with ladies who are manhandled, threatened and forced to do things that they are not comfortable with. You read in the review about how great of a time that was had but in reality, it wasn't all that rosy for the lady. All I am saying is not all things are as they appear. The unfortunate consequence of the negative press about blacks, so to speak is that sometimes I get refused service. Discrimination happens in all aspects of life. It is naive to think that for some reason that it will not happen here. I am not saying it is acceptable. I am saying that you have to know how to deal with it and move on.
atxwrx, you're a very wise man. Please accept my apology for the way the community as whole treats black men and rest assured that not all providers are racist. Originally Posted by sue_nami
I would have to say that is an unfair assessment. One's discomfort with sharing BCD with any particular race/look does not make them a racist. It is their body and the encounter is quite intimate. No matter how professional a provider is she still has the right to enjoy her job and the encounter.
To look down upon another as a fellow human based upon race is truly racist. We get that you are willing to see Black men as all Black mongers here now can see. That is a preference.

Some of my closest friends are black and I even have some Black family although not black myself. The fact that I am not physically attracted to Black women does not in anyway imply that I am a racist. I like what I like. First preference is exotic sorts, next is Caucasian and I guess that's about it thus far. There are however exceptions such as Venessa Williams or Halle Berry.
sue_nami's Avatar
if u are prejudiced against black men when u don't know them at all and have a blanket nba policy,. I'm sorry but that is racist. you can sugar coat it and call it preferences but they are discriminating against an entire group of people based on skin color alone.
atxwrx's Avatar
atxwrx, you're a very wise man. Please accept my apology for the way the community as whole treats black men and rest assured that not all providers are racist. Originally Posted by sue_nami
I may speak for myself but no apology is needed. Life is life. As you live, you learn how to deal with things. I won't even go as far as to say that they are racist. Some are but some it is ignorance and bias, and personal preference. There is no amount of discussion that can be had that will change someone's mind. It is just a waste of breath. You find out what the circumstances are and you deal with the circumstances. That is the way it goes.
RALPHEY BOY's Avatar
as long as we are on the topic

Why do East Indians for the most do not marry outside of their race?
Why do Asians for the most part to do not marry outside of their race?
Why do whites for the most part do not marry outside of their race?
Why do Blacks for the most part do not marry outside of their race?

its because most people like what they look like... I do not think its racist, its just how it is...

does not mean you have to abide by this do what you like!!
if u are prejudiced against black men when u don't know them at all and have a blanket nba policy,. I'm sorry but that is racist. you can sugar coat it and call it preferences but they are discriminating against an entire group of people based on skin color alone. Originally Posted by sue_nami

We are talking about sharing one's body not a dinner or social event. I imagine the reason for a "Blanket" NBA policy might be that as a provider there's just no knowing for sure who is going to show up at the door and by then it's too late.
If they knew in advance it would be Denzel then maybe things would be different.
atxwrx's Avatar
as long as we are on the topic

Why do East Indians for the most do not marry outside of their race?
Why do Asians for the most part to do not marry outside of their race?
Why do whites for the most part do not marry outside of their race?
Why do Blacks for the most part do not marry outside of their race?

its because most people like what they look like... I do not think its racist, its just how it is...

does not mean you have to abide by this do what you like!! Originally Posted by RALPHEY BOY
REB, that is in a lil different context than having a blanket NBA policy, even though your overall statement is fairy true.

It is hard to explain how it feels to be discriminated against when you are not the one being discriminated against. Sure, you may have a story or two about "that time" when you were discriminated against for whatever reason, but unless you live it on an every day basis, there is no way of conveying it. That is why I say it is a waste of breath trying to explain.