Why all "No AA" postings lately
Was wondering what is happening as of late. I am starting to see more and more women post on their add that they don't see African Americans. Is our donation different then anyone else? Am I missing something? Just wondering if something is going wrong and how we could resolve it for the good guys like me. Could anyone please shed any light on this for me? You can PM me if that is better for you.
I enjoy all men as long as I am respected but that is me.
This topic has been beat to hell here. It's beyond old.
well maybe the white guys who've been around here for a while think it's old but what about the black guys who just entered the hobby encounter it and go WTF? IMHO It is always a valid question because this guy now is facing prejudice here in this town when he tries to find a match. Personally, I see all races and think good guys and assholes appear in all skin colors. We should all question why this is acceptable here and thru out the south and pretty much not an issue up north.
I hate when people talk about race, I think every ethnic group has beautiful people! Racism is for ignorant people who believe that their particular group is superior to all others. Let the truth be told, there is no such thing as a "Pure Race" anymore. Everyone is mixed with something, some just go back further than others. Ladies, never worry, my green money is good for every shade in the spectrum!!!! I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!
I love all men, older, younger, heavy or not like Truly Passion said as long as there nice and a gent, never had problems before and hoping to not run into any in the future. And as puccipleaser said all moneys green honey.
hell u could be blue and as long as u pass my screening ill c ya.. i have no prejudice watsover
alot of providers it is a preference tho
hell u could be blue and as long as u pass my screening ill c ya.. i have no prejudice watsover alot of providers it is a preference tho
Originally Posted by amylove
Love it lol
are you sure you would see a smurf?????? :-)
I love smurfs!! I help them with their blue balls problem.
- EZguy
- 06-07-2013, 08:48 AM
I am a traveling guy so I am somewhat used to cancellations. Locals/regs always receive priority. I understand and accept that. Nevertheless I had a cancellation this morning and find myself in a hotel room with nothing to do for two hours so I decided to respond to this thread. I will obviously not be very popular with those who have already posted.
First of all I think any discussion of an NBA policy in the Hobby should be viewed in the broader context of discrimination. An NBA policy is only one form of discrimination prevalent in the Hobby!
Above all else the Hobby is about choice!
Choice by the Hobbyist
Choice by the Provider
A Hobbyist must first select or choose a Provider.
Then a Provider must select or choose to see the Hobbyist.
Both parties must make an agreeable choice or selection before a meeting can be arranged. In the Hobby World choice is not a one-way proposition.
Providers use “screening” as a tool for choice or selection…actually screening is a de-selection process but it is still fundamental to the choice made by the Provider. The Provider often de-selects or chooses “not to see” Hobbyists based upon known information or lack of information regarding the Hobbyist. From a purely economic self-interest point of view the Provider begins the process wanting to see every Hobbyist. I say this because it is reasonable to assume most Providers want to maximize their business model. The Provider then uses her own de-selection criteria to eliminate Hobbyists that might make her uncomfortable…based on her own personal reasons/preferences.
Because choice is inherent in the Hobby, discrimination, by extension, is part of the Hobby. Discrimination exists on many levels. The reality is that everyone (Hobbyists and Providers) in the Hobby engages in some form of discrimination. Racism is only one form or expression of discrimination…no better and no worse than any other form. Discrimination can be observed based upon age (too young or too old), pricing strategy, comments and reviews posted, frequency of Hobby visits over a period of time, newbie status, height-weight ratio, menu, dick size (whether it is the size of a coke can or the size of a Vienna sausage), Race etc. Remember, Race is just one form of discrimination.
As enumerated above discrimination in the Hobby obviously comes in many forms. And you know what? In the context of the Hobby, discrimination is acceptable. It is more than acceptable…it is a good thing. Yes, I said discrimination is a good thing. If a Provider is not comfortable for any reason the Provider should not choose to see a Hobbyist. I cannot imagine anything more personal than the Hobby experience. Remember, we are not asking Providers to wash our cars! We are asking them to do the most personal of personal deeds. And no Provider should ever do anything they are not comfortable with. And no Hobbyist should ever ask a Provider to do anything they are uncomfortable with.
I think all Hobbyists at some point have been discriminated against. I certainly have encountered discrimination. I have had my requests rejected or not responded to on numerous occasions. But there is no reason to take Provider discrimination as personal rejection. They don’t know me as a person so there is no way for the rejection to be personal. Instead of taking the rejection personally we should merely accept the Provider’s decision and move on. There are hundreds of others to choose from…just move on to the next one.
I recall a top San Antonio Provider recently stating she did not like seeing fat guys or guys with little dicks. Is that discrimination? Of course it is. Now if you are a fat guy or a skinny guy with a little dick would you want to know the preferences that drive her de-selection process? I want to know because there is no sense wasting my time if I am a fat guy or have a little dick. Discrimination is sometimes hurtful but it is also helpful as long as we don’t take it personally.
If a Provider does not want to see you is the “why” really important?
Seriously, do you really want to see someone who does not want to see you?
I will always defend a woman’s right to discriminate in the Hobby. It is common sense, respectful and the right thing to do. But I also think it is appropriate for Providers to state their restrictions in their Showcases (age, newbie status, NBA, etc.). Please save me the time of trying to figure out your restrictions. I can’t look at your ass and read your mind. List them and I will happily comply. You won’t receive an inquiry from me if I know I don’t fit your preferences. Please extend Hobbyists the courtesy of disclosing your restrictions.
Critical analysis involves parsing the argument in order to study all positions. So let’s flip the discussion. Do Providers encounter and suffer from discrimination by Hobbyists? Of course they do. Hobbyists, just like Providers, have preferences that cause them to discriminate. Some Hobbyists prefer and only see spinners. Is that discrimination against BBW Providers? Yes, it is. Do Hobbyists discriminate in their choice of Providers based upon age, looks, color of hair, breast size, menu, tattoos or Race? Yes, we do. Hobbyists also have preferences which manifest in the form of discrimination. As far as Race is concerned many Hobbyists discriminate by pursuing Latinas, Asians or the ever rare and elusive intelligent blondes.
If you discriminate as a Hobbyist in your selection process what gives you the right to be upset when Providers discriminate in their selection process? Maybe you do or don’t discriminate based upon Race but I will guarantee that you discriminate on some basis. If not, you would simply start calling Providers whose name begin with the letter A.
Side note: my comments regarding Hobbyist discrimination refer to gentlemen in the Hobby who are not under the influence of alcohol. Everyone knows that any guy who has too much to drink will fork a rattlesnake if he can get his buddy to hold the rattlesnake’s head. Men simply don’t discriminate at closing time…never have…never will.
Back on topic…Choice is the central feature of the Hobby. Along with Choice, respect is also integral to the Hobby. Without respect the Hobby would quickly become a scary and unappealing place. It is critical for all parties to demonstrate basic respect and courtesy. That means both Providers and Hobbyists should respect each other’s preferences and choices. In Hobby World all of us practice and should accept discrimination.
I typically write a very long and detailed introductory letter with my appointment requests. I go into detail describing what I perceive to be are my negatives…reasons a Provider might not want to meet me. If there is a problem I prefer to address it upfront. I make it easy for a Provider to say no to me. If they say no I move on and never look back. I repeat…I never look back.
With all human interaction the ideal situation is to understand and accept the other person’s actions or point of view. But real life is seldom ideal. Often we don’t understand the other person but nevertheless, we must accept the reality of their actions or decisions.
JDog, I understand why you don’t like or understand Providers having an NBA policy, but you must accept it. All of us accept at some point that some of the Providers we want to see are simply not accessible to us. Sometimes it is about more than money. Whining and complaining is a negative exercise and a total waste of energy. Move on to the next one. Like the Providers, you have other choices.
I suggest you focus your time, energy and monies on those Providers that don’t have an NBA policy. Focusing on what you can’t have will only lead to more negative frustration/feelings. It is better to focus on what you can have.
You can choose to be happy
or
You can choose to be pissed off, bitter and unhappy
Make a choice!
Life is not a dress rehearsal. Find a way to enjoy today…the here and now. The Hobby is supposed to be fun. If not, what’s the point?
My personal choice:
I avoid all drama and go where respect is reciprocated. At this stage of my life my goal is to lower the “shit factor” wherever and whenever possible. For me it is a worthy goal. As a young man I spent way too much time emulating Don Quixote’s futile actions of tilting at windmills…mostly to no avail.
In Hobby World everyone lies. Everyone discriminates.
I love smurfs!! I help them with their blue balls problem.
Originally Posted by sue_nami
ive heard the way to cure it in a smurf involves sitting on their face to create a tight seal and then blowing the other end
- in2d8
- 06-07-2013, 11:53 AM
I decided to respond to this thread.
In the Hobby World choice is not a one-way proposition.
Originally Posted by EZguy
Bravo! Spot on in my opinion, and very well said!