Bro's before Ho's.... Right? Look the other way and cut a brother some slack? Or?

I make personal one on one introductions of Guys I know from within the community to girls I know from a variety of situations....

I make it a common practice of clarifying how much I know about a guy before I make an introduction. I provide as much information about a lady when I talk to the guy as I can.

Then.... Whatever happens happens....

It has gone wrong a time or two when a guy turned out to be a bit rude... or too pushy for the ladies tastes.....

But before today I never felt it involved an attitude or persona that was risky on either side of the equation....

I recently introduced A to B. B is a stripper and a long time friend.

They hit it off, found something in common and saw each other a few times....

A seemed to develop feelings that I believe from what I recently witnessed qualify as obsession as well as stalking....

Over the last couple of weeks B has talked to me a time or two about things she was starting to feel uncomfortable about and thought she had it all under control...

I offered to intervene at one point and she said she would handle it....

The other night things seem to have come to a head....

B was with C eating with A who was trying to arrange for some time with one or both of them when B called me.... Wanting me to come meet her and C....

They dump A and head off....

In the meantime I call A.... Bros before Hos right?.... What's up.... I find out C is pretty wasted and I dislike drunks so I decide to hold off and since this problem seems to be escalating I invite buddy A to come to where I am and talk about it....

During the conversation B calls me a few times and he hears her in the background and wants to know what's going on....

I don't lie to buddies so I explained it to him for about the tenth time.... B and I are friends and will always be friends.... he decides he HAS to confront her no matter what I say....

I tell him I'll be down a bit after him and maybe we can all get this in line....

I get him "talked down" so I think and he decides to go off to where he knows B and C are.... He confronts her.....

She calls me and tells me to meet her and C somewhere else....

I'm on my way to P10 and end up on the phone with A again who tells me he knows they are going and that they ditched him again.... I confirm it and all of a sudden I hear him honking his horn and yelling.. "there they are.... there they are"

evidently he's cruising down the highway trying to get their attention....

Again I try to tell him to back down.... I call her and warn her this isn't looking too good.....

I get to P10 ahead of them and am sitting in my car when A B and C show up in three separate cars....

I watch a confrontation between A and B and then he storms into the club....


I talk to both girls a bit before going in and I say hello to him as well as others and eventually make my way to the other side of the club and sit down .... girls are supposed to be over in a minute..... when I go and sit down he comes and joins me.... She ups and bolts.....

Trying to diffuse the situation I introduce him to M... A dancer at P10 that plays....

The girls end up sitting with management and we are there till closing but every time he sees B get up and go anywhere he follows... to the bar.. to VIP... etc...

After closing he makes a point of stopping at the table and then leaves... comes back...leaves comes back etc......

I'm there talking to the DJ who I know for 20 years..... watching all this repeat.....

I talk to A on the way home and call him the next day to make sure he is OK... I felt he had drank a good bit....

Later the next night I get blasted by B..... A has told her something I suspect and when she calls me to talk about it I am in a meeting and can't talk........

We finally talk it out this morning......

She tells He's got "proof" of everything I have said to him or shown him regarding her..... He's doing everything he can to drive a wedge between us..... I tell her everything I know and tell her to tell him to present whatever proof he has.....

She doesn't know who to believe so I answer every question she has... we talk through everything and stay friends....

After all..... We've known each other a few years, I'm always there for her and want nothing from her..... We get together when SHE wants to.... and she is in total control of when she interacts with me.....

I ask her to sit back and think about why I would have any motivation to be dihonest with her vs a guy chasing her down a highway honking at her that won't leave her alone in a public place when she obviously is with other people and does not want to interact with him....

She finally "gets it" i think....

Hopefully she will reconsider what kind of guy this jerk is and outside of taking him for every penny she can.. steer clear of him....

I truly believe he has crossed the line to obsession..... I was telling him that the other night but obviously did not get through to him......

I witnessed the stalking behavior myself.... as well as heard it in the background as well as from her 2nd hand over the last couple of weeks.....

I know I will never again introduce this guy to another lady...... I've already emailed the gal I introduced him to the other night to warn her.....

I also know that he can't be trusted to say anything to.... to share information with....... as he seems to have repeated every word that came out of my mouth to her....At one point the other night I asked him (two phones on the table in front of me) if he was recording what we were talking about....... Maybe at that time I should have recognized the warning bells in my head....

I reassured him that I always put a buddy above a lady as it is much harder to build relationships with a good guy than it is to find a new lady to take my money.... I thought he was the kind of guy that could respect that but I was obviously very wrong....

Do you think it is enough for me to simply no longer respond to him or provide him information or should behavior like this be "outed"?

Guys do you want to know if your sitting at a table with or sharing information with someone that will present "proof" to some lady he is obsessed with of what you say and do?

Ladies, Do you feel the behavior as described constitutes any kind of risk to you? He is a member of this community.

Um. Did you come here for validation on what you already know is the answer?

YES! He's DSMIV crazy.
YES! The women here who may potentially meet this guy need to know who he is.

And why does it have to be "bros before hos" IF it's truly a safety concern you have? Just let it be what it is and do the right thing......... it's not that hard. Follow your own moral compass, if you have one.

Well.....

1) Ladies DO screen and make their own decisions....
2) He has seen and reviewed ladies in this community and professionals do have the ability to better "detach" after a session than the avg stripper might have....
3) There appears to be no visible alerts or negative information on him at the moment....
4) he is a P411 member
5) I asked around BEFORE I introduced him to the lady as she IS someone I know and I would not want to put her in the company of someone unstable.... I was told there was no negative info anywhere about him.....

One line of thinking is that this is not a typical reaction he might have interacting with a provider who ends her involvement typically at the end of an hour.....

Strippers tend to spend more time with guys and befriend them much more often than providers so he may never present a potential problem for a lady here.

Lonely guys love attention and I think she gave him a bit too much and let herself get in a bit too deep.....

And why ask the question? Not necessarily for validation....

maybe for the discussion that ensues and the impact it might have on him.... maybe it will wake his ass up to what he is behaving like..... Kind of like Group Therapy?....

Maybe I am wrong in being concerned about it.... Read 1-5 above.... I want to think the best of a guy..... But.....


But honestly..... I'm fucking pissed and my first reaction is to fry him but I find that often I get better advice from others that have dealt with similar situations....

Not the kind of questions I can ask elsewhere now are they?

OK, am I missing something? If he is currently on this board won't he read this? Do you not think he will recognize who this post is about? If he is really THAT far gone then some type warning might be appropriate before something serious happens.......if you think it could go there........

OK, am I missing something? If he is currently on this board won't he read this? Do you not think he will recognize who this post is about? If he is really THAT far gone then some type warning might be appropriate before something serious happens.......if you think it could go there........ Originally Posted by richcran

Please read 1-5 of the 2nd post..... he appears to be safe when it comes to girls he sees from the site....

Yes I am sure he will eventually read this..... I hope like hell he reads it.....

Is he "that far gone"? I'm one person with an opinion...... I "think" so but I'm putting it out there for others to look at and tell me what they think.....

to me sounds like A-Z are all 1 or 2 short of a 6 pack

Bro's before Ho's
Slits before Dicks.

however you want to put, everyone still has their own agenda and only care about themselves at the end of the day..

Wow. Too much for me. I could only get through half of the original post. Too tiring.
Not a fan of extreme drama. My life has nothing like this going on in it. Heart attack material. Bad for the mind and body...

Good luck to everyone.

Whispers my friend, If I were you I would tell this dude to back the hell off, and leave your ladyfriend of many years alone.

Forget the ho/bro, man/woman shit, this is a friend issue. You have known the lady for many years and that qualifies as friendship. From what I can tell you don't know the dude that well.

I'm not sure that the hobby community needs to know who this guy is, as his crazy acts were not against a provider... still on the fence on that one. But if dude gets physical, or threatens to get physical I say to out his ass.

LF

YES! Thats a BIG risk! Stalking is never good... but if shes seen how he acts and you offered to help her get away from him and she says no, you've done all you can.

Hopefully shes a mature woman and handles the situation accordingly

Um. Did you come here for validation on what you already know is the answer?
. Originally Posted by karmaofaustin

Sounds to me as if the OP is a narcissist and wants the rest of us to know he is super cool and despite whatever crazies he might have lunch with, he is and will always be the man with his ladies.

whispers,

what a situation. i honestly got tired of reading it. its too bad that some can't handle the reality of a P4P whether its a P10 gal or provider. at the end of the day its all about the dollar. i know you know that and most of the men here but you have the lonely guys who can't.

i would say to expose him, he should not mess up or make you look bad to anyone. you are doing him the favor of introducing him to people who will stretch his dollar. he owes you by taking care of his business. Pay to play and the leave the girls alone unless they want you, truly want you.

You said it best when u said you can't trust him.......... I think you answered your own question there with that statement

The only way "Bro's before Ho's" works, is if both the 'Bro's' understand and adhere to it.

Without that, there is nothing before anything.

The only way "Bro's before Ho's" works, is if both the 'Bro's' understand and adhere to it.

Without that, there is nothing before anything. Originally Posted by rekcaSxT

Well... I totally misjudged this guy....... Not the first time I have mislay-ed trust...probably not the last time....

Whispers my friend, If I were you I would tell this dude to back the hell off, and leave your lady friend of many years alone. Originally Posted by LadiesFan

.....but if shes seen how he acts and you offered to help her get away from him and she says no, you've done all you can.

Hopefully shes a mature woman and handles the situation accordingly Originally Posted by AmayaMoore

I can't really do any more than I have unless she asks me to and she has wavered back and forth on the subject..... She's pretty non confrontational and tends to try to "ignore everything" for a while hoping it all just goes away.....

Plus.... The guy has been a bit of a cash cow for her and friends..... In one of our recent conversations I reminded her of what I told one of her friends more than a year ago about a guy that was really rude to he..... "Guys that want to act like assholes and treat a lady in a rude or ugly manner get no sympathy from me if they get taken to the cleaners if they let their heart get involved".....

Phuck the bro who is acting like a ho.