Tell me what I did wrong

I'm 34 yr old, professional male and am too busy for a relationship so I've been thinking about giving the hobby a try. I was out of town for business this weekend and decided to check out ads on backpage. I found a provider and googled her number. She came up on another site, but I couldn't find any reviews (I was searching on my phone, which is less than ideal). I decided to give her a call and see if she was available. I called in the morning and she was in the process of changing hotels and asked me to call later.

After some meetings, I was finished working for the day and called her around 4. She told me she was available and told me what hotel she was at. I was completely unfamiliar with the town and told her I needed the address. She said she'd text it to me I didn't get it, so I sent her a text about 15 min later and she responded with the general location of the hotel. I found the address and told her I'd be there in 15 min.

When I got to the hotel, I called her to tell her I was there. She said she was getting ready to shower and to give her 15 or 20 min. I said okay and waited in the car. 30 minutes passed and I hadn't heard from her. I sent her a text and asked if we were still on. She simply sent back "Yes". Another 15 minutes passed and I sent her another text and said that if she was too busy to see me that evening, no worries but I didn't want to sit in the car all night waiting.

She responded almost immediately and said that she was sorry, she was ready now and that if I'd come back, she'd see me right away. I told her I was still outside the hotel. She sent me a message back and said, "Wow, they usually don't wait. ARE YOU THE POLICE? Must be!" I sent her a text and said that no, I was just a regular guy who wanted to hang out. She apologized and sent me a msg back telling me to park behind the hotel. I was already a little freaked out and nervous, but I drove to the back of the hotel and told her I was parked there and described my little SUV. She never responded and after 10 more minutes I took off, afraid that I was going to get either robbed or carjacked or something.

Now, I don't really think she had any ill intentions, aside from maybe giving me the run around while she saw other clients, but I'm wondering if I should have done something differently. I'm sure I made a dozen mistakes, but as I said, I've never made any attempts to see a provider and didn't really know what to do aside from never mention money or sex.

So tear me apart and tell me everything I did wrong so I never do it again.

She's a nut. Simple. She's in the wrong.

Using backpage and not finding any reviews was a big mistake, backpage is generally ok when you find all good reviews on the lady... Just research who you call first......

Tell you what you did wrong? Okay...

...decided to check out ads on backpage... Originally Posted by thooperpics

I quit reading after that monumental mistake on your part...

Yeah, after doing some research online today, I realized that backpage probably wasn't the best idea. Lesson learned.

You might get @ 20% success/satisfaction with BP, you have a higher percentage of getting mugged/bait n switch,etc. One of two things, she was setting you up to get robbed or she was on Staff edit, mention of illegal substances are not allowed, CZ and isn't too sure which planet she's on!

Yikes! Sounds like I "got lucky" after all!

Yikes! Sounds like I "got lucky" after all! Originally Posted by thooperpics

Thats how I got here, bad experience years back on a Craigs/BP ad. Glad nothing bad ever happened.

You sound really upset about this.

Personally, I don't think you did anything wrong, except for one important factor.

You cannot appear to be too eager to see these girls.

On the first meeting, some of them are very afraid of LE so your first order of business is to put her mind at ease.

You have to be very casual and understand that any scheduled meet can fall apart for any trivial little thing. Real or imagined.

. . .If your heart is set on this girl, you might try setting up another session with her, but take it easy and have a back-up plan.

First off, I know exactly your situation. I was the same way about 20 years ago-- no time for a relationship but horny as hell. Hobby has filled those need Now as many have already said, your only mistake was using BP as your only source of selecting a provider. BP is just one of many sources. What you really need is to be a member of a board like ECCIE. Which board depends on the region you live in. I notice you listed Pennsylvania as your location. ECCIE is not that popular up there. BUT, there is a very, very good board for that region. It is Indys.com. Check it out. Join it. They have some wonderful ladies there and quite a few are newbie friendly. Good luck!

Going with Backpage was definitely a rookie mistake. Stick with well reviewed girls here, or you might want to look into joining a verification service like P411 or RS2000.

Backpage is hit or miss

Thanks for the help and advice, everyone! I wasn't too upset about the issue yesterday (aside from sitting in my car for 2 hours, and for buying a box of condoms that I didn't get to use, haha), but I was wondering if I broke some sort of hobbyist rule or something like that. I'd never really done much research on this, so I didn't entirely know what to do or expect.

I'll definitely absorb everything I can find here and keep studying.

Nothing wrong with backpage, if you are researching.

As you soon started that texting back and forth, oh wait im in the shower, oh wait park in the back, oh wait im not ready yet......you should have moved on dude.

It should not be like that. Next time research her. Check the different boards to see if you find her.

Join P411

googled her number. She came up on another site, but I couldn't find any reviews Originally Posted by thooperpics

Not all ladies on backpage are bad. Especially if you can google them and find info, or consistent tours in multiple areas. But right after not finding reviews I would have stopped right there. From here its just a gamble

I decided to give her a call and see if she was available. I called in the morning and she was in the process of changing hotels and asked me to call later. Originally Posted by thooperpics

Depending on the time in which you called this was your fault as well........unless of course she said she had 24 hour availiability in her ad....most hotels have checkout between 10 and 12noon.

But let's say she does have 24 hour availiability. Her telling you to call her back wouldn't have been an issue. Because she would have to check into another hotel for an incall. But keep in mind also, most ladies like early bird appointment set up the night prior. This would give her enough time to get ready before you call.

called her around 4. She told me she was available and told me what hotel she was at. I was completely unfamiliar with the town and told her I needed the address. She said she'd text it to me Originally Posted by thooperpics

Now she just bullshitting. She could have easily told you the address if she was ready like she said she was. The text "difficulty" on her part was a time waster probably so she could get her backup ready. Whether that be her pimp, homegirl or whatever. Once she said she was availiable and then stalled on you....obvious red flag and time waster.

When I got to the hotel, I called her.............give her 15 or 20 min. I said okay............ 30 minutes passed...... I sent her a text and asked if we were still on. She simply sent back "Yes". Another 15 minutes passed and I sent her another text Originally Posted by thooperpics

As a client why are you still texting at this point. She should have the decency to at least let you talk. You sat in the parking lot a total time of 1 and a half hours. That's totally and utterly ridiculous. After the first fifteen minutes and no phone communication I would have jetted.

She apologized and sent me a msg back telling me to park behind the hotel. Originally Posted by thooperpics

Had she asked you to do this immediately after the first fiftheen minutes this might have been a somewhat normal practice. For ladies that don't screen well via backpage, they figure if they can see you walking from the parking lot you must be safe an not LE affliated lol. But now she's just doing it to get the make and model of your car so her homeboy can jack you maybe.

I'm sure I made a dozen mistakes Originally Posted by thooperpics

You did but its ok your just starting. If you continue to see backpage ladies with no rep for good service or reviews this kind of stuff will happen. Cash n dash, robbed, beaten are the worst. Consider yourself lucky your first time was just a time waster. You did nothing wrong sh was just unprofessional and paranoid.......but you were a tad gullible as well.