Newbie "Contact Etiquette" Question...

Hey all, Something I've been wondering: I'm only available fairly sporadically since I work another job and can't seem to find an any one who wants to share an in call -- I can't host. It often happens that I'm contacted by a hobbyist and we can't seem to find the right time so it the correspondence just dies.

Then comes a time when I am available and it would be great to just check back in with them to see if they are too, but I get the impression that "unsolicited" contact is not kosher.
I'm asking about this because I go through the whole screening process initially and have made a decision that they are a good match (I know, I know...I'm pretty picky) and if I post that I'm avail. on the weekend lineup etc... I get an inbox full of new "suitors" and the whole back and forth she-bang starts all over again...
I'm not complaining...I know this is a biz and that entails work, but I sometimes look through the emails of guys that seemed great but feel like I can't say "Hey watcha doing tonight???"

I know texts are probably a real NO NO... but I don't really give out my number till its a definite thing.

like I said, just wondering...
John_Dough's Avatar
It will take a little work but ask each guy if it okay for you to contact them back and if so in what medium. If they don't want you to then move on. But some will appreciate your effort.
Sounds like a tough spot to be , perhaps more availability ? Or like JD said prescreen clients and ask about contacting . But with your sporadic availability , it's going to be necessary to put in the extra effort . If your schedule opens up it should get easier .
knotty man's Avatar
pre screen me and you (or any other lady) can feel free to text me anytime.
im single and no SO.
so weekends are best for me, while all the married guys are with their families
mrhamm's Avatar
If I've not been able to schedule with a lady, I certainly don't mind them contacting me later to see if I'm available if I've contacted them previously.
ozmosys's Avatar
I've been contacted by hobby email from someone I'd seen before. Didn't bother me, that's why it's a hobby email. Seems like it should be okay to contact someone by PM, as long as you're not spamming a lot of people at random. But I'm not real clear on the rules.
runswithscissors's Avatar
Unsolicited texting is considered a no-no, an unwritten rule of the hobby...

However, in your screening process, make clear about your sporadic schedule. And once you have screened and are interested in seeing someone, clear it with them as to whether you can text at an opportune moment or not, in most cases, the lucky guy will clear his schedule to accommodate.

It is a little more involved and a touch more work, but don't you find the rewards, well, rewarding?

I had several Ladies who knew of my crazy overseas travel schedule, but they knew they could text me and just say" I want you now"....thats all it took...

Happy Hunting...
John_Dough's Avatar
they knew they could text me and just say" I want you now"....thats all it took. Originally Posted by runswithscissors
Yup mysterious creatures aren't we !! Haha
austin_191967's Avatar

Then comes a time when I am available and it would be great to just check back in with them to see if they are too, but I get the impression that "unsolicited" contact is not kosher. Originally Posted by Eve_Adams
The way I see it, if I contact you and ask for screening, any further correspondence on your part is not "unsolicited". I may be in the minority on this, but that's just my opinion. Letting me know when you were available would be appreciated.
Gamer's Avatar
  • Gamer
  • 11-21-2012, 10:32 PM
Then comes a time when I am available and it would be great to just check back in with them to see if they are too, but I get the impression that "unsolicited" contact is not kosher. Originally Posted by Eve_Adams
If the hobbyist has already gone through screening and couldn't get schedules to match, then I don't think they'd mind a message when you are available again. I would keep it online with pm's or email though. An unsolicited text/call could get some guys in trouble.

Or you could always ask. =P
This is interesting guys thanks so much for your input!!! I will def ask guys if it's ok to contact in the future tho.... oxoxo
austin_191967's Avatar
For that matter, you can consider this official notice that you can contact me any time you want.



OMG EVE!!! This Is An AMAZING Question!!!!!

AND I Am So Glad That You Brought It To

The Table!!!!!!! I TOO Run Into The SAME

PROBLEM, BUT Yet TOTALLY DIFFERENT!!!


I Am AN EXTREMELY THOROUGH Screener!!!


Which ALWAYS TAKES TIME - Due To Me Being

At The Mercy Of Another Provider To Respond

Back To Me As QUICKLY AND EFFICIENTLY As

I Contacted Them To Inquire!!!!! BUT AS WE ALL

KNOW - We ALL Have REAL LIVES, AND

SOMETIMES IT TAKES TIME!!!!!


Compounding To This Time Delay I Add The Problem Of

Traveling A LOT For Personal Reasons Which Appears To

Put Me In Eve's Shoes (NOT SURE If I Can Fill Them Though )

That My Time Is LIMITED To Be Able To Entertain You SEXY

Gentlemen.



SOOO I Too Pose The Question To You Gentlemen,

Because I Know As A Veteran On The Board That Unsolicited

E-Mails Are EXTREMELY FAUX PA!!!!!!!


I Ask Of The Gentleman That Have Been PreScreened -

Should I Send The Friendly Reminder That I Am In Town

And Available, OR JUST WAIT For You To Contact Me Back?


INQUIRING MINDS WANT TO KNOW.....


P.S. I WOULD NEVER TEXT ANYONE I HAVEN'T ALREADY
MET, AND KNOW THAT IT IS OK - I STRICTLY WORK
THROUGH E-MAIL!!!











runswithscissors's Avatar
The way I see it, if I contact you and ask for screening, any further correspondence on your part is not "unsolicited". I may be in the minority on this, but that's just my opinion. Letting me know when you were available would be appreciated. Originally Posted by austin_191967
Thats a very good point and brings up the key point of this thread...

COMMUNICATION....

Communicate clearly to the gents that you pre-screen and ask if you may text, e-mail or send up smoke signals, whatever, when you are available. Some may have a problem with it, many will not though, and all of them will appreciate the effort you put into asking their opinion, and what form of communication works best for them.

And in a side note....

Both of you lovely Ladies may begin the screening process on me....Im fabulous..
Carl's Avatar
  • Carl
  • 11-22-2012, 02:03 AM
I'm not active as a hobbyist, but when I was: If I had been pre-screened or was a "regular" I had no problem being contacted via PM or hobby email (NOT personal or work email; but some newbs aren't convinced that you really need a throw-away email or phone # for the hobby) for a spur-of-the-moment opportunity, since I was a spur-of-the-moment booker, anyway. But, the only thing that chapped my ass was when a provider I was pre-screened with or a regular of gave that contact info (even though it was hobby-only contact info) to another provider and that provider (who I had never seen) contacted me unsolicited for a session or a double with the provider that I did know. I think as long as you're comfortable (through pre-screening or a regular client) AND you've got an EXPLICIT okay that you can contact them in the future via their contact info, then a heads-up "hey, ya wanna?" is cool.