Seeing providers in public
So, I accidentally stood behind a provider I’ve been wanting to see in line at the grocery store tonight. Didn’t say anything, didn’t gawk, nothing weird. It made me wonder: Ladies, do “hobbiest” ever approach you in public? How do you handle it? Also, guys, have you ever approached a provider you’ve recognized?
The general rule is just don't.
For sure. I would NEVER do that shit. Not even if I’d seen them several times BCD.
Like anything else. Not without permission.
Should have hit on her. Don't tell her you know what she does, might of ended up getting it for free.
Austin may be a big city, but it can sure be a small world....
I have had on three different occasions over the years run into a provider I have known at the grocery store, airport, and a restaurant.
On all three occasions, we never acknowledged the other.
And all three times received a funny text or a winky face text later that evening or the next day.
Yup...it's common courtesy to just move along with no acknowledgement. You never know if they're with their SO, kids, etc. and you may be with the same. I've run into a couple over the years and just walked right by without so much as a nod. I appreciated their discretion and they appreciated mine...it's something you can talk to them about BCD later on.
Once at an Italian restaurant with my then sugar baby, I ran into a mod and a provider I had seen for FBSM a few times. We exchanged a smile and PMed about it later.
I've seen a few providers out in stores and 1x at a gas station as we pumped (separately!)gas. Never approached them. On 3 occasions providers I frequently booked with approached me to chat while shopping.
If you have a "relationship" then sure. I have been out to lunch off the clock and shopping as well with a couple of providers that I would like to call a friend. Be polite and respond appropriately. If you recognize her, she likely recognizes you. So don't take the lead other than a smile and a quiet
hello.
I feel like it is a case by case kind of thing.
If you have a relationship with her and she tells you that it's fine, it is fine. (I'm assuming you know her RW name or will be discreet enough not to address her by her hobby name)
If you have never met her, NO!!! That is extremely invasive and kind of creepy.
Now, if you havent met or even if you have, you can always quickly look up her number, send her a text INTRODUCING YOURSELF and letting her know that you saw her and let it be up to her if it is an appropriate time to do a meet and greet.
I've had a couple guys recognize me at the grocery store, send me a text and then we ended up chatting a few minutes after we both agreed it was an appropriate time.
I also have regulars who I wouldn't mind if they came up and said hello, gave me a hug and chit chatted about the weather with me. Discreetly, of course. But no one in my life is intrusive, so they wouldn't ask any questions that would make it uncomfortable. Also, I'm blessed with a RW job that allows easy cover, if they do happen to ask.
Honestly, JUST ASK FIRST! Remember that we are real people with real lives, families and friends and we should be allowed to expose them to as much or as little of this community as we are personally comfortable with.
Xo
I feel like it is a case by case kind of thing.
If you have a relationship with her and she tells you that it's fine, it is fine. (I'm assuming you know her RW name or will be discreet enough not to address her by her hobby name)
If you have never met her, NO!!! That is extremely invasive and kind of creepy.
Now, if you havent met or even if you have, you can always quickly look up her number, send her a text INTRODUCING YOURSELF and letting her know that you saw her and let it be up to her if it is an appropriate time to do a meet and greet.
I've had a couple guys recognize me at the grocery store, send me a text and then we ended up chatting a few minutes after we both agreed it was an appropriate time.
I also have regulars who I wouldn't mind if they came up and said hello, gave me a hug and chit chatted about the weather with me. Discreetly, of course. But no one in my life is intrusive, so they wouldn't ask any questions that would make it uncomfortable. Also, I'm blessed with a RW job that allows easy cover, if they do happen to ask.
Honestly, JUST ASK FIRST! Remember that we are real people with real lives, families and friends and we should be allowed to expose them to as much or as little of this community as we are personally comfortable with.
Xo
- Old-T
- 10-24-2018, 03:36 PM
Ava, as always a sound opinion. Every guy (and lady) here should read it.
Can't overemphasize the importance of talking about things in advance, and when in doubt, choose the discrete option.
It is different each time... I saw a provider 2 hours after our session out with her family at a restaurant... We obviously were strangers...
I saw another provider at a strip club and we shared a table for half an hour and talked about rescheduling, but never did...
I also saw a provider at my work, I used to work service industry, and she stayed at the bar till closing time and came home with me... We became fwb for a few months.
Just dont be creepy, treat each person like you would want to be treated, unless you like to be peed on, then never do that unless they ask
Agree. Eye contact and body language speaks volumes as to how you would handle the situation.