Wives and SOs of Hobbyists

I was wondering why married men are also hobbyists. Are wives and Ss not providing adequate sex lives for hobbyists?

Also does your wife or SO know or suspect that you are using a provider?

My wife is a professional woman who is not interested in sex most of the time. She knows that I use providers on occasion but does not want to know any specifics.

1. I think its natural for married men to be hobbyists. Strippers and Providers don't care if we are married and can provide variety. They have been very understanding and wonderful.
2. My wife has been aware of my hobbying as she wants a business relationship due to female surgery / menopause issues.
3. I do not discuss hobbying with the wife and deflect any questions which may arise. Sorta like the Air Force denying any UFO activity at Area 51 or what may be going on at some secret base.

My wife has been a high priced provider who catered to businessmen. She says that many did not have great sex lives with their wives. However, the biggest thing that most sought was that she was a pretty lady who made a fuss over them and made their egos feel good.

My wife and I are children of the 60's and talked about monogamy before we were married. We both agreed that it didn't seem natural and that discreet play by either of us was fine. I was curious about swinging together, but she's not comfortable with that.

Our only rules have been to be discreet, not to play with friends, neighbors, and workmates, and to be safe. Over the course of our 41 year marriage we have both usually traveled on business-related activities several times a year, providing an opportunity for both the traveller and the one staying at home to play discreetly. We're both fine with the arrangement

I have had 3 or 4 brief non-pro affairs, but I typically feel safer seeing providers, and obviously find them more receptive to my more adventuresome interests.

My wife and I still have sex on a weekly basis and enjoy it very much. From my end, being free to have variety and to do things my wife isn't interested in have only made our relationship stronger. Without the outlets, which have typically occurred 5-10 times a year for me, resentment might have built up. As it is, our physical relationship is warm and sweet for both of us, and we remain best friends after all these years.

And I find that, in addition to the sex, that it is just nice to have the fun of getting to know some other women. I have become friends with a handful of providers over the years, and haven't run into a situation where the boundaries got confused.

I doubt this is an easy thing to do for most couples, but it has worked for us.

My wife and I are children of the 60's and talked about monogamy before we were married. We both agreed that it didn't seem natural and that discreet play by either of us was fine. I was curious about swinging together, but she's not comfortable with that.

Our only rules have been to be discreet, not to play with friends, neighbors, and workmates, and to be safe. Over the course of our 41 year marriage we have both usually traveled on business-related activities several times a year, providing an opportunity for both the traveller and the one staying at home to play discreetly. We're both fine with the arrangement

I have had 3 or 4 brief non-pro affairs, but I typically feel safer seeing providers, and obviously find them more receptive to my more adventuresome interests.

My wife and I still have sex on a weekly basis and enjoy it very much. From my end, being free to have variety and to do things my wife isn't interested in have only made our relationship stronger. Without the outlets, which have typically occurred 5-10 times a year for me, resentment might have built up. As it is, our physical relationship is warm and sweet for both of us, and we remain best friends after all these years.

And I find that, in addition to the sex, that it is just nice to have the fun of getting to know some other women. I have become friends with a handful of providers over the years, and haven't run into a situation where the boundaries got confused.

I doubt this is an easy thing to do for most couples, but it has worked for us. Originally Posted by spice-is-nice

Good to know that relationships like these exist. You are very lucky.

"adequate sex lives for hobbyists" I guess mine could be adequate, but adequate is not what I am Pursuing, I want the most I can get from a provider, I want to experience everything I can...no holds barred, do it to me, make me go insane, make it all worth it, no regrets, no turning back, make it new and adventurous, make it an hour that I can't forget. The SO can't do that and there is only one provider that I know of that can do that....I'm not asking for a refund after I die, so I want it all now. Life is way too short not to live out the the dream...

I like fucking whores......I like fucking her......I do what the fuck I like....ijs.

You guys are to funny lol. Most of my clients hide it from their wives. If I were married or had a BF in the normal world I would kick his ass if I caught him lol.

The sad truth is that we're just weak people with little character, simple as that. Self control and the ability to reason are a couple of things that separate humans from apes, but we're too weak willed to use them. Before anyone gets too excited, I include myself in this group. Anyone seeing someone sexually outside the marriage is violating the sanctity of the marriage. Being married is like being pregnant...you either are or you aren't. Attempts at rationalization (i.e., we have an "open" marriage...then guess what? You're not really married.) are attempts to assuage guilt or avoid responsibility. That being said, we hobby because we like the variety and novelty of something different, and don't possess the will to avoid it. Simple as that.

The sad truth is that we're just weak people with little character, simple as that. Self control and the ability to reason are a couple of things that separate humans from apes, but we're too weak willed to use them. Before anyone gets too excited, I include myself in this group. Anyone seeing someone sexually outside the marriage is violating the sanctity of the marriage. Being married is like being pregnant...you either are or you aren't. Attempts at rationalization (i.e., we have an "open" marriage...then guess what? You're not really married.) are attempts to assuage guilt or avoid responsibility. That being said, we hobby because we like the variety and novelty of something different, and don't possess the will to avoid it. Simple as that. Originally Posted by Energy

I think that this marginalizes those who do have these kinds of relationships. You can't define the level of responsibility or commitment that anyone here has for their spouse. It's my belief that some of those "open" marriages that you say doesn't exist may very well hold more water than alot of lackluster traditional marriages. It's personally my belief that it is more important to be emotionally faithful than physically, but I digress, the topic is on cheaters.

Sexless marriages happen.

Sexless marriages happen. Originally Posted by pyramider

Many end that way....or get that way before they end.

The sad truth is that we're just weak people with little character, simple as that. Self control and the ability to reason are a couple of things that separate humans from apes, but we're too weak willed to use them. Before anyone gets too excited, I include myself in this group. Anyone seeing someone sexually outside the marriage is violating the sanctity of the marriage. Being married is like being pregnant...you either are or you aren't. Attempts at rationalization (i.e., we have an "open" marriage...then guess what? You're not really married.) are attempts to assuage guilt or avoid responsibility. That being said, we hobby because we like the variety and novelty of something different, and don't possess the will to avoid it. Simple as that. Originally Posted by Energy

Based on some of the comments posted earlier.....one could ask the question whether a traditional monogamous marriage is natural?

I enjoy fucking wives and SO's.

I like fucking whores Originally Posted by dearhunter

Me too, and their So's. I'm a freak like that.