I've recently discovered that I'm not the dominant I thought I was. I'm actually quite submissive and absolutely love being topped. I've been getting topped once a week. This past weekend was the most intense so far and I've got so many bruises. I am proud of them yet how can I provide if I want to continue getting topped each week. I got an expensive bruise cream but it's either not working or the bruises would be 10x worse without it. I love being topped and honestly don't want to give it up. I'm thinking about only hobbying one week out of the month so it gives me plenty of time to get topped a few times and heal.
My favorite so far is the flogger and whip. I can orgasm just from that. Not too much of a fan of the paddle but I can handle it. I enjoy seeing how much pain I can take although typically near the end of a scene I'm so amped up with adrenaline that I stop feeling pain and only feel waves of pleasure. I've also done hot wax (very relaxing).
This weekend was amazing. I have to remember that I can't talk about it to my vanilla friends. I was tied up and dangling from the ceiling. I was so aroused near the end that my thong was soaked. I was in complete subspace. Ahhh the memories.....
Any tips or tricks on aftercare for bruises? Any other masochist providers?
Thank you!
Malaya