I'll trade my DFW lawyer services for your TV

ShysterJon's Avatar
I'm an established, very competent attorney who's practiced law in Texas for more than 28 years. I primarily do criminal defense and civil litigation. (I do NOT do divorces, child support, or child custody cases.) I've handled thousands of cases involving hobbyists and providers.

I will trade my services for your 40" or larger LCD or plasma TV. We will mutually agree on the number of hours I will work based on the value of the TV.

Please PM me here.
Brooke Wilde's Avatar
I wish I was in Dallas. Someone is going to get a great deal!
ShysterJon's Avatar
Come to Dallas and commit a crime. It'll be worth it, I promise. Haha.
Dear Jon,

I'd like to have a lawyer on retainer, but I don't have a TV. Would you like to learn what it means to be a Sensual Virtuoso? I am an adult sex educator, and I can teach you how...

When I began working in this business, I was simply an escort/masseuse. But my approach evolved into something less conventional in response to the most frequently asked question of my career: "What do you like?" When I was young and first getting started, I hated that question because I didn't know the answer. I was hoping and praying to heaven, that I would find a man who knew how to thrill me like no other. When I finally did meet a man who gave me pleasure beyond measure like no other, I was reluctant to tell other men how he did it, because I didn't want to give away his sexual secrets. I felt bonded to him, and thought we had a sacred trust. We were lovers for twelve years.

Sadly, when he died, there was no reason for me to remain silent any more, and I began to give the question "What do you like?" serious consideration. As I thought about it more deeply, I realized that I had actually had several lovers in my life, with whom I would gladly reunite, if our paths ever crossed again. But only one, who knew how to take women with him to an orgasm, upon command, every time. That is what I wanted and needed, ultimately, to be fulfilled, as a woman.

I developed my curriculum, which I call “The 6 Characteristics of a Sensual Virtuoso”, by making a list of things that touched me most deeply, about the love making styles of all of my favorite lovers. And then I began teaching men how to use those techniques to become superior lovers. Do you know what it means to be a Sensual Virtuoso?

If you enroll in my curriculum, the first thing you will learn is a totally integrating mutual sensual touch technique that inspires trust and desire. I also teach superior penetration technique, tuning into the twitch, how to move through numerous positions without breaking the intimate connection, sophisticated sensual conversation skills, how to intensify passion with eye contact and synchronized breathing, ejaculation control and more. There is nowhere else that you can learn the things I am teaching.

* For those who are concerned about the legality of my work, please rest assured the advanced love-making techniques I teach can be learned while remaining fully clothed. And I am happy to do so.

I still enjoy providing elegant companionship services, if that is all someone wants. But when it comes to making love, I prefer being in relationship with a man who has already mastered the skills I am teaching. I don't believe in faking orgasms for money. It gives men the impression that something is wrong with their wives and lovers, instead of helping them develop skills that will inspire women to love sex.

I love to pamper men and make them feel wonderful, while teaching them things that will improve their personal relations. I will invite you in, then sit on the floor in front of you, take your shoes off, and rub your feet while we talk. Once I have gained an idea of who you are, where you are in your sexual development, and what you need, I will invite you to make yourself more comfortable. Then I will teach you the totally integrating tantric touch technique. You will also learn amazing things about the female anatomy, and how to give a woman genuine pleasure. In my humble opinion, most men are trying so hard to please, they are preventing women from feeling true orgasmic pleasure. It is very simple to connect in a more satisfying way. I will teach you how. My service is unique, educational, fun and pleasurable. You learn by receiving.

One of my clients told me that in 23 years of having sex with escorts, he never once had a woman clock out of the agency and spend the night with him, until he started making love the way I teach, and now they all do. Another one said he has tried making love the way I teach it with three different women, and all three of them began to cry in his arms. A third man reported that all of his friends tell him their wives have vaginal dryness and complain that sex hurts. His experience is the opposite, because he is making love the way I taught him. His wife is wet and juicy, open and wide.*I have received many other testimonials, too. Most men tell me that women express tremendous gratitude when they make love the way I recommend.

It takes about as much dedication and practice to master the advanced love-making technique I teach, as studying for one best test in martial arts. You have to practice 2-4 times per week for two months, and then the movements become a part of your kinesthetic memory. That is when the magic begins. Sex will take on an exquisite quality that most people have only dreamed of.

Would you be interested in trading for some lessons? You don't even have to take your clothes off. It is kind of like learning how to waltz, only you are not standing up when I teach you the movements...
ShysterJon's Avatar
Would you like to learn what it means to be a Sensual Virtuoso? I am an adult sex educator, and I can teach you how... Originally Posted by Deva Divine
Thanks for the offer, but I'd prefer a TV. It would be to replace one recently burgled from a young friend's abode.
How nice of her to mention what the thread was really about......

just before she used the wrong forum for her provider advertisement.


Most just offer to barter but she totally advertised her provider services but in an oh so clever way!
Way to go Deva!

Dear Jon,

I'd like to have a lawyer on retainer, but I don't have a TV. Would you like to learn what it means to be a Sensual Virtuoso? I am an adult sex educator, and I can teach you how...

When I began working in this business, I was simply an escort/masseuse. But my approach evolved into something less conventional in response to the most frequently asked question of my career: "What do you like?" When I was young and first getting started, I hated that question because I didn't know the answer. I was hoping and praying to heaven, that I would find a man who knew how to thrill me like no other. When I finally did meet a man who gave me pleasure beyond measure like no other, I was reluctant to tell other men how he did it, because I didn't want to give away his sexual secrets. I felt bonded to him, and thought we had a sacred trust. We were lovers for twelve years.

Sadly, when he died, there was no reason for me to remain silent any more, and I began to give the question "What do you like?" serious consideration. As I thought about it more deeply, I realized that I had actually had several lovers in my life, with whom I would gladly reunite, if our paths ever crossed again. But only one, who knew how to take women with him to an orgasm, upon command, every time. That is what I wanted and needed, ultimately, to be fulfilled, as a woman.

I developed my curriculum, which I call “The 6 Characteristics of a Sensual Virtuoso”, by making a list of things that touched me most deeply, about the love making styles of all of my favorite lovers. And then I began teaching men how to use those techniques to become superior lovers. Do you know what it means to be a Sensual Virtuoso?

If you enroll in my curriculum, the first thing you will learn is a totally integrating mutual sensual touch technique that inspires trust and desire. I also teach superior penetration technique, tuning into the twitch, how to move through numerous positions without breaking the intimate connection, sophisticated sensual conversation skills, how to intensify passion with eye contact and synchronized breathing, ejaculation control and more. There is nowhere else that you can learn the things I am teaching.

* For those who are concerned about the legality of my work, please rest assured the advanced love-making techniques I teach can be learned while remaining fully clothed. And I am happy to do so.

I still enjoy providing elegant companionship services, if that is all someone wants. But when it comes to making love, I prefer being in relationship with a man who has already mastered the skills I am teaching. I don't believe in faking orgasms for money. It gives men the impression that something is wrong with their wives and lovers, instead of helping them develop skills that will inspire women to love sex.

I love to pamper men and make them feel wonderful, while teaching them things that will improve their personal relations. I will invite you in, then sit on the floor in front of you, take your shoes off, and rub your feet while we talk. Once I have gained an idea of who you are, where you are in your sexual development, and what you need, I will invite you to make yourself more comfortable. Then I will teach you the totally integrating tantric touch technique. You will also learn amazing things about the female anatomy, and how to give a woman genuine pleasure. In my humble opinion, most men are trying so hard to please, they are preventing women from feeling true orgasmic pleasure. It is very simple to connect in a more satisfying way. I will teach you how. My service is unique, educational, fun and pleasurable. You learn by receiving.

One of my clients told me that in 23 years of having sex with escorts, he never once had a woman clock out of the agency and spend the night with him, until he started making love the way I teach, and now they all do. Another one said he has tried making love the way I teach it with three different women, and all three of them began to cry in his arms. A third man reported that all of his friends tell him their wives have vaginal dryness and complain that sex hurts. His experience is the opposite, because he is making love the way I taught him. His wife is wet and juicy, open and wide.*I have received many other testimonials, too. Most men tell me that women express tremendous gratitude when they make love the way I recommend.

It takes about as much dedication and practice to master the advanced love-making technique I teach, as studying for one best test in martial arts. You have to practice 2-4 times per week for two months, and then the movements become a part of your kinesthetic memory. That is when the magic begins. Sex will take on an exquisite quality that most people have only dreamed of.

Would you be interested in trading for some lessons? You don't even have to take your clothes off. It is kind of like learning how to waltz, only you are not standing up when I teach you the movements... Originally Posted by Deva Divine
ShysterJon's Avatar
I'm still looking for a TV. Please PM me if you're interested. Thanks.
KittyLamour's Avatar
How nice of her to mention what the thread was really about......

just before she used the wrong forum for her provider advertisement.


Most just offer to barter but she totally advertised her provider services but in an oh so clever way!
Way to go Deva! Originally Posted by Tantalizing Tia
Yeah, but she defeated her purpose by making it as long as a novel, most guys don't have that great of an attention span. lol

Shyster,
I may go buy a tv for you because that is a great deal!
ShysterJon's Avatar
Shyster,
I may go buy a tv for you because that is a great deal! Originally Posted by mercianna
I replied to your PM.
Yeah, but she defeated her purpose by making it as long as a novel, most guys don't have that great of an attention span. lol

Shyster,
I may go buy a tv for you because that is a great deal! Originally Posted by mercianna
mercianna smart move

Shyster enjoy
colonburns's Avatar
What an incredibly strange thread
mirandalee's Avatar
Why not just but a TV if your an attorney dont they make good money..
SofaKingFun's Avatar
I'm guessing because a barter arrangement would be a better deal all around...especially since this tv is going to be for a friend of his whose tv had been stolen?

Just speculation on my part...but I'll bet that I'm close.

.

.


chipper's Avatar
He got his TV. Doesn't need another. This one is closed at request of OP.