While You Were Sleeping

The "Masturbation" thread got me thinking:

There is a class of porn, where the woman is sleeping and generally, men will 'take advantage' of said woman. Obviously, unless drugged in some way, most women would wake up before any form of penetration, but for the sake of discussion, let us suspend our disbelief.

I have to admit, that the concept turns me on, despite the somewhat 'rapey' vibe that it projects. I also enjoy videos where the roles are reversed (in fact, I find these the most erotic). This leads me to believe that it simply has to do with surrender of power... as opposed to just wanting to sleep with a semi- unconscious woman (sounds so much worse when I put it that way).

I, myself, have been with a woman who would, more or less, molest me in my sleep. Usually I would awaken, with much delight, but I've been told there were times when I became erect, busted a nut and never even came out of deep sleep. I never felt 'violated' at any point, but I wonder if my fascination stems from these encounters.

None the less, I was curious as to what the ladies think of this 'fetish' (not sure what to call it) and if they've ever had requests to feign sleep while being fondled and so forth?

Is this just straight out creepy... should I seek counseling... or does every man have this desire at some point? Despite my openness when it comes to sex, this is a topic I am reluctant to bring up among friends, so I figured: why not ask here and see what comes up.

Also, I hope this doesn't put me on some kind of Black-List O_O

I know for me personally I want both parties awake and aware of whats going on.. Sex with someone thats asleep or not aware of what is going on to me is kinda a turn off. I want the person alert and wanting to play with me and if they werent it would seem as though im forcing them to do something that there not willing to do. I mean fucking a guy thats passed out doesnt get me hot and bothered.. I want the stimulation, the touching and the kissing whats the fun in that if hes passed out laying there.

The sleepy sex thing falls pretty straight into a fetish. I don't think it's a harmful one unless you act on it in a "rapey" non-consentual sorta way. Fetishes are not bad, despite media portrayal, and many many many of them are very mainstream (big boobs, for instance).

I dated (well, not really dated, but we would end up in bed together a lot) a girl in college that was really into getting started on me while I slept. Many times I would wake up to find her going to town on me, or even bouncing up and down on me a few times. I don't think there were instances where I didn't wake up though.

For me, a huge part of the enjoyment is the reaction/pleasure of the partner, so while I can see starting something up with someone who is asleep, I think one of the first goals would be to do enough to wake her up .

Trust me, your fetish is mild and not anything to worry over! As long as their is consent who cares. Society has embedded these sexual norms, and shoves guilt down our throats when we deviate. There is new movie out called Sleeping Beauty, I believe, that is based on that very same fetish. It must not be that uncommon

Ann Rice wrote a book..... "The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty".. pretty hot.

I've played like that a few times (diff scenarios) w/ some good friends of mine... its amazingly hot to be woken up to something already in process!!! I'm not usually the first to wake up, but would love to try waking a partner up in the same naughty fashion sometime too =-)

I have had 3 S.O.'s that I either did this with, or discussed it as a fantasy.

Two of them were absolutely thrilled by it, loving waking up with me providing the downstairs kiss. Led to very enjoyable love making and it was that much MORE intense since it was somewhat taboo'ish. Fun for everyone.

The only request I was told was not to do it just before wake up time...so...at 0200 or 0330 it was great, but just before that 0600 alarm goes off, not the way to start the day early.

Wake up to oral, have mad sex, fall asleep wrapped back up and then try to ignore the alarm in the morning.

The 3rd SO shot herself in the foot on this one. She somewhat freaked and squealed 'No No No' when I talked to her about it as a fantasy. I never did this with her, but come 1 year after we broke up and were talking about stuff, she mentioned that she was disappointed I had never woken her up by going down on her. When I reminded her of her 'reaction' to the idea, she said 'Well good girls are not supposed to LIKE THAT'. Her loss...mine too...

Not a fan of doing a sleepy girl unless she stated way ahead of time that she enjoys waking up to a man pleasuring her in any particular way. However, I love the thought of that happening to me. Years ago, my wife came home drunk from a late night outing with her girlfriends. She mounted me while I was just semi conscious. One of the few times the sex with her was great.

I had a girlfriend who liked to wake me up with a handjob. I miss her.

Had several women wake me with the a BJ and one who was having her way with me. No complaints here - any women interested in waking me up?

My ex civie bf years ago was really into that- waking him up with a BJ instead of an alarm clock was like his favorite thing in the world literally. I think he valued it more than food, air or shleter. Then again he was only 20 at the time so he was always in the mood no matter what was going on.

I think it's fine but I would only want someone to do it with me if they are actually skilled in that arena...being awoke to crappy cunnilingus would prolly just make me feel a bit awkward since I'd prefer to have them stop so I can go back to sleep but wouldn't wanna hurt their feelings since they were making an effort.

Let me start off by saying I appreciate all the replies. I was worried that I didn't word it right and came off as some kind of window-to-window slumber rapist who waits for sleeping women to yawn in their sleep or something.

I'm still not sure if I'd consider it a fetish, as I've never actually requested it before -- nor do I need it to get-off; however, as I mentioned: I've been on the receiving end of it and often wondered why the idea was such a turn on to me. I also hoped that it wasn't that uncommon or a morbid sign of some kind.

I though Britttany_Love's response was interesting. I never gave it much thought, but I suppose women tend to be more mentally stimulated during sex, while men lean more towards the visual side; so I can see how women might share the viewpoint of: I don't get it.

As for the male responses: It seems fair to say that men love the idea of being pulled out of sleep by a woman's desire. I'm actually a little surprised that 5 (out of 10) responses had to do with similar experiences. I guess women can molest with the best of them.

I also enjoyed Scarlett Rossi's point of view, along with the use of Sleeping Beauty as a comparison -- I will never see that movie the same way again. I grew-up on Disney movies though, and sadly, they probably did affect me on some kind of subconscious, sexual level... but that's another topic all together.

I think it's fine but I would only want someone to do it with me if they are actually skilled in that arena...being awoke to crappy cunnilingus would prolly just make me feel a bit awkward since I'd prefer to have them stop so I can go back to sleep but wouldn't wanna hurt their feelings since they were making an effort. Originally Posted by Reya Sunshine

I didn't see your post earlier, but I'm glad you brought this up. I was always terrified to ever try and wake a woman from her sleep in any way. I have accidentally waken my SO's in the past and I don't care how sweet or loving they are during the day... if their sleep is disturbed, it's like another person.

The idea of trying to wake a chick with oral, only to have her say, "The hell? Do you know what time it is? For fuck's sake... you couldn't wait until tomorrow? Really? You're not even doing it right so you fail on both counts. I'm going back to bed... oh, and we're through by the way."

I doubt it would be that dramatic, but to a guy, she could say, "Honey... I'm not up for it right now. I'll make it up to you tomorrow, but right now I just want to sleep", and we'd still hear the first version lol.

Well then, I guess your only choice is to become so skilled at eating a girl out that she will always be grateful despite the late night awakening.

Ya know, practice makes perfect and you should never give up on your dreams...IJS.

I didn't see your post earlier, but I'm glad you brought this up. I was always terrified to ever try and wake a woman from her sleep in any way. I have accidentally waken my SO's in the past and I don't care how sweet or loving they are during the day... if their sleep is disturbed, it's like another person.

The idea of trying to wake a chick with oral, only to have her say, "The hell? Do you know what time it is? For fuck's sake... you couldn't wait until tomorrow? Really? You're not even doing it right so you fail on both counts. I'm going back to bed... oh, and we're through by the way."

I doubt it would be that dramatic, but to a guy, she could say, "Honey... I'm not up for it right now. I'll make it up to you tomorrow, but right now I just want to sleep", and we'd still hear the first version lol. Originally Posted by GRIN OF SIN