HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Maya's Avatar
  • Maya
  • 07-29-2010, 04:03 PM
Hey Its MAYA, I need some help I'm really new to the business and not really sure how all this works????????????
I have been getting some PM'S but this guy refuses to give me any information on who he has seen in the last 90 days. I need to know something about the guy, he said it's not right to be passing information like that. Is it? To be honest I thought that would be how it all works, I mean without that information how do we know who is who right. Someone please HELP!!!!! I'm just so confused
nuglet's Avatar
Howdy Maam;
the short answer? WALK AWAY@@!@!!
Your thoughts are exactly on target, rest assured you wouldn't be losing a thing by letting this one pass on by. Especially with the things that have happened to a couple of local lovelies lately.
playingnthedark's Avatar
I have to agree with Nuglet...............let that one go. Sounds like you are having a bad feeling about him. Its a WARNING! Dont see him.
nawtynatalie's Avatar
It's probably a good idea, to just leave him alone. That's how it should work normally, There shouldn't be a problem offering up that information. Follow your instinct...
Be safe!
Beagle's Avatar
You're on track on how things should work. I'd be highly suspicious of someone not willing to divulge that information since that is how everyone else operates around here. If he has not seen anyone in the past 90 days and does not have a p411 or other verification accounts, he should be upfront about it and let the lady decide if she would still see him.

If you are not newbie friendly, you can just let him know that he can come back when he's been verified by another lady, assuming that was why he wasn't willing to divulge that information in the first place.
rrrabbit's Avatar
In addition, when u receive emails from reference providers verifying the client, be sure to look at the full email header.

Spoofing an email address takes 2 seconds.

If you don't understand, talk to a computer savvy person that you trust and ask what a "full email" header means, and have them show you what to look for.
Elephant's Avatar
Pics?
Big RED Flag there! Know what I'm sayin.
Hottassamelia's Avatar
THIS TIME, I agree with nuglet.
Us girls,we try to stick together and MOST of us have no issues with other girls screening ..keeps us all safe...so it sounds like he just doesnt have any ref's or he's up to no good.
Its not worth it.
I promise.
I'm just sayin...
runswithscissors's Avatar
Maya; lots of good information for you from everyone... Trust you instincts and ask for help.

We may fight like cats and dogs sometimes, but we tend to help each other and look out for each other; guys and girls alike.

A true ECCIE gentleman would give you any information you or any other provider asks for. If they do not; trust your instincts and walk away. A polite no thank you can save you some worry.
  • Paven
  • 07-29-2010, 10:22 PM
Not all money is good money, stay safe sistah!
Carl's Avatar
  • Carl
  • 07-29-2010, 10:27 PM
Basically, the guy is refusing to provide references (which is standard screening in the hobby) and giving you attitude about it on top of that. The most likely reason is that he doesn't have references because he's burned his bridges in some way with the providers he's already seen, so he's trying to buffalo you into thinking you're wrong for asking for them. Don't be the next burned bridge. There's been a lot of jackholes out there lately, scamming and even assaulting providers. And a little over a year ago, one nutjob even killed a provider here in Austin.

http://www.myfoxaustin.com/dpp/news/..._S_Austin_Body


I hear the guy goes to trial soon.
Whispers's Avatar
A true ECCIE gentleman would give you any information you or any other provider asks for.

I'm going to disagree with you on that. Whether or not a guy wants to provide a "provider" with any information she asks for has no bearing whatsoever with whether or not he is a gentleman. Some of us simply do not screen. The fact that we choose to keep our personal information private has no bearing on what kind of persons we are.

If they do not; trust your instincts and walk away. A polite no thank you can save you some worry. Originally Posted by runswithscissors


I agree..... The lady can run her business any way she sees fit and can say no thank-you to anyone she feels uncomfortable about seeing.
shaft.drive's Avatar
I have been getting some PM'S but this guy refuses to give me any information on who he has seen in the last 90 days. Originally Posted by Maya
go by your rules; you made them for a reason
PM the moderators
GneissGuy's Avatar
It's entirely possible he's a nice guy who is just being cautious. Caution is a good thing.

Walk away anyway.

Whenever something makes you uncomfortable, walk away. Don't stress out over it, don't berate him, just politely decline.

As you get more experience, you may get a better idea about where the risks are. Just be careful that you don't simply become careless as you become more experienced. We humans tend to get comfortable with the risks we decide to take. Unfortunately, we tend to unconsciously keep accepting more and more risks as we keep getting away with risks. Sometimes we eventually find ourselves skating too close to the edge.

Lots of ladies do require references and do all right. It may cost them some business, but it probably ads a degree of safety. Just remember, good references are no guarantee.

Re: references.

Always thank the lady who sends you a reference through some known good e-mail address or PM system. That way if a guy fakes a reference, the lady in question has a chance to tell you that it's a phony reference.