Need Advice ASAP Date this tonight!

  • DeeFL
  • 04-02-2012, 01:47 PM
I do things a bit different than most I guess being we have an actual “date”. Meaning we must have dinner, drinks, appetizers, something! etc ……. I have been doing this on and off for quite some time with ZERO issue. I always check them out to the best of my ability that is. ( That being said now I know there are more things that I could /should be doing). I have a gentleman I am meeting for dinner TONIGHT in a public restaurant of his choosing near his home. But my concern is and again after reading this board all day…….sigh, he also lives a few blocks from the police station! So either I am being paranoid (as I said, I have learned a lot) from reading this site or is this red flag?

We spoke on the phone last night and he seemed very quiet and asked me very few questions. I asked him what he did for a living and he was a bit vague. Owed a lot of businesses, I goggled his number and did find that it lead me to about 10 different things he has for sale, real-estate properties etc… all of the add’s did indicate that he does indeed live in the same area of where we are to meet tonight.

What do you think?
Sweet N Little's Avatar
Just change the restaurant, tell him your really in the mood for "Chinese" etc, and see how he reacts.
40F Cougar's Avatar
I do things a bit different than most I guess being we have an actual “date”. Meaning we must have dinner, drinks, appetizers, something! etc ……. I have been doing this on and off for quite some time with ZERO issue. I always check them out to the best of my ability that is. ( That being said now I know there are more things that I could /should be doing). I have a gentleman I am meeting for dinner TONIGHT in a public restaurant of his choosing near his home. But my concern is and again after reading this board all day…….sigh, he also lives a few blocks from the police station! So either I am being paranoid (as I said, I have learned a lot) from reading this site or is this red flag?

We spoke on the phone last night and he seemed very quiet and asked me very few questions. I asked him what he did for a living and he was a bit vague. Owed a lot of businesses, I goggled his number and did find that it lead me to about 10 different things he has for sale, real-estate properties etc… all of the add’s did indicate that he does indeed live in the same area of where we are to meet tonight.

What do you think? Originally Posted by DeeFL

Hmm I wouldn't think LE would go through the trouble of putting fake for sale ads up, but you never know?
You can also check out the number on www.verifyhim.com they will give you some free credits. I paid for a quarter of www.spokeo.com. I prefer verifyhim I am thinking of paying for a year with them.
  • anita
  • 04-02-2012, 02:37 PM
It has to be safer to live near the police station. Ijs. But I suggest at this point that you follow your instinct.
As a hobbyist...better safe than sorry. Cancel. If he's still interested, he'll be back. And by that time, you will have been better able to research him. 2 hrs ain't much time. ijs
Just change the restaurant, tell him your really in the mood for "Chinese" etc, and see how he reacts. Originally Posted by Sweet N Little
My thoughts exactly, SNL.
I understand your reasons for having second thoughts. I can assure you that the horror stories you read on the boards are not an accurate depiction of this world if you conduct yourself in a safe, smart, and professional manner. From your OP, it seems as if you may have been pretty confident in the way you've worked and kept yourself safe before you started browsing the forums. Ask yourself, are you having second thoughts because your intuition is truly reading a potentially bad situation? Or, is this feeling stemming from a warped perception you've gained by looking through someone else's eyes when reading THEIR particular story? If it's the first, then it isn't even worth chancing. No amount of $$ is worth rising your freedom. However, if you think you really are just being a little paranoid, I agree that changing the location may give you a little peace of mind. Besides, if you get there and that feeling won't subside, FOLLOW YOUR INSTINCTS, you still have a chance to get out of the situation (after you've had a full dinner and cocktails, of course ). There is absolutely nothing illegal about having dinner with someone.
As a hobbyist...better safe than sorry. Cancel. If he's still interested, he'll be back. And by that time, you will have been better able to research him. 2 hrs ain't much time. ijs Originally Posted by charlestudor2005
No, 2 hours isn't much time, for SOME, maybe. But, for OTHERS, it's actually more than enough if you're given the proper information and know what to do with it.
Still Looking's Avatar
Hummmmm Free dinner? When did that become illegal? Go have fun. You might make a new friend!
whitechocolate's Avatar
In my opinion, you are being way overly paranoid. Most LE dont live close to the station. If he were LE, where you eat or he lives will make no difference anyway. I agree, go enjoy yourself
  • DeeFL
  • 04-02-2012, 03:46 PM
Thanks everyone for the input. At this point I have not yet decided if I will go or not. I do think for the most part I am beig paronoid from readin the boards here as one sugessted. I will tune in tomorrow and let ya'll know what occured with way. Thanks so very much again and I look forward to learning more form everyone here )
No, 2 hours isn't much time, for SOME, maybe. But, for OTHERS, it's actually more than enough if you're given the proper information and know what to do with it.
Originally Posted by Lovelyelle_01
In my experience, ladies don't get back to me for days. I just figured 2 hours was nearly impossible.

Of course, my experiences are very few and very far between. I grow old waiting on call backs.
whitechocolate's Avatar
I wouldnt worry even he was taking you to the Police Officers Grill inside the station. You would probably leave with a few more new clients
CJ7's Avatar
  • CJ7
  • 04-02-2012, 05:14 PM
if he wears a nice suit, his tie doesnt clash with his shirt/suit, and his shoes are polished to a brilliant shine, he isnt a cop.

ForbiddenFriend1's Avatar
I'm with Still Looking....there is nothing illegal about meeting someone for dinner. I too have made it mandatory to meet for dinner and/or drinks before hand. Not only is it a great way to break the ice and feel more comfortable with a person it also allows both parties to make sure they want to spend BCD time together.....As for LE...they usually won't waste their time having dinner and going thru the niceties.
Good Luck and let us know how it turns out...hope you meet a wonderful man who becomes a regular for you.
xoxoxo
B.Wayne's Avatar
I agree with LY. you could just be letting the boards get to you and being a little paranoid, and looking for things that are not there. I've been there. To a lesser woman it could have cost me a friendship, but she is awsome and very patient, empathetic, kind, sweet, and genuine and didn't hold anything against me many others would have told me to take a hike long ago. For that I trust her and do not doubt her and I always appricate her. So go have dinner, like most have already said, its not illegal to have dinner.