Funniest moments

Have you ever had a date that something very odd and fuuny ever happened...hopefully not where someone got seriously hurt....

I had a multiple queefs during a session?

..yeah. It was around the holidays last year and I treaveld to meet a girl at a hotel. I arrived the night before and once I checked in to the hotel,I just didn't agree with it so I slept the night and changed hotels the next morning. I got out of the shower and was suprprised there was a text message from her. I got even more excited when she called as I was getting dressed and collecting my stuff to take to the other hotel. I got checked out and was still talking to her on the phone having an awsome converstation, got checked into the new hotel and then she told me she was getting me a christmas present. I had planned ahead to give her a special holiday gift....cash, and a decent amount of it. During this converstation I realized I left the cash and my keys to my home at the other hotel. what can I say, I got distracted. So im on the phone with her still and trying to play it cool, and in my mind im going crazy hoping her present hasnt been stolen. I race back to the old hotel we were to meet at and tell the lobby guy I left my keys. we got to the room and the cleaning ladies were already out of the room I asked them if they found anything in the room. I guess they did not speak good english because all I got from them was blank stares. I said "keys" and then they had a cup full of keys that people had left and I found my house keys...ok great what about the money? well the problem is I only bring enough cash for the girl im talking about. Other than that i bring a credit card in case my wallet gets stolen I can cancel the card easy, my bank is not a bank they have where she is from. So the night before I hid the money. well my sense started returning to me and I remembered that I hid it the night before. I must have hid it pretty damn well because I went over to the hiding spot and...it was still there...haha I laughed with relief and the crises was averted. I told her on the phone what happend but did not tell her thats all the cash I bring...she does not take credit cards.. She was like, "would you have freaked out." and I was like ummm yeah just a little. She was so nice she said she would have helped me out anyway and I told her I would never ask her to do that...so she got her gift and I got a memory to last a lifetime. I definately got the better end for sure.

Interestingly enough something kind of similar happend to me when I went to Las Vegas. luckily some good person turned in my planner that had ALL of my credit cards, 2k in cash and my DL. Nothing was missing when I went to the car rental clerk and asked if anyone had turned in a brown planner. I did not expect that to happen. I have been lucky...not looking for a third times's the charm situation either. whew.

The bed broke



obviously not my bed lol

Was seeing a provider friend of mine OTC one evening, didn't know where we was, pretty messed up, and found this karoke bar. We walk in and DAYUM it was a Gay Bar with the Village People in it singing YMCA! We said WTF and partied with them!

I was meeting a provider I had seen a few times before. She called and said she was running late. When we finally met, she said she was late because she had to get some condoms, and she couldn't find her usual brand, so she just grabbed whatever they had. No prob. Anyways, we started having our usual great session, and time came to apply the cover. So we are going at it, and going through a number of different positions and I'm realizing that it is taking quite a while for me to finish. Longer than usual... A lot longer.... Then, I notice that little Doc is kind of losing interest. I'm wondering wtf? Then it dawns on me. We get the package the condoms came in and realize that they are the ones for guys who have a problem with not being able to last. Not exactly a problem I have. My dick was totally numb! We definitely had a good laugh about this one.
So, anyway, since these are the only covers we had, she decides to finish me with a BBBJ. So we get things going again, and just when I am starting to really get into it again, she stops. Again, I'm wondering what is going on, when she says, "I can'th feel my moufth!". Apparently whatever is on the condom was also anesthetizing her mouth! So, I'm thinking perfect opportunity to practice those deep throat techniques, but no.... Anyway, a little soap and water and we were able to achieve a satisfactory conclusion to the afternoon.
It was pretty funny.

The bed broke



obviously not my bed lol Originally Posted by Sweet N Little

Broke mine twice. New Bed now!!!!

YES! But a vanilla date with a friend...trying to get to a swingers party...went to the wrong house...also a party going...hahaha...not that kind of party.....TFF. I was dressed in "slut-wear" and he gave them our donation....hahaha..we asked for the host by name...they had no clue who we were asking for...we were a couple of blocks away from the real party.