Just how safe is "hobbying"?

airplanedriver88's Avatar
Just a question for all you guys and ladies out there.. I would love to hear from you ladies, but the guys input is helpful as well...

So.. I am a guy with a SO.. I enjoy the spice of variety shall we say.. However, I very much wish to remain safe.. So, I practice very safe sex with whom I choose to see. I refuse to do DATY on a provider, and it is my preference that I only receive CBJ's. Deal killers for many of you guys, I know. But I would like to hear from the gents out there that play it safe life I do.. As if anyone would admit to catching anything on here, but.. In the interest of information... please be forthright. Details not needed... But only if you have had a "bad experience" that you will regret forever.

Ladies... What are your thoughts? You all seems to be at the highest amount of risk. What are your thoughts on the possibilities of catching something from someone and then passing it on to others?

I suspect that most of everyone here plays safe, but there are still the chances.. Those chances are what keeps me from indulging from time to time.

Flame away at me if you want.. But I jjust wanted to gather an opinion from those here..

Thanks..

AP
Htowner's Avatar
No flaming here. You do what you want to the extent that you want .
It is your choice to avoid certain activities. However there are a multitude of things such as HPVs , warts and so forth that you can still take home with all of that limitations.
You have two choices:
Do what you want and if infected, live with it.
Do what you have been doing and if infected anyway, live with that too.
There are always risks associated with the hobby even if you AVOID the obvious: BBFS, DATY, uncovered French, "Rimming", TS (table shower), Jacuzzi/Hot tub, DFK, LFK, etc. Even if you do ALL activities covered, you still will NOT eliminate ALL risks. Each one of us is solely responsible for our own health and safety. I avoid providers that do BBFS or other "unsafe", "questionable" activities (like uncovered Greek). There were numerous discussions on the old P Board about risks associated with the hobby.

We all take calculated risks - minimizing risks to the level that is "acceptable". That's why you (both parties) have to pay "attention" to a person's conditions - any "unusual" blisters around certain areas for example - lips, mouth, genitals, etc. For example you can catch HPV or herpes from an infected person at the "wrong" time when the person is most infectious - even if it is a CBJ - especially if the infected area(s) come(s) into contact with certain area(s). Say she DT you in a CBJ and her infected saliva "drips" onto your privies, or you are infected and while doing DT CBJ, she "touches" or "licks" your "base" or "sack", she might get infected.

I am not a doctor, and that is just what I gather from what I read, heard, or seen from the years of hobbying. Hope I have not scared you away from the hobby. Regular anonymous medical checkups for STDs - say, once every 6 months (minimum) should do, or when you suspect something is wrong. DO NOT wait till your SO catches something from you - you will have a lot of explaining to do...

Just my $0.02 worth.
CivilBarrister's Avatar
Interesting
simpleton's Avatar
Dude do everyone a favor and go play checkers. Save your soap box for trying to save the whales.
Combustion's Avatar
Theres always some risk, if you cant accept any this isnt for you.

juan2fork's Avatar
Hell, eating spinach comes with risks. Live with the level of risk that you can accept.
will the opinion you gather here some how influence you to change? probably not, so whats the point really..

and why the hell does everyone keep associating safety i.e the possibility of catching something with PAYING FOR IT.. the risk is still there if you cheat on your SO with girls you don't pay..

minimize your risk, don't minimize your risk.. if you truly are worried about it, you would remain faithful to your wife and live with it, but you don't, so your not and thus here we are with the question....

of course.. crabs and herpes condoms don't always prevent.. since crabs and herpes are not just found on the shaft and/or vagina.. besides.. if your really that worried, do you really wanna bet your life on a thin piece of plastic..if in fact you are truly that paranoid ?
ThatManFromTexas's Avatar
AirplaneDriver... the problem with determining the risk ratio for your question is the infinite number of variables .

Which is riskier... having protected sex with a provider or unprotected sex with an ex who is also having unprotected sex with one or more of her "friends with benefits"... who are also having unprotected sex with their girlfriends?

Which is riskier... having protected sex with a provider or unprotected sex with your WIFE who , unknown to you , is having unprotected sex with her boss who is having unprotected sex with his wife and his girlfriend.

Unprotected sex with a provider has NO risk... if she has nothing contagious. The ONLY difficulty is ... well... how the hell do you know that. (Answer: you don't... it's one of them Known Unknowables)

The only way to be 100% safe is a daily dose of NOASSATALL. It works... but no one takes it very long...

OK... my work here is done...
seanes's Avatar
AirplaneDriver... the problem with determining the risk ratio for your question is the infinite number of variables .

Which is riskier... having protected sex with a provider or unprotected sex with an ex who is also having unprotected sex with one or more of her "friends with benefits"... who are also having unprotected sex with their girlfriends?

Which is riskier... having protected sex with a provider or unprotected sex with your WIFE who , unknown to you , is having unprotected sex with her boss who is having unprotected sex with his wife and his girlfriend.

Unprotected sex with a provider has NO risk... if she has nothing contagious. The ONLY difficulty is ... well... how the hell do you know that. (Answer: you don't... it's one of them Known Unknowables)

The only way to be 100% safe is a daily dose of NOASSATALL. It works... but no one takes it very long...

OK... my work here is done... Originally Posted by ThatManFromTexas
Excuse me for plagiarizing your line:
Originally Posted by ThatManFromTexas
Very profound... what you said... at least it did sound profound... .
carkido45's Avatar
The providers I have been with practice safe sex better than my ex's.
They don't want too catch any thing so they handle their business.
I had one provider ask me too pick-up some supplies I new what she wanted and stopped at the store.
A lot of providers are just like you airplanedriver they have SO's and there not just a spouse it's there children they have a lot lose also.
I suggest getting a FBSM with a happy ending those are pretty safe but nothing is 100%.
ThatManFromTexas's Avatar
Excuse me for plagiarizing your line: Originally Posted by seanes
No problem... I probably borrowed it from someone else.... and I only steal from the best...

The providers I have been with practice safe sex better than my ex's.
They don't want too catch any thing so they handle their business.
I had one provider ask me too pick-up some supplies I new what she wanted and stopped at the store.
A lot of providers are just like you airplanedriver they have SO's and there not just a spouse it's there children they have a lot lose also.
I suggest getting a FBSM with a happy ending those are pretty safe but nothing is 100%. Originally Posted by carkido45
Just don't go this joint.... http://www.eccie.net/showthread.php?t=39238
CivilBarrister's Avatar
Are you worried about catching something or being caught?
SofaKingFun's Avatar
All you can do; if you want to continue having extra-marital sex; is protect yourself the best that you can.
Each and every time that you engage, you're bucking the odds.

You might try adding this to your protection arsenal...




Now if you *really* want something to thinck about, imagine having a condom break and the gal gets pregnant. It's happened...

Happy Hobbying.




_______________________

RALPHEY BOY's Avatar
. I avoid providers that do BBFS or other "unsafe", "questionable" activities (like uncovered Greek).
please PM with those bbfs gals...


on a serious note.. I do accept the risks and rewards of the hobby.. I am more than likely going to die in a car wreck than get HIV and since I dont cheat on my SO/wife, I have little to fear...