On the subject of giving....

I feel like we don't have too many actual hobby threads in this forum and I was thinking about this the other day. Someone said to me "I know that gifts are expected" and boy, that just didn't sit right with me.

Please also note ~ In no way should this thread be construed as saying that gift giving is in any way mandatory. I am also defining gifts as actual "stuff" not tips.

Men ~ Why do you give gifts? Do you always give the same thing? One first meetings or only for regulars? How do you decide what to spend? Has anyone made you feel bad or did you feel that you didn't get great service because you didn't bring something?

Women ~ Is there such a thing as too generous? Prefer for someone to pick something off of a wishlist or to be surprised?

Tell us your thoughts!

As for me? I like surprises! I'm definitely one of those people who genuinely believes that the thought is more important than the actual thing lol. I do think that there is an upper limit to what is appropriate to spend though. If someone that I don't know very well shows up with a really pricey gift I would be uncomfortable. I think a token is sweet, but I wonder what the string is if you spend as much as my rate lol. I also want to say that some of my BEST dates have been with men who brought me nothing but a damn good time.

My life experience tells and shows me that men are not good gift givers in the first place. It is better to just go ahead and let the woman pick what she wants and not what you think she should have.

Hey I thought the Zebra striped underwear was cool? Who knew?

I would totally rock zebra striped undies! LMAO.

Actually you give a guy some flexibility in that you haven't met a 6 pack you didn't like either. Along with the Zebra underwear you are a woman for all gifts!

My life experience tells and shows me that men are not good gift givers in the first place. It is better to just go ahead and let the woman pick what she wants and not what you think she should have.

Hey I thought the Zebra striped underwear was cool? Who knew? Originally Posted by catnipdipper

See now this is what bothers me. The idea of being ungrateful for a present is retarded. I got a pair of panties once that I would never have picked out for myself but hey, they go under the jeans and once I tried them on they are super cute.

I try to find unusual candles, Chocolate covered starwberries or just a small token to show I appreciate someone allowing me to spend time with them.

MWK

I will only give a gift to a provider I know very well. I like to put some thought into gifts and I can't/wouldn't do that if I have little or no information to go on.

I've never given a gift and don't imagine I ever would. I think it's important for myself to maintain that professional distance. If I were to start giving gifts, it would start to seem too much like a gf/bf type thing and that's what I would try to avoid.

No gifts, men are usually bad shoppers anyway. Keep it a business transaction and be generous with a tip when you are left very happy.

I would totally rock zebra striped undies! LMAO. Originally Posted by Allie_Kat

Great topic. I don't do "wishlists" because they just seem like shopping lists to me. Never ask me what I want for my birthday or Christmas. I'll just give you a blank look and say "Hell, I don't know!" My family has learned not to bother asking.

One of the sweetest gifts I've ever recieved from a gentleman was a set of leather scented candles. Yes! Leather scented! I never even knew you could find leather scented anything. I had mentioned in passing to him that I loved the scent of leather. The next time he came to see me, he gave me the candles. The fact that he tucked that bit of information away, and then remembered it later was what mattered most. Needless to say, I was very touched.

I don't expect gifts, and I find it very sweet when a gentleman shows up with a little something. The best "gift" a gentleman can give is simply a nice review and a return visit. But there is no denying when someone takes the time to pick out something they think I will like, its very touching, regardless of whether its a hobbyist, family, or a friend.

I like to give Os. An O from Omahan is like a hickey from Kinnicky!

I like to give Os. Originally Posted by Omahan

+1

Otherwise, I have been known to give gifts after I get to know the lady.

But I still like the "giving O's" answer better....

I have given gifts to ladies I know well, usually at birthdays or Christmas. I try to get something that matches their taste, not necessarily mine. I don't use wish lists; if it isn't something she likes, at least she knows I took the time to think of something on my own.

I've never given gifts, mostly because 1) I wouldn't know what to give 2) I think the donation pretty much covers it. If I ever stumbled upon something I know an ATF would love and it was reasonable, then I might spring for it. Then again I'm a horrible gift giver so I'd never convince myself it was actually something she'd like lol.

I've always wanted to take a provider shopping for clothes and lingerie as a gift, but in the end it's really a gift for myself as well.