Kinky Community

I've always been curious-
With all the different social media outlets, search engines, forums, boards, posts, threads etc. etc.... How many of you are not only dabblers on this professional side but also on the lifestyle side of kink? Lifestyle as in- out in the community.

I've been on ECCIE for awhile now and have recognized a few screen names here and there that I was not AT ALL expecting but happy to see. Being well rounded is important LOL.

I see the hobbyist and the lifestyle player crossing over more and more lately. Maybe it's due to 50 Shades of Gray or kink becoming more mainstream but whatever the case..... how many of you play on both sides of the tracks?

Maitresse Renee

I would guess there is at least some crossover, though I have a feeling most people that are out in the lifestyle community are not going to advertise it here, and vice versa. There is definitely a stigma about Pro Dom/mme work in the BDSM community, and a much worse one about sensual Dom/me/provider. Kind of like the BDSM/Swinger and Swinger/Provider issues. People do it, they just don't talk about it.

(Reminds me of a joke - what's the difference between Catholics and Baptists? Catholics will say 'Hi' if they run into each other at the liquor store.)

It is a shame that there is so much judgement in all the various subcultures. Too bad people can't just say "What works for me works for me, what works for you works for you, as long as everyone gets their groove back, it's all good." and let everyone go on about their merry way.

I love the idea of kinky scenes and stuff like that, but I have read some about the "lifestyle" and I am just not sure I am down for being someone's slave 24/7 or whatnot. Not to mention the old ball and chain....I already have one master/mistress, and as much as I am sure Maitresse Renee could torture me, the old lady can make my life a living hell!

Maybe I am in a lifestyle relationship and instead of calling it Dom/sub we call it husband and wife?

I totally agree, the stigma is unfortunate. I'm out as a sub in my personal life but am sometimes cautious about letting new clients know that, I fear they may take advantage of my submissive nature.

When I do find a client in vanilla activities that expresses a kinkier side I'm overjoyed and am able to really enjoy that relationship knowing I'm in the hands of a responsible Dom.

GREAT post!


I like to wear a "leather collar" and never really gave it a though about it's meaning...I just do it cause I like the look & feel of it on my neck

Well I was at a swingers club when i commented on a ladies "collar"...she says "Thanks,I have been my husbands property for over 30 years.....he put this collar on me when we married and I have never taken it off"....she then said that she liked my collar and who was my "owner"! That got me wondering....
So I did the research and realized........"Duh,she meant she was "collared" and "his property"


I am "no man;s property".........I am not "collared".....my SO and I are partners in love & lust and all points between.....I now am careful where I wear my "collars"

I just consider myself a unique sexual character........a little sweet/a little wild/a little dirty/a little kinky.........I just love life and enjoy a few "out of the ordinary" sexual experiences!

GREAT post!

I like to wear a "leather collar" and never really gave it a though about it's meaning...I just do it cause I like the look & feel of it on my neck

Well I was at a swingers club when i commented on a ladies "collar"...she says "Thanks,I have been my husbands property for over 30 years.....he put this collar on me when we married and I have never taken it off"....she then said that she liked my collar and who was my "owner"! That got me wondering....
So I did the research and realized........"Duh,she meant she was "collared" and "his property"
I am "no man;s property".........I am not "collared".....my SO and I are partners in love & lust and all points between.....I now am careful where I wear my "collars"
I just consider myself a unique sexual character........a little sweet/a little wild/a little dirty/a little kinky.........I just love life and enjoy a few "out of the ordinary" sexual experiences! Originally Posted by DallasRain

True True.. There is another side to it, just a little off center. My ATF is "mine".. but not in a "I will run your life" type of way. Sexually, erotically, she enjoys me "owning her" and telling her what / when / who to do. We know folks that do the formal "collared" thing and they always try to lecture us about how she is "supposed" to act with her "Master". Much as the DOM world, she enjoys giving up personal responsibility for what is going on at the time, and just enjoying the moment.. I don't want a "Stepford wife", and frankly, don't care for them, but like I said... it's just a little off center and we can mix and mingle with the hard cores easily.

I guess I should call them chokers instead of collars...lol