A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.
The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see you.
Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.
Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
Dogs are excited by rough play.
Dogs don't mind if you give their offspring away.
Anyone can get a good-looking dog.
Dogs don't shop.
Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor.
A dog's disposition stays the same all month long.
Dogs never need to examine the relationship.
A dog's parents never visit.
Dogs love long car trips.
Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
Dogs like beer.
Dogs don't hate their bodies.
Dogs never criticize.
Dogs don't want to know about every other dog you ever had.
Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives.
You never have to wait for a dog. They're ready to go 24 hour a day.
Dogs have no use for flowers, cards, or jewelry.
Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public.
Dogs can't talk.
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When a dog gets old and snaps at you incessantly, you can shoot it.
