Review I corn hole'd Von Spieler - with pictures!

slubby's Avatar
Pictures added with Von's approval!

Review: I corn hole'd Von Spieler - with pictures!
Date: 10/16/2015
Provider: Von Spieler
Phone: PM him for the number.
Email Address: VonsAdirtyManWhore@Gmail.com
URL / Website: http://www.eccie.net/member.php?u=3605
City: Arlington
State: Texas
Address: 360 & Avenue K - At a dirty/seedy motel!
Appointment Type: Incall
Did the Appointment take place at the agreed-upon time?: Yes
Activities: BLS, Donkey punching, prancing around like a homo, him squealing like Ned Beatty from Deliverance. Humiliation. It was like a Saudi prince bachelor party!
Session Length: 1hr
Fee: $1 was all he was worth, that WHORE!
Hair Length and Color: His hair looks like Santa Claus.
Age: If I had to guess....70yrs old.
Smoking Status: Non-Smoker
Ethnic Background: White/Caucasian
Physical Description: I would best describe Von Spieler as.....one of those dancing bears you saw on Jungle Book or the kind you see dancing at the local Chuck-E-Cheese.

But he's more entertaining.


The Rest of the Story: So Von and I have been chatting for quite some time now, and today he finally convinced me to book a session with him. Hell, for a $1 incall, I couldn't go wrong!

He gives me the address to his dirty man-slut lair and I agree to meet at our agreed time.

It was the usual two call system. He gave me the room number, told me the door was unlocked and I was on my way. I walked in and he was already on the bed waiting for me:





"What a dirty fucking pig" I thought to myself. I noticed there were condoms and lube everywhere. Apparently, I wasn't his first appointment of the day.

No worries! I was going to get what I came for...his chocolate starfish!

I motion him over to come say hi to me, and he jumps off the bed and prances over to me:





After a few minutes of pleasantries he dives towards my cock and drops to his knees and starts tonguing my balls like it's going out of style. Making excellent eye contact the entire time.






Finally I've had enough, and suddenly, Deliverance comes on the tv in his incall. (So you know what's about to happen next...)

That's right, I bent him over, and suited up. I didn't want to go in dry, so I kept trying to find lube. I mean, he had about 10 bottles of it around his incall, but they were all empty!

Luckily, I'm a former Boy Scout, and know how to improvise. I noticed he had butter packets from a take out place he ate at earlier in the day, and used the butter to lube up his ass really good before going to pound town:







After what seemed like an eternity of fucking this hairy slore (that's a slut and a whore, for those who don't know), I donkey punched him in the back of the neck as hard as I could, so his butt hole would clench up really tight, and I was able to finish.





He seemed to really enjoy that, I highly recommend anyone else going to see him, that you do it to!

Then I got up to clean myself up (I made him lay there on the bed, or as I called it..Whore Island. In his own filth), got dressed, said our goodbyes and I strutted out the door, LIKE A BOSS!



Recommendation: You couldn't do any worse for $1!
TinMan's Avatar
He's better looking than I expected.
jimmylbob's Avatar
You gotta' purdy mouth...
Pirate6767's Avatar
Holy Crap!!!!

I have not laughed that hard since I read Von's classic review!!!

Donkey punch, gotta remember that one! :rof lmao:
cheatercheater's Avatar
Your parents will be so proud of you ! You have accomplished the unthinkable ! Lol
Joe Buck's Avatar
CaptainMastPole's Avatar
That, my friend, is some funny shit. Awesome.
sparrow1122's Avatar
Nice job! Did not know Von was a submissive bitch. Donkey punch...writing that down....
Randall Creed's Avatar
No MSOG!?!
Roflmao....i cant breathe bahahahaha that some funny shit
Where are my fucking White Knights?
Lmfao, review of the year for sure, definitely should get lifetime premium access credit for this !!
Red Slick McQuade's Avatar
Omg.....fucking hilarious!!!!!!!
I love you Von you dirty slore
Next time do the Tony Danza. Its a donkey punch, but followed by screaming out "WHO'S THE BOSS?"