Donations confusion

I’d like to get some longtime hobbyist/providers viewpoints.

The situation: An ATF provider seldom posts ads and the rates on the provider’s website seem to be different then your last meet. I find it tacky to ask a provider questions regarding donations...feels too much like bargaining. In the interest of avoiding an awkward “light envelope” situation, what is the best approach?

1) Go by the 2-3 month old ad?

2) Go by your last rate (risk the light envelope)?

3) Go by the provider’s website (20% over your last rate)?

4) Ask the provider about her rate (feels tacky)?

5) Other?


-discreetx

Hobbying is like many things.....supply/demand driven and can change often. I don't think most ladies are offended when you ask the going rate or if she's running a "blue light" special. If she is an ATF,you might even qualify for the "Frequent Fucker" locked in grandfathered rates.That can be a "win/win" for both of you.......in the end,it's still a business.

i would just ask.... this is a business transaction. since she is your ATF, you probably have a good relationship and she might reply with "silly, what u paid last time". i think it would be more tacky to leave a light envelope when u could take 3 seconds to ask.... IMO

I say ask. There should have to be no akwardness since you have already met. If the envelope is light you might risk not being able to see you ATF anymore. Or like in the Sopranos if the envelope is light you could sleep with the fishes. (just a joke people, "light envelope" was a term used a lot in the Sopranos)

Hell just ask her, she has already seen you naked.. what could be more aykward than that???

I joke, I am a joker.

LF

light in the wallet........ light in the pants?? lol im kidding man!

For clients she's never seen before, asking about money before getting screened could be in bad form. However, since she is an ATF then you have likely already been screened, so asking about her current rate shouldn't be an issue.

This whole thing is kinda funny when used with the term ATF. As I understand it, ATF is a "regular" girl, you see often as in All Time Favorite, and then add "How much to be my favorite" just seems ironic. Like how much will I have to pay you to be my friend?
I would think $ is secondary. If she's an ATF, then what does an additional $20-$40 matter? You're looking for a deal, she's looking to make a living. What if your boss came up to you and said, "Hey, you're one of my best people, I really like your work, so how about you take a 10% pay cut.... just for me?"
Just funny is all I'm sayin'....

This whole thing is kinda funny when used with the term ATF. As I understand it, ATF is a "regular" girl, you see often as in All Time Favorite, and then add "How much to be my favorite" just seems ironic. Like how much will I have to pay you to be my friend?
I would think $ is secondary. If she's an ATF, then what does an additional $20-$40 matter? You're looking for a deal, she's looking to make a living. What if your boss came up to you and said, "Hey, you're one of my best people, I really like your work, so how about you take a 10% pay cut.... just for me?"
Just funny is all I'm sayin'.... Originally Posted by nuglet

Thank you! Your comments assure me I'm not the only person to have these beliefs. A lady that has become an ATF or a "regular" demonstrates one thing:

• She excels at providing the type of experience I expect.

That's why I don't accept "special" rates for being a regular client. Why would I pay her less for providing me with a better experience than her competition in the marketplace? That doesn't make sense to me.

I'm going to provide an example of my practices. I am seeing my ATF tomorrow. I'll travel 200+ miles to see her. Due to our relationship and experience with each other, she has offered me a discounted rate (from her already discounted rate) for multi-hour appointments. After numerous debates on her offer, we came to a compromise. She provides me with an extra time that is used to take her to a nice lunch. Additionally, I give her a 25% tip and a gift.

Some may consider my philosophy and practice as over-the-top and crazy. But like Nuglet eluded to; she needs money to pay her bills ... just like I do. While goodwill is nice; it's not accepted as legal tender by the power company or grocery store.

Additionally, I know what she does for me "behind the scenes" in the hobby world that she doesn't think I know about. It a win-win for both of us.

Just ask... i know personally it never offends me. As long as your not asking "How much for a ___" We'd rather you ask than end up shorting... that makes the situation even more uncomfortable.

yep, I don't remember the last time the power company thanked me for paying them $650 - $900 per month for the last 20+ years, in fact if I'm a few days late, I get a "shame on you" letter, letting me know when my power will be cut off. So I figger they are into me for about $168,000 (at least), and I didn't even get a kiss. I asked for a discount and they offered me "Billing Equalization". So I could pay the same ridiculous amount every month instead of getting a lower bill during the Fall & Spring.
And THEY are the ultimate "PROVIDER". There is a cutie in the billing dept that I'd fuck, but then it'd be extra, no "extra time or discounted rate".. LOL
I'm just glad to have a "provider" .... as all you guys should (be glad, that is)