Loxly's Yearly Xmas Fable

RandB fan's Avatar
Stolen from last Christmas eve, I hope this years is half as funny!!!

My Yearly Xmas Fable
Yup... that time of year again.

The Holiday Fantasy of an Old Guy!

By “Loxly”

T'was a night before Christmas, unlike any before.
(For the last 10 years they’ve been quite a bore.)

The party I’d left had really gone dead.
So back to my hotel, and the mint on my bed.

I emptied the Bourbon, killed off the Gin,
And figured it was time to just settle in.

The gift Santa Sock, now empty and bare,
Lay draped on the sofa, next to the chair.

I was soon dozing off in the glare of TV,
Not noting the stocking, or the activity.

In my half-sleep I stirred then heard a faint sigh
And turning my head I opened one eye.

I glanced at my stocking, and there seemed to appear
A great pair of legs and a perfect round rear.

She had a red see-through top with white furry trim
Red stockings, garters and a thong… (Very thin!)

Adjusting her hat she spoke with a grin,
“Hope you’re not disappointed, by me dropping in.

That gag note you gave to the guy at the mall?,
WAS the real Santa. Not a fake, not at all!

But there’s no blow-up dolls, they’re all out of stock.
So Santa put ME in your big Christmas Sock.

And we’ve only an hour for some holiday fun.
That’s all there is, then I’ve got to run.

So let’s get going, I came her to please!”
And with that moved forward, and then fell to her knees.

She spoke no more words but went straight to her work.
My briefs coming down with a quick well-training jerk.

The length of my shaft she grazed light with her teeth,
Then surrounded the head with her lips, like a wreath.

As the ball on her tongue made lap after lap,
I knew in a moment that I’d soon blow my sap.

So backing away I fell into the chair
To rest and review this gift standing there.

From her twinkling eyes and luscious red lips,
My eyes wandered down to her breasts and pink nips.

Though veiled in sheer red they were not hard to see.
All firm, erect and just waiting for me.

She took off her garters and undid her top.
Stopping just for a moment to watch my jaw drop.

“You’d better get going ‘cause this night isn’t through”,
Then fingering her thong said, “You know what to do!”

From the rug on the floor and against every wall,
Cowgirl and Doggie, Yeah. We did it all!

Exhausted and drained I flopped back on the bed
The events of this night spinning ‘round in my head.

She picked up her garters and put on her top.
If I wasn’t half-dead I’d have asked her to stop.

But with a pat on my cheek and a kiss on my ear,
She started to fade and to then disappear.

I guess in the end I did get my wish.
Most times I have trouble just getting past “MISH”.

But everything “clicked” and seemed just so right.
With this very special, “Hobby” Christmas night!
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 12-18-2015, 06:21 AM

'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house....
The whole fucking family was as drunk as a louse.

Ma home from the cat house, & Dad out of jail,
Had just crawled in bed to knock off some tail...

When suddenly in the yard, there arose such a clatter,
I jumped up to see "what the fuck is the matter"?

Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Sliped on WhixxZys Cats shit, fell flat on my ass...

But what to my bloodshot eyes did appear,
But a big assed sleigh & eight wasted reindeer...

With a pudgy fat fucker stroking his dick,
I knew in a moment, the bastard was sick...

He screamed at the reindeer, and called them by name,
The last one was Rudolph he yelled as he came...

ON Ricky, ON Hobart, ON SixxZy & Looking,
Hurry cocksuckers my Kittens are Cooking...

They're home with my girlfriend, in my mind I believe,
Why would you think I'm the kind to deceive???

And into the night they flew through the crap,
As he did scream, "where the fuck is that map"?

I've many to visit, and many to haunt,
The evening is young on my pre Christmas jaunt...

Trolling you see is a full year round job,
As is stroking my dick, my fleshy round knob..

I'll visit you soon, don't you rest all in slumber,
Cause I'm bringing my stooges...one is dumb..one is dumber...



Mr Peabody's Avatar
Quite an accurate depiction toyz. Most hos wouldn't touch that slimeball with a 39.50 foot pole.
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 12-18-2015, 01:44 PM
Quite an accurate depiction toyz. Most hos wouldn't touch that slimeball with a 39.50 foot pole. Originally Posted by Mr Peabody
Thanks Mr P!

Just trying to add a bit of fun to this zombie-drama-marathon...

Now back to your regularly scheduled WhixxZy & bandles character assassination attempts....
RandB fan's Avatar
Funny shit ToyZ!!!!!

By the way, When did the whores get a raise?

See you after the Holidays, Hope you're all here. One, not so much!
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 12-18-2015, 02:52 PM
Funny shit ToyZ!!!!!

By the way, When did the whores get a raise?

See you after the Holidays, Hope you're all here. One, not so much! Originally Posted by RandB fan
Thanks Rand!

The $2? I think hes factoring in a tip?

Enjoy the Holidaze...drink some eggnog (or whatever)
RandB fan's Avatar
That's a big set of panties to get in a wad.



These are hilarious! Thanks Loxly and Toyz
Loxly's Avatar
  • Loxly
  • 12-19-2015, 04:39 PM
Actually the original was a slideshow/pictorial but never could get it to run correctly.
RandB fan's Avatar
TRY AGAIN???


Actually the original was a slideshow/pictorial but never could get it to run correctly. Originally Posted by Loxly
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 12-19-2015, 05:19 PM
Actually the original was a slideshow/pictorial but never could get it to run correctly. Originally Posted by Loxly
I wrote mine in 5 minutes sitting in the breakfast nook waiting on the coffee to brew...true story
RandB fan's Avatar
And a fine piece of work it was!!!!


now get to adding pictures or video!!!




I wrote mine in 5 minutes sitting in the breakfast nook waiting on the coffee to brew...true story Originally Posted by Toyz
Loxly's Avatar
  • Loxly
  • 12-20-2015, 11:24 PM
Managed to find one pic from the holiday story. Zasu holding the "gag note". I've been through 2 PCs since this was done so I'm not surprised that I've only found one. Oh well!

Attachment 485389
powermad's Avatar
Who is she looking at?
Person on the left or right?
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 12-21-2015, 06:58 AM
Who is she looking at?
Person on the left or right? Originally Posted by powermad
Ricky, I think shes looking at someone in the middle...maybe?