Erotic asphyxiation: Extreme or Extremely Hot

First let me say, i'm no Polly Anna, far from it, butttt, had a provider recently grab my hand and put it around her neck while I was pounding her K9. It was an extremely sexual encounter, full blown PSE, that said, this caught me slightly off guard. She was really into this and I obliged,although I treaded lightly.

Question for the board, specifically the ladies. Have you gone here and if so, is there a method one should follow for peak sexual arousal. Any sage words for a newbie in this realm. Inquiring minds want to know. Is this extreme or extremely hot? Thoughts?

For the record, not sure if i will go here again. Would have to discuss ahead of time w/ the lady to clearly define our boundaries. Thanks for your input.

L6P

I am into that and i provide it, both ways. You should google the internet on safety. I like the blood restraint aspect of it, not the breath restraint aspect. It can be dangerous if you are too hard. Wouldn`t recommend inexperienced. I mostly guide men doing that to me. Its arousing. But i would certainly not do it with everyone. and i am not sure, if i`d let myself go that far with a client in a passive way..

When a man is naturally, well aggressive and well ... acting like a man, there have been some times that I've also "guided" him to do that. Most of the time, they don't know what to do.

But men are sweet creatures, they wish to see us happy and well, then they choke us a little bit. And it's really erotic.

Kidding aside, and I wasn't really kidding , it isn't very safe. And doing this with a stranger REALLY isn't a good idea but from my perspective, well, doing activities that you shouldn't just adds to the whole experience. (I'm being a bad example, aren't I?)

There was a topic about this last year in Another Realm that was very good but this topic REALLY needs to be revisited.

I sincerely feel that because of porn, people are trying different things in the bedroom that really has little to do with BDSM but has a lot to do with experimenting. Which can, of course, be fraught with danger and bad consequences.

It's my hope that others will chime in on this even if you've chimed in before. It's a very germane topic these days.

Thanks,
Elisabeth

Hmm, based on your description, what you did was not asphyxiation, more of a control, or perhaps you were implying you would add pressure and cut off air/blood flow.

Generally speaking, asphyxiation requires that you cut off the supply of blood flowing to the brain. This can create a sense of euphoria as your brain is starved of oxygen. From what I have read, things don't get to the truly mind-altering state until the 'victim' is about to pass out from the lack of oxygen. Which puts this in the potentially dangerous zone because you are hoping that as they pass out their autonomic functions will kick in and they will breathe while they are unconscious. Though, done incorrectly this can lead to brain damage, and even death (David Carradine anyone? though his was self-inflicted).

If you are looking for a thrill, you can get away with the more common choking/hold around a throat, which can also get the endorphins pumping but is much more safer. Care shoudl be given to make sure you don't lose control and accidentally crush the windpipe, or leave some tell-tale bruising either. I don't think the ladies are too interested in explaining away bruises around their throats, unless they are into wearing large chokers or collars for a few days.

But if this is something you are interested in, their are lifestyle groups that offer classes on this. South Plains does, from time to time, have classes on choking/breath play. You can check also with NLA-Dallas to see if they have anyone offering tutoring or classes.

As a domme, I've been asked to perform that act on numerous gents and have it performed on me. I refuse to do either. Its too dangerous to do with a stranger and too many things could go wrong.

That's just me though.

As a domme, I've been asked to perform that act on numerous gents and have it performed on me. I refuse to do either. Its too dangerous to do with a stranger and too many things could go wrong.

That's just me though. Originally Posted by MsElena

You're very wise, MsElena. I've just been known to dance with the Devil on occasion.

Krunkman,

Oh ... it was breath control. You feel lightheaded and you're about to faint. Of course, you're right in the sense of having a man who is literally holding your life in your hands, well it blends into the dominant themes that are often discussed.

I think that I had better step away from this topic, people are going to get the wrong idea!!!

Hugs,
Elisabeth

As a former paramedic.... let me just say that I have been on at least 3-5 emergency calls a month where this went terribly wrong. Out of those 3-5 calls at least half were not able to be revived. The others had perm injury including brain damage (including stroke), heart damage (both from lack of oxygen), carotid artery damage and total collapse of the esophagus. Mostly it was due to the intense pleasure it brought and things got a little carried away during that heat of moment... however there were several where there was medical issues that the receiver was not aware of, like a weakened esophagus due to drinking of hard alcohol. I say, research, know ur limits.. and think of a good story to tell the medics if they should have to show up... lol

Personally, I LOVE it both ways. Very sensual!

This is a lot like any thing else in BDSM - must be consentual and must be done by actors who know well enough what they are doing so as not to cause any permanent harm. While I can't do this, I've had providers ask me to firmly hold their neck - sometimes I will, sometimes I won't and because I don't play with them enough, I never do it enough to actually cut off air flow.

I had a very experienced domme do breath play with me a long time ago and I will never do it again as it was not my cup of tea. All of this is about finding what excites us and not wasting time on what doesn't.

I have to admit I absolutely love this area of play...and always dialogue with the domme and/or provider about their level of experience, how they're going to do it and the like..also I always set up a "safe gesture" since the safe word might come out a little garbled... And I also ask myself..what the hell are you doing? Dangerous...but..oh my...and again...oh my.

---Dangerous...but..oh my...and again...oh my. Originally Posted by captnzen

I think that is the real draw to this. Most of us here, at least the guys, are risk takers. The world does not agree with our chosen hobby, and in many ways will persecute us for engaging in this hobby. (Persecution includes criminal, employment, family, friends, many forms.)

In many cases, that adrenaline high we get as risk takers is addictive, and each time we need a stronger fix. Whereas the first time, simple run of the mill sex with a stranger is enough, eventually we look for a stronger fix. Perhaps is is as our friend in Dallas, Logan does, by hitting the streets and finding that streetwalker to get the adrenaline flowing. Perhaps it is with that PSE provider we saw advertising, or that domme who puts through our paces. We each seek the adrenaline, but for some, it really takes something out there on the fringes to fill that need.

I think that is what ANOTHER REALM is all about. Just as some have the need for speed, we have a need for an excitement. No risk, no adrenaline, no relief. But the next time, it takes a little bit more...

I've had it done to me by a lover I trusted & have known for quite some time. I've also done it to a different lover I've known for a few years.
BUT, while having my partner to it to me and it was incredibly erotic.
I found it very difficult to do it to another.
It's hard to explain what I felt when I had my hands around my lovers neck. But it didn't feel as good as I would have liked, aside from the (empowerment of sorts) of bringing my partner to ecstasy.
And it was a bit much for me to take in the site of my hands squeezing his neck. As I felt fear I might cause him harm when he expressed for me to squeeze harder.

I doubt this is one pleasure I'll be partaking much of.

First let me say, i'm no Polly Anna, far from it, butttt, had a provider recently grab my hand and put it around her neck while I was pounding her K9. It was an extremely sexual encounter, full blown PSE, that said, this caught me slightly off guard. She was really into this and I obliged,although I treaded lightly.

Question for the board, specifically the ladies. Have you gone here and if so, is there a method one should follow for peak sexual arousal. Any sage words for a newbie in this realm. Inquiring minds want to know. Is this extreme or extremely hot? Thoughts?

For the record, not sure if i will go here again. Would have to discuss ahead of time w/ the lady to clearly define our boundaries. Thanks for your input.

L6P Originally Posted by latin6pack

thanks for the thoughtful responses, a lot to take in... agree, my experience was more control v. asphyxiation... the latter certainly being left for the more experienced and adventuresome... nonetheless, food for thought... thanks...

I have done this and do enjoy it highly, but I am very careful and never get to the point of them passing out.

It is a hot thing to do, and yes I dance with the Devil, to quote the Great EW....

PPE