funny or awkward times for a turn on?

so anyone have any unusual or funny times when you or she/he got turned on, and it was hard to miss?

i'll share 1 or 2 of mine after i read some of ya'lls..

In a tree stand while hunting.
The safety straps got in the way a couple times.

^^hilarious..

so for one of mine, i need to start with the backstory. i read a news article about how a female jaguar in a zoo refused to mate with a male they had brought in just for that, and so one of the zookeepers came up with a bright idea: spray the male with the cologne Obsession. after that, the female could not get enough of the male, and mating was sucessful.

so i made a mental note of that and added Obsession to my cabinet. now if i have a hot date or a girl i want to impress, that's my go to.

so in my line of work, i can't really date clients, but i can at least flirt with them. and i got a crush on one of my clients. so i went all out, as these things go lol. too small bike shorts lol, and of course Obsession, and i had a fun time flirting with my client.

same day, next appointment, my client maybe thought i was trying to hit her up even though she's not my type. first, her nipples got rock hard even though it wasn't cold. then she started blushing, and then she literally started hyperventilating like someone might during really hot cardio sex. in my mind, i was fol, but i played it with a straight face until she was finally able to cool her raging hormones down. lol.

i went all out, as these things go lol. too small bike shorts lol, and of course Obsession Originally Posted by pxmcc

Daisy Dukes & half a bottle of Obsession is what I wore last night to The Hop & I didn't get any play at all.
Infact I'm 99% certain that they charged extra drinks on my tab!!
The booty shorts & pheromones had the opposite effect for me.
On topic, I did wake up with a headache and morning wood.

^^ I go to the Hop often I would have definitely hit on you

Long times ago when my ding ding would get hard if the wind blew...
I took a gal and her mother to the lake. The mother was wearing a bikini that was revealing her good assets.
Don't remember what my gal was wearing? My gf left to the restroom and her mother and I were swimming.
We decided to get out and she needed a little help getting on the cliff bank. I pulled her up and we ended up hugging. When we separated from the frontal hug I was full mast. It showed in those Umbro shorts of the time. She started staring at my ding ding and I was watching her long nipples get hard. When yep my gf walks up and notices both of our hard ons. The instant car trip back to drop them off was rather quiet. The gal broke up with me. But 2 nights later her mother called and taught me a few things. We went out a few more times after that!
I was innocent. It was just a hug!

^^of course, blameless! and frickin epic, Winn..

the mother daughter thing could be its own hilarious thread..

Marcellus, you're only 'posed to use a quarter bottle. a half bottle is a tad too much of a good thing..

Daisy Dukes & half a bottle of Obsession is what I wore last night to The Hop & I didn't get any play at all.
Infact I'm 99% certain that they charged extra drinks on my tab!!
The booty shorts & pheromones had the opposite effect for me.
On topic, I did wake up with a headache and morning wood. Originally Posted by MarcellusWalluz

^^of course, blameless! and frickin epic, Winn..

the mother daughter thing could be its own hilarious thread.. Originally Posted by pxmcc

I wasn't gonna admit this! I never did sleep with the daughter.

I would have definitely hit on you Originally Posted by Cendell M

so one of my utrs went by Bonnie, and Fridays were our date night. she has amazing boobs, and her boobs were my first post on the Boobs Thread on oh2. her fabulous boobs still up? i have no idea since i didn't see the yellow light of how ck doesn't like his fave she-pimps called out on the carpet..

anyway, we had a fun session, started in the clawfoot, then to the bedroom, and back to the clawfoot for cleanup..

so i asked her what she was feeling for dinner, and she said mexican. i told her i knew a great place just up the street.

so as we're dressing for dinner, she tells me she's feeling adventurous, so i say sure baby sounds good, and look up.

lemme back up tho. first round in the tub,she asked me if i could shave her you know south of the border. and i told i'd never shaved anyone before besides myself, and she said no worries, just go for it.

well i didn't want to cut her, so i was going really slowly and being super careful. she says, lemme see the razor. i hand it over, and she shaves all the rest of her pubes in like 30 seconds. i'm like, dayum gurl be handy wit a blade..

anyway, i look up, and she's wearing this one piece dress thingee which has like multiple slits all over, and she's going commando and braless. and this gal has an extraordinary pair of twins, and i have to adjust my pants..

i'm like, baby, you sure you want to go out like that? maybe at least wear your thong underneath? and she's like, naw i'm good, even tho her pubes would be visible but for just having shaved everything..
so i'm a bit leery, but i'm like, ok baby. well at least you won't get too hot..

so we get to the restaurant, and i ask for a booth in the back. she sits first and i thought it might look better if she was more tucked in, so i sat next to her..

she asked me what was good, and i said the grilled jalapeno shrimp wrapped in bacon, so we ordered for 2, plus a couple of sides.

i happened to notice that Bonnie had managed to feel a bit cold or hot or something, cause she had a titty hard on to match jennifer aniston's-any dudes ever wanked off to a jennifer aniston tho?-except bonnie has bigger boobs and really pornographic nipples that kind of call out to anyone near her, Suck me please..

so i'm kinda giggling and the waitress is like trying hard not stare at Bonnie's nipples and keep a straight face..

finally we got the order in, and i'm thinking to myself, umm that was awkward, but also kinda hawt. i'd love to see Bonnie and our waitress make out, who's a pretty sexy gal herself..

so while were waiting for our food, i notice out of the corner of my eye, our waitress is talking to an important looking lady who i assumed was the manager, and i'm thinking, uh oh..

and sure enough, the manager told us there was an "attire issue", and we'd have to leave. i was like, damn i was really lookin forward to that grilled jalapeno bacon-wrapped shrimp..

so we went to cane's, and this time, we took the drive-thru..

this story is about a classmate in one of my grad programs. her name is Laura, and b/c we were in the same section, 1st year we were in all the same classes.

she was a natural blonde, tall and slim, with perky B-cup boobs.

and here was the thing. she has a permanent titty hard-on, 24/7. whenever class got boring, I'd sneak a look, and sure enough, even with a bra on, you could clearly see her smaller areola, rock-hard nipples.

so i had a question for her that i never had the guts to ask: are your nipples always rock hard because you're always sexually excited, or are your nipples rock hard even when you're not turned on?

well i never found out, even though one of my buddies got to hit that shit. then she knew everything about me, but there was still one question i had about her..