The power of ONE. The difference between having one girl and ZERO girls is infinite. That one is everything; without her, all is nothing. A man only truly needs ONE girl he finds sexy and who fucks him how he likes. But in a world with billions of women, it can seem impossible to find ONE.
With this in mind, I decided to try searching for a Sugarbaby on Tinder: a bountiful cornucopia of endless-but-impossible-to-obtain pussy. My strategy:
1) Put my age as 24 so I'll show up in the college girl's searches but hide the age; only put photos of cash - no photos of me; write a bio saying looking for a girl to spoil.
2) Pay the $25 upgrade fee for endless swipes.
3) Swipe yes to everyone.
Hundreds of matches. If I were into fatties, I'd suffocate on pussy. But I have high standards for my Sugarbaby's. About 3% of the matches get a message from me. Less than half a dozen get to texting.
This is a patient game. My first two prospects ghost after weeks of texting. My third prospect, a petite strawberry-blonde 20 who lives an hour away, takes it to Facetime. She's adorable and sexy. Works at a hotel fulltime. Has her own apartment and car. She's got legit bills and slaves away for low-wage taxable income. Prime candidate. Just my type. But can I land her? This is Tinder, not Seeking.
Weeks go by. I'm persistent. Double text. Triple text. Calls. We finally meet for dinner. She shows up wearing jeans which are 20% denim and 80% leg. Midriff and belly-button-ring exposing shirt. Faux Doc Martens. Facial piercings. I'm wearing a work suit sans jacket. We're a sartorial incongruence. But there's an instant connection. She's sweet, affectionate, punky, spunky and sexy as fuck.
We have a post-dinner promenade around her small town, hand in hand. I give her a ride to her car, and we makeout as if I wasn't more than double her age. No money given. No pressure to get a hotel. Not sure this was smart, but I promised "just dinner" so we can finally meet and I kept my word.
Weeks go by. Flake after flake. Aborted mission over and over again. I book a hotel room, and she ghosts. If I hadn't already met her in person, no way I would have believed she was real. She would text every day, or call, and offer to meet, only to then ghost. Nothing all day. Until the next day. Once again, she would text/call in the morning, offer to meet, and then ghost. Nothing. Fucking groundhogs day. Everyday. For over a month. I'm offering her $500. But she's too busy slaving away at the hotel. She even applies for a second job?? I remind myself this is a Tinder girl. Be patient.
I'm willing to drive to her ANY DAY she can meet. I'm an addict and I need to mainline her. But she's somehow ghost-fishing me: she's real, but never there.
She loses her job Tuesday. All bad things come to an end; and "badder" things begin. It's on. Immediately. Wednesday. I finish work and beeline to her town. I call ahead to find a nice hotel with vacancy. Fuck it, I'm booking it. No cancellation refund. I arrive at 8:30. We're talking/texting on the way. I'm walking this beautiful belle across the goal line. No fumbling. No bumbling. No intercepting. I'm fucking scoring!
She texts she's on her way to me as I'm standing outside the suburban-almost-rural hotel. At this exact moment, a local police office drives up, pulls up to me, puts down his window, and asks: "Have you heard any gunshots?" No... but you may hear one if she's an apparition, because an exorcism is my only way out.
The knock on the third-floor hotel-room door arrives... SHE'S HERE, IN THE FLESH! Oh, that pure feminine buttermilk flesh. The youthfulness of a petite 20-year-old girl is what Ponce de Leon should have been searching for. She's wearing black tight pants, and a black crop top. Her highlighted strawberry-blonde hair let down.
Instant kissing and she's on the bed. She's soon naked. And she's as amazing a time as I knew she would be. Nothing like the sweet nectar of a 20-year-old's hairless pussy. Her body wrapped around you as you're rapturing in her body.
Almost three hours later, my first non-Seeking SugarBaby kisses me goodbye. The high is incredible. The perennial search is completed, once again. All it takes is ONE.