Shyster John like story, or one worthy of Logan, but for me this is new terrortory
-
Last weekend my oldest daughter (AKA "Aggie Money Pit") organized a small get together at our home for some of her friends. This is no big deal, all the girls are in college now and I've known some since they were in elementary school. They're all good kids, so I didn't expect any trouble, but just to make sure I evicted my teen-aged son for the day and stayed home but out of the way.
-
The girls were having a high old time up in the game room and I was at the kitchen table with a Siamese purr-monster in my while I was watching TV & eating some crackers. Then Jane Doe comes galumphing down the stairs & into the kitchen. She's on a search-and-rescue mission for more munches. MORE?!?! "Y'all have already eaten twice your combined body weights in Doritos..." She smiles, and sits at the table across from me (blocking the TV) asking if she could talk for a moment. "Sure.." I reply (Cant see the TV anyway.)
-
When "money pit" was a High School Freshman Jane was her Drill Team Captain. They've stayed close over the years and I see Jane three or four times a year. Our past conversations have primarily consisted of "Hi Jane..." "Hi Mr. Hunter..." Our longest conversation occurred last December when I ran into her and her youngest sister (her parents had a "bonus baby" her freshman year in college) in the grocery store. And that was merely polite conversation in the check out line. So it was a surprise she wanted to "talk" but no so much that it shocked me.
-
She's in her 2nd or 3rd year at a local Juridica Ludus and is stressed over school, men (boys), and finances. Mostly finances. With the poor economy and having younger siblings in the pipeline, her folks can't support her at the level she's accustomed (that's my interpretation anyway).
-
One thing you must understand is that both my daughters are dancers, so over the years I've had a parade of nubile teen, post-teen, and young ladies through my house. I've always been professional, patriarchal, and un-tempted. But while reciting her litany of woe Jane is leaning forward on the table so her cleavage is popping out of the top of her T-shirt in a way I've seen waitresses at Hooters do. However, I keep my eyes locked on her very, very blue eyes....
-
Then she leans back and does that hair flip thing that women do which makes her perky B/C's bounce with joy and drops this line, "I guess what I need is some sugar from a happy Papi..." and I feel a foot up my pants leg...
-
BONG, BONG, BONG....
GENERAL QUARTERS, GENERAL QUARTERS, ALL HANDS MAN YOUR PANIC STATIONS!
THE TRAFFIC PATTERN IS RUN IN CIRCLES SCREAM AND SHOUT!
THIS IS NOT A DRILL
BONG, Bong, bong..
.
-
It took all my will to overcome the panic and maintain a straight poker face. I kept the conversation going asking her simple questions on her finances all the while my mind is racing...
-
"What's that against my leg, is it her?!?" Where are the cats? Oh, purr-monster is in my lap.. Where's your sister you dumb animal? Oh, she's in the cat tree... Did Jane really say what I think she said? Is she really feeling me out... Gawd she's HOT, look at those boobs, eyes - eyes. Look-at-her EYES DAMNIT!..."
-
Suddenly a call from upstairs puts Jane back on her munchie mission and I watch as that tight butt, shapely legs, and flowing strawberry blond hair bounce up the stairs. Then a drop of sweat falls from the tip of my nose onto my half eaten cracker...
-
I was in partial shock, not really sure what transpired as I questioned my memory and my sanity. I'm not some wealthy lawyer or banker, but a widowed, out of shape, pushing 50, grumpy old engineer, with three kids, two cats, a mortgage, and I drive a Focus. I make ends meet, we have enough for a rainy day, and I budget my hobby money like the stingy Scotsman of my heritage (that's another story). So my first thought is why me?
-
And eventually, in my mind, that's what settles it. I couldn't rationalize how that gorgeous creature would seek me out, even for a SugarDaddy relationship. Knowing that one of my souvenirs from my Navy days is that I can have a hard time hearing higher tones I shrugged the episode off as a middle-aged fantasy/delusion. Until...
-
I got a Facebook friend request last night from Jane. In her request was a note that, in effect, stated she can be VERY (her emphasis) friendly for the right reasons... I must have held the mouse over the accept button for an hour before I logged out & went to bed.
-
Remember, I know her family. We exchange Christmas cards. I can just see how that would play at the PTA. But she's HOT, legal, and after ME! (And my money, but what else is new?)
-
I'm at a loss, any ideas on what should I do?