Deep thoughts

I know the KC folks love some thought provoking discussion and I am here to assist!

I'm visiting another city soon and have been talking to a few ladies to narrow down my game plan. In the course of that effort, I asked the guys in the area to tell me who they might suggest that would fulfill specific desires.

I had a lady respond, and to paraphrase her response, she thinks my request for info was worthless because chemistry is what's most important and that it can differ from person to person. So, let's discuss that part!

Any of the ladies I've met will tell you that I'm polite, easy going, and not a douchebag. I enjoy friendly conversation and banter, but I'm really there for the blow jobs. I don't mean disrespect to anyone, I just find the physical pleasure higher on my priority list than building a long lasting relationship. I don't think providers are a piece of flesh and I don't treat them as such. I just don't think the importance of relationship building is important when I may not see you for a year or ever again. Variety is the spice of life! I've seen very few providers more than once, not because I thought they were incompatible with me socially, but that I can't help but wonder if there's a better blow job to be had, even if that one was fantastic.

That being said, I won't see a companion*if she's rude or otherwise incompatible with me socially just because she gives head like Bobbi Bliss.

I'm not against or judging those that do need that emotional connection, I just want to know other's perspectives and maybe determine if I'm in the minority.

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While chemistry is important, doesn't matter how great the chemistry is, if you really enjoy a BJ and someone doesn't do it very well, you likely won't see as often. They may provide other great enjoyable services, but sometimes you need a BJ.


There was a companion*I saw that was great in every way, but was a terrible kisser. It was a real turn off that the kissing was so bad, and I never went back to see her just for that reason. She was a wonderful sweet person that I enjoyed the conversation and other activities, but the kissing ended up a deal breaker for me.

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KatiforYou's Avatar
Chemistry is important for providers. It can definitely mean the difference between an okay review, and a glowing one.
  • moman
  • 06-27-2018, 11:41 AM
If you are clean, and respectful to the ladies, they will treat you right. That's what they are paid to do. But sometimes things just don't click. You won't know till you see her. As long as you treat them the way you say you do there is no reason you shouldn't get the best she can give no matter if you ever plan to see her again or not. Just my 2 cents.
Fsn57's Avatar
  • Fsn57
  • 06-27-2018, 11:52 AM
That's why reviews are important. Not only to verify the girlis legit, but what services she provides (and does that match with what I want), does she look like her pics (not 10 years, 20 lbs and 3 kids ago). I don't see a lady to have a relationship. I also think "chemistry" is over rated, a lady that is clean, friendly, professional, polite and outgoing is what I will be looking for if I'm considering a repeat visit.

staff edit: remove term not allowed-S31
KatiforYou's Avatar
That's why reviews are important. Not only to verify the provider is legit, but what services she provides (and does that match with what I want), does she look like her pics (not 10 years, 20 lbs and 3 kids ago). I don't see a lady to have a relationship. I also think "chemistry" is over rated, a lady that is clean, friendly, professional, polite and outgoing is what I will be looking for if I'm considering a repeat visit. Originally Posted by Fsn57
But that's just one persons experience. If their chemistry was off the charts then the review is going to be great. If it was just so so, even if she provided her best, the guy may feel differently.
Kati, I've seen you more than once. Would you say we have chemistry? Did it help at our first or second encounter? I enjoyed feeling comfortable with you, being able to converse about any range of subjects, but if you were moaning and groaning that I meat what the sweetest, I'd think you were full of it lol. Maybe it is the best? Haha

Something I omitted that is very important, do the ladies feel the need for chemistry?

I have a jaded (but I feel realistic) opinion of all of this because I have a very good female friend that is a professional dancer. I knew the "real" her, but saw the image she portrayed while at work. I saw that it was an integral part of her business model. There's a reason we call it IOP, and that's okay. I'm just not a fan of famery, and I'm probably a skeptic. I don't believe a lady will fall for me in the least bit, so is she doing it just to make me feel good? I appreciate the effort, but I don't know if I need it at the levels I've seen others talk about. I want to be friendly, I want to be able to carry a conversation, but I don't need her to lie.

I feel like I'm talking out of both sides of my mouth, it's not intentional.
Great topic! It shows that we are all different!
I think for women, the experience is more emotional and cerebral. For men its more physical.
Chemistry can make a good experience amazing!
Two men may have the same kissing technique, but the man you have chemistry with causes you to feel that kiss down to your toes and back again!
Its a well known science. It has to do with phermones and hormones. Helps us choose a mate that we will have best babies with!
Its an amazing thing
Suzanna, thank you for responding, I had hoped you would.

I had a terrific time with you, I found you to have a fun, up eat attitude, you're easy to talk to, down to earth, and having a drink before we moved to play time was so much fun!

Maybe I'm trying to figure out what I'm trying to say by saying it wrong a few times before I get it right.

I don't.... can't forget that this is a staff edit. It's beyond my mental capacity to do that. I can't just forget the trade off/sacrifice I've made for our time spent (which I've truly enjoyed 99% and completely found those encounters worthy) and I suppose I compare it to other business transactions in life. I'm not going to deal with a vendor who is unpleasant, regardless of what their product or price is as compared to others. If two ladies are equally enjoyable in the sack, I am going to go to the nicest one every time, as long as it doesn't seem fake.

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Maybe I've just assumed every woman has been desensitized to the whole emotional connection. Maybe I assume that, and that any "illusion" of emotion beyond friendly banter, is just an effort to earn repeat visits from a guy. Maybe I'm reaching the root of my feeling on the subject...

I wish my cock worked as hard and as often as my mind.....
DallasRain's Avatar
I strive to have a personal connection or chemistry with each of my playmates....MOST times I suceed...I am very adaptable and compatible so it is usually pretty easy for the connection or chemistry to happen....and when it does,playtime is so much more fun!
frizB's Avatar
  • frizB
  • 06-28-2018, 12:08 PM
There has to be at least decent chemistry in order for the encounter to be a good one. Don't think there's any way around that. This is generally still men and women we're talking about here, lol.
GrandNagusZek's Avatar
I have seen a few companions that were polite, clean, and offered small talk but I felt the effort. It felt sort of practiced and mechanical. The physical was terrific. But I don't repeat with those women. For me personally, I need an emotional connection if I intend to return.
Maybe I'm in denial about my desires? I have to have some ability to mentally connect, it just doesn't take priority over how well, and how long, she can keep me admiring the top of her head! Haha

I like the feedback here!
Fsn57's Avatar
  • Fsn57
  • 06-29-2018, 03:10 PM
The hobby for me is more physical. There are too many pitfalls that guys get suckered into when they start to think of it as anything more than a business arrangement. But that doesn't mean that friendly, professional, etc. are not important. I've known people who won't see a particular doctor because their personalities don't click. Same dynamics here.



But getting back to the original post, its the activities, etc. for the fee that is the driving force initially. Personality is also important. For a provider to say activities are unimportant, that its all about chemistry, is a provider I probably have no interest in seeing.