So is it like the words of an admiral, is it a trap?

spyderco75's Avatar
So I want a consensus and some advise from the ECCIE peanut gallery. Ok so my SO is insistent that she wants me to take her to a strip club since she has never been to one. Now I know what most of you guys would say, "I'll get my keys, let's go" while knocking over furniture shoving her out the door and into the car.

Here's my concern, I'm afraid if I give in and take her, I've now become the one that took her to a strip club and if she ever decided she regrets or resents going, you guys all know it will be my fault we went, I don't care if she said she wanted to go, it will all come back to me that we went, I can here is now, " you know me, why would you take me there, I know I said I wanted to go, but you should know me better than that and should have just said no we are not going, blah, blah, blah" ie - "it's a trap!"

So what I want to know is, should I just nut up and take her anyway. Then if I go, how should I act while there. I've never been a big strip club guy, but when I have gone I know how to have a good time. I think I should really just let her take the lead, but the fact that she's never been, she will have no clue what to do. I on the other hand I don't want to come across as some old pro at the strip club, I want her to feel like we are both experiencing the whole thing together, etc.

Any advice would be appreciated.
Sack up and go have some fun!
Take her to the Lodge. If she asks, you asked some single guys you know and they recomended it.It has the best looking woman and its very no touch on the main floor so it wil be less threating to her. And great food so you can go at dinner time, eat, watch the ladies. See how she reacts. If its the only club she has been to then with the very little contact she may feel its not such a big thing. So hopefully she will feel its no big deal if you go to one.

If she reacts poorly, then tell her you really did not think she would like it but you were willing to take her since she asked you to. If she seems to like it, then ask her if she thinks any of the women are especialy attractive. Maybe have that lady come over for a drink. Don't push things but see how she reacts. With some, luck, good food, and plenty of drinks, you may get a big supprise and she will have a good time. Lots of the dancers go ape over a woman in with her man. Most likly, if she starts loosing up, they will show her a really good time. If she wants you to get a dance, let her choose a dancer for you. Because there is very little contact there, you have less to worry about her getting upset with some woman rubbing her tits in your face.

Good luck and let us know how it goes
pmdelites's Avatar
does she know or have you ever told her that you've been to a strip club?
what did she say or how did she react to that fact?

i suggest a conversation w/ her along the lines of ...
ok, so you wanna go to a strip club.
what is it about a strip club that you want to experience? are you just wanting to know what it's like there, want to participate, want to watch the crowd? what are you expecting to happen, hope to happen?
is it just a curiosity thing or do you want more?

ok, so if we go, this is your decision and i'm accompanying you. agreed?
it's NOT about me suggestion, convincing, tricking, you into going. agreed?
and it's not something you can say "you took me to a strip club". agreed?


basically, dont make it your decision whether or not she should go. dont weigh in on going or not going. just support her decision.
and dont go ogling at every woman that passes by. watch how she is reacting, engaging, freaking out, drooling.
let her experience it.

OBSG has great idea about going to the Lodge. a safe first excursion.

then after it is all over, ask her ...
so, what did you think of that place?
was it what you thought it might be?
do you ever want to go back to one?
what do you want?


hope it's a deliteful time for her and you.
Take her to the one where the dancers remember your generosity.
Hobbyfun's Avatar
Also when you get there have her start looking around and you watch other tables and ask her why do you think them guys are giving the girls money.

Act like you don't know what to do.
Ask one of the dancers to come over and tell both of you how it works.
Then after a bit tell you SO this place is just about taking our money lets get out of here.

That way you don't look like you have been or been very often.
Be smart about it and act like a dummy the whole time, believe me it will work out better that way.
Take her to the one where the dancers remember your generosity. Originally Posted by Prolongus
THat is the last thing I would want to do:

"Honey, I don't do this much but my friends tell me this is the club I should take you to"

and then walk into my favorite strip club with her....where the waitresses, managers, and dancers know me by name.
pyramider's Avatar
Go for it ... What is the worse thing that could happen?
BigTuna's Avatar
I really just like the Star Wars reference in the title. Admiral Ackbar would be proud.
i think he forgot the sarcasm marks around his suggestion
THat is the last thing I would want to do:

"Honey, I don't do this much but my friends tell me this is the club I should take you to"

and then walk into my favorite strip club with her....where the waitresses, managers, and dancers know me by name. Originally Posted by yourself
VIP Mya Michelle's Avatar
lol this is funny, i think you might be right though tell her to find some girl friends to go with. Women do it all the time!
spyderco75's Avatar
Well let me clarify, she knows I've been to some strip clubs before, and I think she knows I'm no frequent flyer mile card holder, I guess what I was more getting at was answered, that I should just watch her reactions and kind of.follow.along.

Honestly I can't get a.reading on her on this, I fairly certain she has no desires.to ever add a.third.to our activities, and I know she is not.a.complete idiot as far as what goes on in a strip club, I'm really torn on this thing.

I think I'm just gonna say fuck it and take her and see what happens, I would think at.the very least we will both get horned up and go home and wrestle like two drunk chimps on zoo prom night.
Make sure she gets a few shots in her system before, so she feels, frisky, relaxed and so she will be a bit oblivious to your reactions, and wont be watching you like a hawk! This could be really fun for the both of you, if you can make sure SHE has a great time.
While you're wrestling like chimps throw some $1 bills in the air.
Shep could teach you how to do this properly.
You can apply this question to about a million things in your relationship with an SO . . .

Life is a crapshoot . . . stay at the table until you win!

Flyer