Falling in Love

Is true love really possible in this business, or are we really just kidding ourselves?

What might you do when you think you have really fallen in love with someone under these unique circumstances?

While I think it is possible I am also realistic when it comes to falling in love with a provider. What I mean by realistic is that why I could easily fall for a provider I am realistic in that what would a beautiful young woman see in me? While I am a nice person (at least I think so) with a good personality I think providers for a serious relationship would want someone their age.

I believe it's totally possible.
However, not very likely for it to work out.

Not alot of guys "get" that this is a very temporary phase. They also don't understand that because committed "mainstream" relationships are on totally different trajectories, that escorts don't get alot of interference (thinking of their clients during off- hours). To me, this common insecurity is as faulty as thinking that a teacher can't be a good mother because she's around kids all day.

I also think that society places a heavy burden on the relationship, and that escorting can be very socially isolating to both people in the relationship.

There's just alot of complications that make dating as an escort, or dating an escort, very difficult and probably less likely to succeed longterm than relationships with women in other vocations.

If I were to fall in love with someone in these unique circumstances, no one in this world would know. Personally and privately, I would let the relationship happen, go with my feelings, and enjoy being in love and being loved. I would try to avoid making obvious mistakes, try to avoid making mistakes others have made, and try to avoid rushing into commitment and monogamy.

Rachael, I agree.

There are a couple of ladies I've met online only who I think I could have really strong feelings for. I also think they would develop real feelings for me. I've seen glimpses of their real life personalities and find myself attracted to them beyond a sexual level. It's because of my feelings and the potential complications, I've decided to never see them, or even let them know.

One lady in particular has really gained my attention.

Ladies, don't let this scare you. I'll only see ladies who I think we would have a good time together. Those that I believe we'd have some chemistry together, some affection, but not anything deeper. We'll just have an enjoyable time together.

The fantasy is separate from reality.

I believe it's totally possible.
However, not very likely for it to work out.

Not alot of guys "get" that this is a very temporary phase. They also don't understand that because committed "mainstream" relationships are on totally different trajectories, that escorts don't get alot of interference (thinking of their clients during off- hours). To me, this common insecurity is as faulty as thinking that a teacher can't be a good mother because she's around kids all day.

I also think that society places a heavy burden on the relationship, and that escorting can be very socially isolating to both people in the relationship.

There's just alot of complications that make dating as an escort, or dating an escort, very difficult and probably less likely to succeed longterm than relationships with women in other vocations.

If I were to fall in love with someone in these unique circumstances, no one in this world would know. Personally and privately, I would let the relationship happen, go with my feelings, and enjoy being in love and being loved. I would try to avoid making obvious mistakes, try to avoid making mistakes others have made, and try to avoid rushing into commitment and monogamy. Originally Posted by RachaelBenedict

Rachel, You are one smart and well-spoken lady, and tres cute to boot. Ladies like you make love in the demimonde seem attainable.

100% unattainable? No. Likely to happen? Absolutely not. I was just talking with my sister the other day about how movies like Pretty Woman present the idea that if a client generously inserts himself into a woman's life, she will fall in love with him. I've seen this behavior more times than I would care to remember. One thing is certain, in my opinion: If you are hobbying for this very purpose, it's going to scare away every lady you see. If it is going to happen, it will be an accident, and it won't happen overnight.

PS: Most of the guys who make their permanent goals with me known are also the ones who get jealous that I am a provider and actually sleep with other people.

Run like a whipped puppy!

I know of about a dozen in rochester ny area that client & provider got married. I myself almost did. The rate of if it worked or not is about the same as any married and staying together. And yes as China Doll stated "it will be an accident". And it dos get very mmmm not sure of the word looking for. But when the HS/collage age kids start asking mom or dad "?'s" about the long ago past.

Yes, I believe its possible for a client & provider to fall in love. We are human beings and love is a basic need and instinct. We all know why we are in this hobby, but that does not preclude 2 people from falling in love. Sex & love are different needs, and can be confused. I think most of us here keep love out of the equation, and know our relationships are only temporary.

The operative word here is "TRUE love." My opinion is that it is highly improbable for true love to be truly felt on both ends. I think deep caring, loving feelings, infatuation, obsession, etc happens.I think that sometimes the provider OR the client falls in love, but rarely is it mutual to the same extent on the other end. I just feel that falling in love within the hobby is such a bad idea on so many levels. But, alas, when love happens, the heart takes over and the mind takes a back seat.

Love is a choice and a commitment.

Sure, it may start out as hot mutual attraction and lust, and manifest itself through our desire to fuck like animals in heat.

But the lust doesn't last forever. And at some point you have to learn to live with each other and all the warts that come with that. And the warts alone will kill the lust.

At that point it becomes a choice. You choose to commit yourself to the other person warts and all, no matter what. That is true love.

Now, I assume it can happen in the hobby. There's nothing new under the sun. But I don't think it will happen on any kind of frequent basis.

Sure it can happen. They get the sex out of the way. Then move on.

Just ask yourself whether you could get the same girl if you were in a bar.

100% unattainable? No. Likely to happen? Absolutely not. Originally Posted by China Doll

I've come this >< close to falling for a provider. Fortunately for me, she started doing a remarkably accurate impression of my first ex-wife shortly after I began getting infatuated with her. Since that first marriage ended very badly, that cured me of the infatuation multo quick pronto.

Since then, I have become very good friends with another provider (as in, we both know each other's real names and employers, etc., and talk just about every day), but that's a very different relationship. I do agree with your statement that if such a relationship (love/good friendship) happens it's going to be completely accidental; you can't make it happen.

Cheers,

bcg

I know of about a dozen in rochester ny area that client & provider got married. I myself almost did. The rate of if it worked or not is about the same as any married and staying together. And yes as China Doll stated "it will be an accident". And it dos get very mmmm not sure of the word looking for. But when the HS/collage age kids start asking mom or dad "?'s" about the long ago past. Originally Posted by offshoredrilling

It'd definitely make the stories of "How I met your mother" much more, um, interesting than the stories the average kid would hear.



Cheers,

bcg