Urgent Advice needed!

Yea, the ole lady will be home tomorrow and I need to know how to get the smell of ass of a leather couch??

Yea, the ole lady will be home tomorrow and I need to know how to get the smell of ass of a leather couch?? Originally Posted by Boogeyman

piss all over it. are you really a dumbass?

Go buy a puppy real quick.

Vomit on it!

Invite a Provider over to sit on it naked. That should remove your smelly ass smell.

Fuck all that other advice and wasted trips to Home Depot for cleaning products, just make sure when she walks in the door you're sprawled out on the sofa butt naked, you have defecated all over the couch, her dildo and a couple of your porn mags are on the sofa table, and when she walks in just say, "Honey I missed you so much, and I will never try to fuck you in the ass again! That shit hurts!"

Turn the cushion over.

I would try Old English Leather Cleaner, then Febreze. Open all the windows in the house and just before she walks in use an air freshener throughout the house.

Just say that the entire house needed refreshing.

Febreze, works everywhere, haven't taken a bath in years.

Oxyclean works good

Febreze, works everywhere, haven't taken a bath in years. Originally Posted by bojulay

And I thought that I was the only that did that.

I wouldnt use Oxyclean on leather as it will take the color out. I would go to the auto parts store and get a leather cleaning kit. Would work great and smell clean and fresh. The SO may walk in thinking you bought a new car, though wondering why it is in the house.
As for the ass smell, I sure as hell would find another outcall provider if she left anything in my house smelling like a bucket of ass. Damn Man, Must have been copious amounts of bad booze envolved

I would try Old English Leather Cleaner, then Febreze. Open all the windows in the house and just before she walks in use an air freshener throughout the house.

Just say that the entire house needed refreshing. Originally Posted by rcg001

Yeah, that won't seem at all suspicious.

Nothing short of burning the house down will work. Women have that 6th, and 7th and 8th sense for other women.

Am I alone in thinking you've gotta be out of your frikin' mind to entertain in your own house!!!!!