Humor rather than Drama

In a feeble effort to add humor in place of the recent drama in some of these threads, I offer the community this valuable insight regarding the long standing question;

Who is Jack Schitt?

The lineage is finally revealed. Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt." Now you can intellectually handle the situation.

Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt Inc.

In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt, and the deeply religious couple produced 6 children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins: Deap and Dip Schitt.

Against her parents' objections, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school drop out.

After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced.

Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock and because the kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name.
She was then known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock. Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a son of nervous disposition, Chicken Schitt.

Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens wedding.

The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse.

Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new bride, Pisa Schitt.

So now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt", you can correct them because ----- NOW YOU KNOW!!!!!
If I have left anyone out, please enlighten me and the community with the details.

Was Fucking Schitt a cuz, or what Jack did to Noe?

You missed the kid who became a priest--Holy Schit.

This shittt is oh so funny shitt, i luv it EXCEO, told a few people. HA HA....

I'm not sure of the lineage, but there were at least four other cousins . . .
Dontgiva Schitt, Lil Schitt, Ima Schitt and Youra Schitt

How ironic you brought this up Exceo... Fulla Schitt is my distant cousin!! To honor the family name.. I fondly refer to my offspring as Lil Schitt.

lol and my sister, Wedun' Giva Shittt ....

kidding. it sounded funny!