ATF Talk - Newbs, Vets, Providers Welcome

ATF Talk!

I thought this might be an interesting discussion and maybe helpful for some newer hobbyists. Everybody wants different things, has different experiences, and some personalities don’t connect as well… Maybe this post will help some of us navigate/have a bit easier time in the hobby. Don’t get hung up on the all-time part, the fact they’re a favorite is the most important.

Overview/Broadly

Hobbyists: what makes a provider an ATF for you or just a favorite in general? I’m sure everyone will say it’s some combination of looks, performance, personality/connection, but I’m curious what factors people describe as important to them.

Any general advice for hobbyists or providers?

Providers: what factors make a client a favorite of yours? Obviously this is work, but what qualities make one of us a great part of your day?

Any general advice for hobbyist or providers?

More Specifically/Might Help The Newbies:
1. Do you have an ATF/maybe multiple favorites you see? Different cities perhaps?
2. How long did it take for them to become that status for you?
3. How long were you in the hobby when you met them?

Disclaimer: By no means am I an expert on anything, I only know what has worked for me and I’m curious how it went for you all. Feel free to answer/expand on whatever you want, skip ones less interesting to you, etc.

I’ll put my answer in the next reply to try to keep the original post a bit cleaner.

My Background:
I spent a good amount of time in the hobby before I joined the board, so I would read posts/reviews and not see the ROS for example, then eventually joined here and later P411. I started off the AMP route and then to backpage with mixed results and definitely some ridiculous stories along the way. It wasn’t until the last two years I felt like I started to understand what works for me in the hobby/what I needed to do to feel comfortable, and to have a successful encounter.

Overview/Broadly

Hobbyists: what makes a provider an ATF for you or just a favorite in general?

Obviously I’m looking for looks/performance, but the personality/connection is a big piece for me. I like a provider I can joke around with and have fun, that can be a friend type of relationship, where the GFE can feel more authentic/I just feel way more relaxed. I’m under no illusion it’s work, yet I want to be a fun part of the day for them because that’s just how I am… I feel like with the right provider, it’s been something that helped me have more fun as a result too.

Any general advice for hobbyists or providers?
Patience is the most generic and truthful piece we need in this hobby. I definitely rushed myself into lackluster experiences and sometimes sketchy situations because I couldn’t get myself to slow down and think clearly. The best thing I could advise is to be patient and research more, you don’t have to have all the bad experiences many of us have, the information is out there if you aren’t afraid to dig.

More Specifically/Might Help The Newbies:
1. Do you have an ATF/maybe multiple favorites you see? Different cities perhaps? —> I have 6-7 great providers I love to see, 3 different cities, and 3 would be travelers. There’s a few others I would repeat, but maybe they aren’t quite to that level yet for me personally.

2. How long did it take for them to become that status for you? —> For me, they were all well on their way during the first meeting, by the time we had a second it was pretty easy to tell we clicked.

3. How long were you in the hobby when you met them? —> YEARS! Too long to be honest, I spent probably 8 years in the hobby before I joined here and another almost year before P411… I probably wouldn’t have found my current favorites without those tools.

Another research tip, it helps learning who around here has similar taste to you, I know there are a few people’s opinions I trust pretty well/make life much easier lol

Interesting topic String. Like you I " hobbied" many years before joining here. I've had many favorites, and some good friends and one which basically was more a relationship. Past and present favorites. Different appearance, height, body types etc... The things that they shared? Attitude, fun, passion. Each in their own way made our time together feel special, whether for an hour at a time or over the course of many years. It's this type of giving that can't be faked or hidden. There's a connection worth enjoying over time or there is not. One that's is mutual between both parties, or it's not. Just one man's humble opinion...

The things that they shared? Attitude, fun, passion. Each in their own way made our time together feel special, whether for an hour at a time or over the course of many years. It's this type of giving that can't be faked or hidden. There's a connection worth enjoying over time or there is not. One that's is mutual between both parties, or it's not. Just one man's humble opinion... Originally Posted by KCFalcon77

This is definitely a statement I identify with 100% Falcon, glad you like the topic too!

It’s easy to get discouraged or rush in this world, but for me, the best experiences I’ve had were the result of patience and a good connection. Some people don’t want that, and to teach their own… but if it feels inauthentic, I’m just not into it personally.

You are spot on, I couldn’t agree more. It’s those connections that kept me going.
Us women also have ATFs, we never forget them, ever.
Laughter, passion, good times,
never just an impersonal transaction.

I try to be cognizant of a providers boundaries/respect their time of course, but if I feel like I can have some fun and flirt a bit with them, I’m all for it. I feel like the ongoing conversations I have sometimes with a favorite provider will build anticipation for the appointment and can make both of us feel more at ease… I think being able to read the room a bit here is essential though, I don’t want the banter back and forth to be anything that isn’t as well received by them as it is by me.

Glad to hear the providers perspective Stacy!

You are spot on, I couldn’t agree more. It’s those connections that kept me going.
Us women also have ATFs, we never forget them, ever.
Laughter, passion, good times,
never just an impersonal transaction. Originally Posted by MatureBeauty

Thank you for your thoughts Stacy. As you said you never forget those people you make a real connection with. Every human regardless of gender or age has an inherent need for human touch, and connection. Having the skill or ability to make others feel desired, wanted or appreciated in someway is to be admired and rewarded....

If you do your research well you’ve already likely checked your boxes on looks and activities. So the ATF comes in with connection. Did they provide my definition of a GFE experience (genuine or not, I’ll never know)? If I leave feeling like they enjoyed more than my envelope than they are ATF candidates. It’s harder than it sounds. I’ve only had a few girls I’ve seen 3+ times.

What I like in a provider is same day availability and being able to get in with em fast. I've found that my anxiety builds with appointments in advance and can outweigh my desire for fun. It stinks and I know it doesn't vibe with a decent amount of providers, unfortunately

Great topic!
I think we value the same qualities String.
I can only think of 3 ladies I've met 3 or more times. In fact I let my P411 expire as there was only 1 lady I'd seen in over a year.
Then I had a couple years where funds were a problem & didn't see anyone. Rejoined P411 & she was the 1st lady I reached out to. Set up an overnight & she ghosted me. Made no sense.
Found another great lady, took her to Vegas twice. However the 2nd trip was different. She "rode with a friend" to Vegas, a "male friend". Asked her if this friend was why the trip was different & no response. Probably won't see her again.
Leaving for Vegas in 3 weeks with another lady & hoping we have a great time & the great times last longer.

What I like in a provider is same day availability and being able to get in with em fast. I've found that my anxiety builds with appointments in advance and can outweigh my desire for fun. It stinks and I know it doesn't vibe with a decent amount of providers, unfortunately Originally Posted by ughiphopfan

Different strokes my friend. That doesn't really sound like you have a ATF scenario in mind, which is fine, but it was the topic. That comes across as more of a "hit it and quit it" type deal....

Different strokes my friend. That doesn't really sound like you have a ATF scenario in mind, which is fine, but it was the topic. That comes across as more of a "hit it and quit it" type deal.... Originally Posted by KCFalcon77

I would agree Falcon, but I will say that I used to have a regular person I saw that lived fairly close and I would be able to see on shorter notice… it was super nice for sure, but I feel like she was the exception to the rule… We clicked well, I knew her RW schedule enough to work within that framework pretty easily, and I had a lot of fun with her… but most of the time if I’m looking for something quickly, it leads to poor decision making for me, so I try to plan/avoid these scenarios as a result.

Vegas - Good luck on the trip man, I haven’t pulled the trigger on an overnight, but I’ve considered before… I book longer sessions often, but I’ve been hesitant on an overnight because I’m not sure what to expect/what I want from that I guess.