1. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
2.One tequila,Two tequila, Three tequila, Floor....
3.If the police arrest a mime do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
4.The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
5.If someone has multiple personality's and threatens to kill themselves does that make it a hostage situation?
6. One nice thing about egotist ; they only talk about themselves
7.Do infants enjoy infantry as much as adults enjoy adultery?
8.Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "Assteroids"?
9.Can an atheist get insurance against 'Acts of God'?
10.Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?