Gentlemen, Can You Rely On Your References?

Well, I have this nice gentleman on the board contact me almost 48hrs ago! He gives me a total of 4 references along with phone numbers and email addresses! I do not contact any lady by phone unless I know them personally and most ladies ask that you email them for references! So, I email these ladies! The first one replies promptly and said she had not seen him in over a year and would not vouch for him and I totally understand it.....I wouldn't either! The second lady said he recognized his number, but needed a little more information! I sent her the information and haven't heard back just yet! The other 2 ladies, I still haven't heard back from! Now mind you, this is the weekend and maybe they haven't checked their email, but one would think, they may have potential clients who want to see them asap!

My question to you.......if you gave a lady your references, and they didn't get back to her in a timely manner, would you ever see one of your references again?

Just kinda blows my mind because I always reply to the ladies when asked for a reference! But, I guess that's just me!

Haven't ever had that problem, but sure I'd see them again (if I would have anyway). That's why I'm a fan of advance screening. Gives all concerned plenty of time to be safe.

It may depend on the ladies in question... some will only give ref's by phone and you may need to contact them first, some are email only, some may have "I do not give ref's" on their website, etc. Others may be out of town with family or friends and may not have computer access, others may be at their RL job, etc.

Sorry your having a tough time with this Just let the gent know the situation and I am sure he will understand. Good luck sweetie.

Funny, this is the first time this has ever happened to me! And yes, the gentlemen has been very understanding!

Lol. Well, this has happened to me before and I just kinda roll with it. If I can't screen, I just politely try to postpone meeting until I can screen. At least he is being patient with all this. I am not in your state, but if you ever need a ref from me, just let know

Can I ask why ladies need a reference to be within a short time frame (ie 2 months or 6 months). Do references wear off? I understand that the longer the time, the less likely a reference will remember you, but what if the reference specifically does recall you and you are in good standing? Just curious, as I don't hobby frequently...thx.

I'm the understanding type. I (generally) give everyone the benefit of the doubt. So, if I liked the providers that I gave as references, I would see them again even if they were not timely in providing a reference for me.

Makes me wonder if any of the ladies I know would give me a "okay" even though it's been almost a year since I have even logged into this account....

Guess I should find that out.

My question to you.......if you gave a lady your references, and they didn't get back to her in a timely manner, would you ever see one of your references again?

! Originally Posted by Lana Warren

If the sex was really good, absolutely. But would find another reference. It's just business


This is why I got p411, tired of the bullshit of no response, references calling saying why don't you just see me instead babe, and why are you seeing that skank? Blah, blah blah

P411 is the best. And yes, Lana, I would see a known provider even if she didn't pass along my reference. Could be lots of reasons why didn't. But P411 does it for you; a great site for the newbies who aren't aware of it.

If the sex was really good, absolutely. But would find another reference. It's just business


This is why I got p411, tired of the bullshit of no response, references calling saying why don't you just see me instead babe, and why are you seeing that skank? Blah, blah blah Originally Posted by monkmonk

Oh, I absolutely agree that P411 is the best thing since sliced bread, but even though you have lots of okays, I still prefer to talk to a few of the ladies!

What's really sad is, you're sooooo right about some of the ladies will try anything to keep you from seeing someone else! Yes, this is a business and good customer service comes from making your customer or any potential customer happy!

That's why as said above P411 is the best. I am a P411 member with multiple provider OK's - so it's never even been an issue for me. But I would be very mad if I had no P411 and a provider I had seen would not give a reference. And even worse- reason being jealousy and instead she asks to come see her again instead of a different provider . Well guess what - I would never see that provider again.

Absolutely no excuse for a provider to not give a reference to a fellow provider in this day and age of technology. Only reasons are jealousy and a blatant " I dont care attitude ". Lana, also I dont know if you can discuss in your girls' locker room as to which providers do this.

Another more effective way would be - to PM or email that client and let him know that the ladies he had seen are not giving him references. Guess what - You will be surprised at how fast things speed up . If a client contacts a provider regarding her not giving a reference- the response is usually much faster. Good luck !!!

That's why as said above P411 is the best. I am a P411 member with multiple provider OK's - so it's never even been an issue for me. But I would be very mad if I had no P411 and a provider I had seen would not give a reference. And even worse- reason being jealousy and instead she asks to come see her again instead of a different provider . Well guess what - I would never see that provider again.

Absolutely no excuse for a provider to not give a reference to a fellow provider in this day and age of technology. Only reasons are jealousy and a blatant " I dont care attitude ". Lana, also I dont know if you can discuss in your girls' locker room as to which providers do this.

Another more effective way would be - to PM or email that client and let him know that the ladies he had seen are not giving him references. Guess what - You will be surprised at how fast things speed up . If a client contacts a provider regarding her not giving a reference- the response is usually much faster. Good luck !!! Originally Posted by delimex007

My gentleman has been informed of the lack of responses and it's up to him whether or not he wants to contact them! Personally, I would!

As of posting this in the Powder Room, I see no good would come out of it because I'm not for sure I would be able to hold my tongue! LOL! Those who know me, know that I'm one of the nicest ladies around and I am the first to give anyone the benefit of doubt!

Probably the best way to handle this in the future is for any gentleman to contact his references in advance and ask if they can use them as reference! I get these requests all the time and not once have I ever said no! Problem is, we have enabled this bad behavior and it's up to us to correct it!

There are those of us who live quite some distance from DFW, the Mecca of the hobby, but still come to play occasionally. I would respectfully ask for a pass on the time limitation for reference as it can be quite a span of time between hobbying visits to you ladies. Thankfully, mine have been very understanding in the past I guess, since no provider has asked for additional references thus indicating that the ones I have supplied have either refused for time or distance.

That's why as said above P411 is the best. Originally Posted by delimex007

+1 Besides .. I'm not thrilled with the idea of my booking activity being passed around among providers. I would rather not have my past dates contacted ... unless it was me ... booking, again.