PROVIDER'S NEEDING HELP $

I have had a strange deal happen this week end I was planning a trip to Tulsa to see a provider whom I have never seen before l was asked to seen her money in advance, l'm not the most intellenge person but knew better than to do this, then l have a provider who l have seen and like very well contact me needing help with money matters, l know you girls all make better money than l do what's up is the hobby biz that slow
Christmas is coming up...
The Sixth Beatle's Avatar
I wouldn't do it, but if you do, just chalk the money up as gone. I've loaned money to former friends (no providers) and have found that after the crisis is over, they're as likely to act as if the loan never happened and may resent you for wanting it back. I had one former friend who borrowed (?) $2,100 to keep from losing his house. At the time, he promised to make steady payments until I was paid back, but once his situation cleared he pretended I didn't exist. A 15-year friendship was lost. I've loaned some money to a girlfriend - mentioned the debt when she had told me she would pay me back and received an excuse why she couldn't come up with the money at that time.

Unless you just feel like giving money away and receiving scorn in return, I wouldn't do it. There are probably some high-quality character ladies in this business, but you won't find out without taking a risk. Just my opinion.
JackJohnson's Avatar
then l have a provider who l have seen and like very well contact me needing help with money matters, l know you girls all make better money than l do what's up is the hobby biz that slow Originally Posted by gary5912
There are some standard hustles in the biz. Some providers don't see you as paying for an act, when they need money it becomes more like a "sugar daddy" situation and they will hit you up. You can tell pretty quickly after awhile who is on the hustle and who isn't. (of course, that's a matter of degree) Maybe she isn't, but it happens all the time.

It almost always starts with they "lost" some money, or things are "slow." Most will just keep hinting about how they need to pay their phone bill, or rent, etc... and have a drama filled story to boot. They will wait for you to offer.

Generally when I get hit up for a loan, I suggest they sign a loan agreement, we notarize it and they offer collateral. I set the interest rate. That will generally get them off your back.

Of course, the obvious is to say "you can come work off the money and interest over a couple of days first... at my rate, since you're asking ME for the money" They will usually protest and its worth a laugh.

The best answer is... of course... No. Most providers want to firewall off their life and their business. So should you. You are buying an illusion she wants you, or you wouldn't have a transaction involved. Never let that illusion extend past that time. The intimacy of the transaction puts YOU in a vulnerable position, and some providers will manipulate that.

Funny story, I once had a provider ask me for $500 bucks for a car repair for her "Mercedes." I laughed... I mean really laughed for a couple of minutes. She hung up.

Anyway, I'm sure others will have different stories about how they have great provider friends who they loan money to, or providers who will talk about great clients they have ... fair enough. as they say... YMMV.

Since this isn't in the Mens only area...
There is never any time or any reason why a provider should ask a hobbyist for $$ outside the expected donation.

There are two simple rules to follow in this hobby:

#1 This is fucks for bucks.
#2 Friendships in the hobby should never, ever be need based.

Follow those rules and you will do fine.
I have had a strange deal happen this week end I was planning a trip to Tulsa to see a provider whom I have never seen before l was asked to seen her money in advance, l'm not the most intellenge person but knew better than to do this, then l have a provider who l have seen and like very well contact me needing help with money matters, l know you girls all make better money than l do what's up is the hobby biz that slow Originally Posted by gary5912
For any lady asking for money in advance or extra cash outside of the hobby RUN the other way and find someone else. Don't get pulled into her personal issues/finance problems.
kcjjj's Avatar
  • kcjjj
  • 11-11-2012, 06:36 PM
[QUOTE=JackJohnson;

It almost always starts with they "lost" some money, or things are "slow." Most will just keep hinting about how they need to pay their phone bill, or rent, etc... and have a drama filled story to boot. They will wait for you to offer.

Generally when I get hit up for a loan, I suggest they sign a loan agreement, we notarize it and they offer collateral. I set the interest rate. That will generally get them off your back.

Of course, the obvious is to say "you can come work off the money and interest over a couple of days first... at my rate, since you're asking ME for the money" They will usually protest and its worth a laugh.

The best answer is... of course... No. Most providers want to firewall off their life and their business. So should you. You are buying an illusion she wants you, or you wouldn't have a transaction involved. Never let that illusion extend past that time. The intimacy of the transaction puts YOU in a vulnerable position, and some providers will manipulate that.

Funny story, I once had a provider ask me for $500 bucks for a car repair for her "Mercedes." I laughed... I mean really laughed for a couple of minutes. She hung up.

Anyway, I'm sure others will have different stories about how they have great provider friends who they loan money to, or providers who will talk about great clients they have ... fair enough. as they say... YMMV.

Since this isn't in the Mens only area... [/QUOTE]
This advice is spot on. I have loaned money to friends, family, co-workers, and a provider. I have always made the loans expecting that I would never get any of it back- interesting enough my friends have fared better than family, and co-workers better than the provider. To be fair to the provider, I did get 75% of it back and a couple "freebies" but not enough to add up to the difference that was owed.

While it is true that many of the providers can easily "out-earn" hobbyists they also let this money flow through the hands pretty easily. Heck, if I had a printing press between my legs I would spend a lot more than I do!!!
This advice is spot on. I have loaned money to friends, family, co-workers, and a provider. I have always made the loans expecting that I would never get any of it back- interesting enough my friends have fared better than family, and co-workers better than the provider. To be fair to the provider, I did get 75% of it back and a couple "freebies" but not enough to add up to the difference that was owed.

While it is true that many of the providers can easily "out-earn" hobbyists they also let this money flow through the hands pretty easily. Heck, if I had a printing press between my legs I would spend a lot more than I do!!! Originally Posted by kcjjj
it makes me think there not taking care of there money as they should and may have personal problems with issues we are not allow to comment on with the young ones and the older ladies more likely to be taking care of family and kids
Ya, I don't do it cause I know by simple math the immense earning potential these ladies have for the amount of actual hours they work. Just think if a gal works just 40 weeks out of the year and 5 days each week. 1 $200 appt per day Grosses 40k per year. Just think if they do 2 appts per day, 80k per year... I know some have a a revolving door and do 6 or more per day, maybe not 5 days a week, but still, we are talking six figures now. Hell I should be asking them for a fucking loan. lol

You just have to wonder where all of it is going. Some I am sure take care of family, some "consume" it in bad ways, others give it to "management", etc.
DallasRain's Avatar
There is never any time or any reason why a provider should ask a hobbyist for $$ outside the expected donation.

There are two simple rules to follow in this hobby:

#1 This is fucks for bucks.
#2 Friendships in the hobby should never, ever be need based.

Follow those rules and you will do fine. Originally Posted by SinsOfTheFlesh


amen!!!
BigMikeinKC's Avatar
"Neither a borrower nor a lender be;
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man."

Nor do I contract for work on my home, auto repairs, etc. with family or friends. It tends to led to lost friends and family resentment.
it makes me think there not taking care of there money as they should and may have personal problems with issues we are not allow to comment on with the young ones and the older ladies more likely to be taking care of family and kids Originally Posted by gary5912
Let's not forget, there are "young ones" out there taking care of children, too.

I know times have been a little tougher over the past year for me, personally, as I suddenly found myself in a situation of caring for my ex in-laws because they are both declining in health and have no income right now. Yes, I realize that they are "not my responsibility", per se, but yet, they are. They have shown me unconditional love and have been an active, every day, part of my life for over 10 years, even though I am not with their son anymore. He won't do anything to help them, and I am not going to sit back and watch them suffer. My own mother has passed, and I choose not to have a relationship with my "real" father, so I will support them all I can, even to the point of doing without myself, because I love them and I have a good heart, and I know they would do the same for me if they were in that position.

I guess maybe that takes away from the fantasy that a provider is just making millions out there and foolishly squandering it. Sorry to burst your bubbles, guys, but most of us are actually just living "day to day".
Ya, I don't do it cause I know by simple math the immense earning potential these ladies have for the amount of actual hours they work. Just think if a gal works just 40 weeks out of the year and 5 days each week. 1 $200 appt per day Grosses 40k per year. Just think if they do 2 appts per day, 80k per year... I know some have a a revolving door and do 6 or more per day, maybe not 5 days a week, but still, we are talking six figures now. Hell I should be asking them for a fucking loan. lol

You just have to wonder where all of it is going. Some I am sure take care of family, some "consume" it in bad ways, others give it to "management", etc. Originally Posted by royamcr

I'm not sure where people get these figures from, but you should take into account that a lot of us are NOT high volume providers. I sometimes go several days in between dates, usually because the timing just can't be worked out. Also, let's not forget that most providers generally take off at least ONE week a month.
Ya that's why my numbers are very conservative in the amounts of appt's just to illustrate the gross earning potential of working just a few hours a day. Then some girls are asking for loans... Even if you aren't high volume that can be made up by having a little higher rate. Or maybe fewer but longer appts. Some take a week off a month, and some do oral only specials during that week. :-) Then some are rude and just work anyway, then at the last minute spring the "aunt flo" on the guy.
We can't win, babe. We raise our rates and most will just go elsewhere. It's a very competitive market, as I'm sure you know. I'd be thrilled to book longer sessions, but truth be told, most gents wants an hour or less. When times are super slow and you get one half hour or even hour session in a couple of days it doesn't really go that far. As for the "aunt flo" thing, you will usually find me at home in my pj's doing nothing but feeling horrible. lol Also, believe it or not, sometimes she really DOES visit "off schedule". It's quite embarrassing for the ladies, so try to be understanding... It's not like we have an ON/OFF switch lol