Coming Out of the Closet--No Not THAT Closet!

]I've been here on Eccie for a few months now and seen some terrific ladies. I've even strayed off a bit and found a gem or two in the Badlands of Backpages. But I have been kidding myself.

I read the reviews, I watch a porno film now and then (and maybe more often than that) and I go looking for a slam bang good time. That's not me and I want to fix that. I posted a couple weeks ago about the importance of good conversation and that got me thinking.

Here's the deal--for an hour I want to fall in love. With a pretty lady. A very pretty lady. A sweet lady. I want to suspend disbelief so completely that I can buy the idea that the beautiful woman with me would not rather be anyplace else or with anyone else. That she ENJOYS MY COMPANY.

Yes I definitely want a memorable sexual experience, but truly the kind that builds naturally, slowly, sensuously. I am not at all interested in seeing if I can break the record for MSOG. I can't. One very good shot is all that expected and appreciated. But for the rest of the time we could lay there and stroke and caress.

I have been going through a very difficult time now--employment-wise, health-wise, financial-wise, marriage-wise--you name it. Bottoming out.

I want to have an uplifting experience.
I know----wimp.

Based on all the battles you are fighting in real life, I tend to think participation in the Hobby will only exacerbate your problems.

I agree with Tin man, Floridian. Unfortunately, none of the girls here really enjoy our company. The really good ones are just better at pretending that they do. Don't mean to sound negative, but thems just the facts.

If you want real happiness, it will not be found here. If you want temporary fulfillment, this is a good pick me up. I think it is a mistake to confuse any of this with reality.

Sorry about your situation, and hope things get better for you

If you are looking for real passion you might get lucky and find it with a civilian. But if you can be satisfied with the illusion of passion there are many fine ladies here who can make you feel like a million dollars for that brief fleeting moment in time. Just don't get the idea you can call them the next day and say "I'm broke" and expect them to say "come on over anyway."

[SIZE="4"]Not what I wanted to hear guys--but probably the truth.
Thank you.

Sometimes life sucks.

I really wish some gents would not state ALL providers have the same traits. The gents here are NOT all the same and the ladies are NOT all the same...period.

Floridian, do some research. If you are financially challenged at this time, it might be hard to find the right lady who can give the experience you seek. While MANY of us actually DO enjoy our gentlemen friends, we are still running a BUSINESS. If we didn't choose to offer our time for remuneration, then there would be no need for any of us to be here. Most of us didn't start escorting in order to find the "loves of our lives", but it doesn't mean we are not genuine people or we don't really enjoy spending time with some of the gents here. I hate there may be those out there who have yet to experience this.

I hope things pick up for you and become less stressful. It sounds like you're in a slump and most of us have experienced that. Life is constantly changing.....while things may not be going like you want them to today, tomorrow things may be wonderful. Chin up! xoxo

Floridian:

Yea man, we are all looking for something like that. The hobby offers us some physical relaxation which is a requirement. The emotional, fill-that-empty-hole-in-our-hearts is very tough to find. And it is illusionary.

But.... Some of the ladies do provide that emotional experience, or at least I have found it so. I know several ladies who do just that. AND... Since Max posted on here I would strongly suggest giving her a try. I have, and she is a truly fine person. A fun time too... But she made me feel wanted...She is fun, light, sexy, illusionary ! Guess I like that word right now.

And I am not listing a bunch of ladies who in my opinion are fully able to do just what you are looking for. Not for any reason other than I am too lazy at this moment. But they are out there. And they are well reviewed as being just that. Stay after it. You will get lucky.

If you can accept it for what it is -- that the ladies (at least, some of them) really do value and appreciate their clients and enjoy time spent with them -- it might be a nice pick-me-up.

But if you are apt to look back later and suffer negative feelings -- focusing not on the fact that they value/appreciate you as a client and enjoy time with you as a client, but on the fundamental reality that they would likely not choose you for a real-life friend or romantic/sexual interest -- you may feel worse after the euphoria wears off than you did before embarking on the adventure.

The ladies generally are not deceptive or manipulative, and many do enjoy spending time with you and appreciate you, but it doesn't go beyond that. Some of us are comfortable with that reality; those who aren't, may regret it when they are reminded of those boundaries. You're in the best position to evaluate your emotional status, but the comments about bottoming out suggest that the negative reaction may be more likely than the positive reaction.

Good luck.

Floridian: I am going against the majority on this one and say if, IF you don't spend you last dime so to speak then yes it can be a great pick me up. Like the others said, fun for us guys and a business for the ladies, and part of that business is her wanting you to post a good review, and to come back. Sometimes you get what you give, treat her like a piece of ass and you will get an ok time at best, be a gentleman and treat her like a lady and she will treat you like a king even if it is just for an hour. Know that when your time is up it is up even if she is a no rush provider, and really has more time make up an excuse to leave with grace. Do your homework and I for one at least want to belive you can find what you are looking for, IF you keep your budget in mind and know it is just a dream ...
I say realax and enjoy the ride!

Thanks everybody for their responses.
I think I'm just projecting some of my bad vibes on others.
I have indeed had some great experiences with several ladies
and have actually begun forming actual bonds of friendship with one.

This whole "woe is me" thing started when a provider I had become infatuated with via email/PM suddenly stopped "talking.".

This whole "woe is me" thing started when a provider I had become infatuated with via email/PM suddenly stopped "talking.".

Originally Posted by floridian671

You never saw her and got thrown into a funk just because she wouldn't email/PM with you? Maybe you should take up fishing or collecting stamps as a hobby...

HOLD ON BACK THE TRUCK UP

Are you guys telling me that these ladys are faking passion,
I thought all this time the ladys enjoyed our company now you guys are
tell me that these ladys are just here for the money

Thats not right.

You want it all. OK, noble goal. You want a passionate, open-minded, girlfriend-ish experience with a model-like Provider that'll get up and leave once your desires are satiated. You don't want any "skin in the game" (i.e., zero commitment, $ up front and nothing after that, no meeting the family, going to church, investing anything other than a dna sample if/when you get your business in her open-minded, passionate GFE mouth) but you desire that the young lady (I presume you want her young too, right?) do a really good job of "pretending" that you're special to her? I presume you'll also require she be somewhere along a 36D-22-34 (eraser nipples, shaved and LOVES anal?) dimensional-type woman too? Under this once-in-a-lifetime (or is this something you expect every time you visit with the special Provider that can live up to this lofty standard?) scenario what would you be willing to invest? Four figures? Five? How much time would each visit require? One hour? Overnight? I suppose it boils down to just how good of an actress can you afford?

But, after all that you'd still need to accept the simple fact that you're rneeting a commodity (as beautiful as she might be you're not the owner, hubby, boyfriend) and it's the $ that you leave on a small table that means she's gonna see you as a commodity too. After all of the planning, research, high-hopes and searching about you're still in the same boat as every other Hobbyists. The difference is how you want to perceive your time with any of the hundreds of hotties that bless us with their presence and gifts. Wanna have a good time? Show respect and consideration. Wanna have a gfe? Good luck and I hope you "click" with one or more of the Providers and find it since most of the guys here are looking for the same thing.

If you are looking for real passion you might get lucky and find it with a civilian. But if you can be satisfied with the illusion of passion there are many fine ladies here who can make you feel like a million dollars for that brief fleeting moment in time. Just don't get the idea you can call them the next day and say "I'm broke" and expect them to say "come on over anyway." Originally Posted by trynagetlaid

Amen! Hit the nail right square on the head my friend. It's all an illusion, just some are better at it than others.

I disagree that it's always an illusion. It's frequently real within limits, what Elizabeth Bernstein referred to as "bounded authenticity." The ladies wouldn't be there without the $$$, but that just means that "it's about the money" -- not that "it's only about the money." Some of the ladies do sincerely like, and enjoy spending time with, their clients, within the boundaries of that one hour (or longer) appointment even though they do not want anything more. You just have to learn and accept that the connection is limited to that context, and not mistake it for more than it really is or try to violate her boundaries.

My perception and belief, anyway.