Not All There

Okay, I will grant upfront that I may get reviled for even having the temerity to even bring up the subject and ask such a revealing question, but then how are we to learn more about the hobby if we don't question certain assumptions.

So my question, after having been in the hobby for enough years to have a sense of perspective from seeing enough providers to piece together a sort of template of what the essential characteristics of a provider are.

I am sorry to say, but it seems to me that most providers are "not all there". Does anyone else ever get that feeling?

. . . Of course, then the logical question is do providers think that their customers "are all there" too?

This is such a broad generalization type of question. I hate stereotyping b/c I have met several wonderful providers who definitely are "all there". However, I would have to say that a considerable number of providers I've met are "not all there". A better poll would break things down by percentages. I'd say for me it would be 60-40 in terms of being all there.

FastGunn continues to prove to the providers that he is not all there.

. . . You should talk, green frog, I mean yammer.

I'm going to agree with something Cpalmson said, it's very difficult to generalize.

I have definitely met some ladies who have "significant issues" of various sorts, but I've also met some absolutely got-their-act-totally-together ladies. I will agree there may be more ladies in this business who are in the business less because they "want to be" than because they don't feel they have a realistic option--and that can produce some issues even where there were none when they started.

I also think there is a significant fraction of ladies on the BP/SW type rungs who have some chemical imbalances who skew the overall numbers. But put those aside I don't know that the percentages are that far off from other struggling single moms out there. In case some folks have forgotten, this is a high stress occupation from many points of view.

I also find that there is a significant variance in how a lady acts/behaves depending how the client she is with treats her. I have seen some ladies who are perfectly sane, reasonable, and enjoyable when I'm with them--but who have some pretty off-the-way reviews. In many of those cases I look at the reviewers, see how they post/review/act on here, and definitely see how some ladies would seriously get off on them in a bad way.

I will hasten to add that just because these girls are usually "not all there", they are

. . . still sexy and attractive. I think that's where men get lost. They focus on the sexy aspect of the girl, and naturally forget about the sanity that is usually not even there!

I'm not sure what exactly the OP means by 'not all there', whether that is a reference to the person's mental capacity, psychiatric condition, or pharmaceutical state... or maybe any/all of the above. All I know is that I do a lot of research and am very careful about who I see, and I've never felt that any woman I've been with was less than "all there".

It is just using the vernacular to loosely describe a wide range of behavior having to do with her irrationality.

From my perspective, young and attractive women, in general, tend to be irrational. Grandmothers, maybe not so much.

Does anyone disagree with that observation?

. . . She will fly off the handle or do totally unexpected things, but then the thought occurred to me that maybe the ladies think the same thing of men!

Half of the people I meet everyday give me the feeling they are not "all there'', of course I feel perfectly normal.

I've got to weigh in here. When I read the question, I wasn't thinking in terms of psychiatric shortcomings. None of us are really 'all there.' I was thinking in terms of being there physically in to the act or acts. From experience, I can tell you many of the ladies make sure they don't orgasm no matter what is on their face and what the 'show' indicates. Most men can't tell anyway. They fake the orgasms to make the gentlemen feel good. It seems to me that there are only a few ladies in it for their own pleasure as well as the funds. So when asked if they were 'all there', that was my interpretation. For most providers, it is just a job and they do it well. The GFE is sort of a fantasy that is fulfilled. She isn't a real GF or lover. I've had ladies make me feel very good. They have tried to make me feel like I'm some sort of special client. Then let us say at holiday time when they need money, they offer a discount to ALL their regulars to get more business. So much for being special! So to me, the ladies aren't all there. BTW, I have discovered that younger ladies tend to be more in to the emotional aspects and that the more mature ones who are can be very selective in clientel. They aren't in it totally for the money. That is my 2 cents.

I generally alternate between the 3 same Provider's. If I had to pigon hole these girls according to the Standards Fast Gunn has layed out here: 1 would be "Sane and All There", 1 would be "Not All There" depending upon her mood that day & 1 would be about 80% "Sane and All There"/20% "Not All There" during a session. The one that is not all there I am considering dropping due to her erratic behavior. I don't believe she is using PT (anymore, she has admitted past use which could be the source of her behavior). But its just getting a bit too weird for me.

Great thread fg. This thread will have ladies beating a path to your door.

I have been lucky enough to meet up with a couple ladies on my travels (I don't play too close home), who seemed to have it all together. By that I mean they are in the business and are comfortable being intimate with strangers. They really do a better job being comfortable than I am. However, I have been really conflicted a few times because I ran into ladies that I think were too needy. I don't know if it was because of emotional issues, psychological issues, they were getting desperate in their personal life or what. What I find very difficult is that there is only so much I can do to help. Nobody out there knows me but I really appreciate the gifts these ladies give. I also am very sensitive to the risk they take, the pressure to perform (and some or you guys want some pretty disgusting things). I am a father and feel for the struggles some of these ladies have that brought them into this hobby and keep them in this risky hobby. I would like to see something that gives these providers insurance, security, retirement and not just have to work until they are no longer desired. That is on us folks. I will also add this, on these discussion boards there is a lot of fun and banter. However, these ladies are our sisters, our mothers, our family and our friends. Show a little kindness.

I have been lucky enough to meet up with a couple ladies on my travels (I don't play too close home), who seemed to have it all together. By that I mean they are in the business and are comfortable being intimate with strangers. They really do a better job being comfortable than I am. However, I have been really conflicted a few times because I ran into ladies that I think were too needy. I don't know if it was because of emotional issues, psychological issues, they were getting desperate in their personal life or what. What I find very difficult is that there is only so much I can do to help. Nobody out there knows me but I really appreciate the gifts these ladies give. I also am very sensitive to the risk they take, the pressure to perform (and some or you guys want some pretty disgusting things). I am a father and feel for the struggles some of these ladies have that brought them into this hobby and keep them in this risky hobby. I would like to see something that gives these providers insurance, security, retirement and not just have to work until they are no longer desired. That is on us folks. I will also add this, on these discussion boards there is a lot of fun and banter. However, these ladies are our sisters, our mothers, our family and our friends. Show a little kindness. Originally Posted by Hermosa

Well said.

I am sorry to say, but it seems to me that most providers are "not all there". Does anyone else ever get that feeling? Originally Posted by Fast Gunn

They focus on the sexy aspect of the girl, and naturally forget about the sanity that is usually not even there! Originally Posted by Fast Gunn

From my perspective, young and attractive women, in general, tend to be irrational. Originally Posted by Fast Gunn

Hmmm.......

There are times that the more you open your mouth, the deeper the hole becomes.