Affairs... what was your experience?

How many of you guys/ladies have ever had an affair? It can be a civilian or hobby affair. We all know they usually end up horrible and no one ever wins. Some of you guys hobby to avoid such things. The hobby is supposed to be one of the most honest and simplistic relationships, but try as we might things get a little blurred at times. This was one of the reasons I loved the hobby, so I could get my physical needs met while not being vunerable and at the same time making decent money while focusing on school/family. Anyone willing to share their story?
ztonk's Avatar
  • ztonk
  • 12-27-2010, 06:34 PM
Can you elaborate a bit about what you mean by a "hobby affair"?
An affair stemming from the hobby. It started as a provider / client relationship, but progressed into an actual affair. Any other affair is an acceptable topic as well.
levibob56's Avatar
Britney what you doing tomorrow? lol I steal need to meet you for lunch. This could be the start of a wonderful affair!!!
Interesting topic, Brit. I'm curious to see the responses from people who have been in that predicament.

I haven't ever been a part of an actual affair (hobby or civilian), but I can testify to the fact that lines between hobby relationships and real relationships can become quite fuzzy. I'd like to say that if I fell for a client who was married, I wouldn't try to push the relationship any further, but in that situation my resistance would be more to protect myself than some quiet show of integrity. And when I think about it... I know that if I really had strong feelings for someone and it seemed those feelings were reciprocated, it would be damn near impossible to stay away, no matter what the extenuating circumstances may be.
Awe Levi... call me hun We will do lunch and perhaps discuss alternative custom furniture making!!
Britney what you doing tomorrow? lol I steal need to meet you for lunch. This could be the start of a wonderful affair!!! Originally Posted by levibob56
Never had an affair myself only because I'm too lazy. One relationship is enough of a pain in the ass to keep up with let alone two plus having to keep track of lies. Way too much hassle. Of course I haven't been married forever so it's easy enough to simply end it and meet someone else when the need for a change arrives.
Awe come on guys. Let's get to the nitty gritty good stuff. I want to read some wild novellas!
Hi Britney...I do believe this topic has been discussed in another city's board. Check this out - http://www.eccie.net/showthread.php?t=124407

I'm still in love with my girl, who is one of the popular providers in Dallas area. Because of our schedules and the fact that we live in different cities, it's hard to see each other on a daily basis. However, we do talk at least once a day and text each other several times throughout the day to stay connected.

I think I'm one of the few lucky guys who gets the fantasy girl. But because of the nature of her job, there's a significant amount of jealousy on my part and insecurities.

Not sure how long this relationship would last for us, but at least for me, I'm looking forward to adding many chapters before the end comes.
Yep, I actually always have been the "mistress" type; and in all actuality, when I joined HD, I never intended to take new clients or review. I was a mistress then,and had long term clients.
But, I reviewed 3 weeks later I think, and have always been upfront, if not too much so of my past. I date hobby men (with out compensation because if I am gonna be respected it will be by one of our own community. As far as dating husbands of others, hmmm, I have saved many a marriage from divorce. A good affair is healthy for both in the long run; and I know my place and keep it. I dont want to own him, just borrow him, and send him home
As far as currently, I don't shit where I eat, and do try to keep my heart guarded. There are reasons I am strategic where i advertise, which board, etc... It works great, I just can't get stuck on a man, and I don't-the hobby helps there too.!
austinkboy's Avatar
An affair stemming from the hobby. It started as a provider / client relationship, but progressed into an actual affair. Any other affair is an acceptable topic as well. Originally Posted by BritneyBangs
So when is an affair and affair? I assume that most people here would say that it is not simply sex, but an emotional relationship that needs to exist before it is an affair. In other words, just sex is simply "cheating" and having more than a passing fondness for the other person in addition to the sex might be an "affair". Is a one way "affair" and affair, or does it take two people acting with reciprocity to have an affair?

So there is one born every minute, and I am sucker for getting infatuated. By my admission, I am very fond of my "favorites," so in some sense you might say that I am in love with each one of them in some way, and therefore, in my mind I am having an affair. It may be just an imaginary affair, or fantasy, but it's there. Unilateral, or perhaps shared to some degree. So, I quote myself from another recent thread in coed:

"At first, I paid to see you so I could have sex with you. Now I pay to have sex with you so that I can see you." Originally Posted by austinkboy
Oh wow, I have a great situation that I'm currently dealing with.. It's a novel for sure Britney! I will have to wait till I can type it all out!! Not doing it on my phone! Lets just say, I'm under 25 years old with an SO of 3+ years, and am having an 'affair' with a woman a lot older than I. Wow what a great mess I've dug myself into!
blenderhead's Avatar
No affair.. Yet... I originally started hobbying because I didn't want an affair. No emotions, sounds great! I've recently started reconsidering. The thought of spending the rest of my life in a status quo is depressing. I do need that emotional connection with someone. The hobby takes care of the physical side of things, an affair would be the next step. Although lines get blurred in the hobby, as long as money is involved it's not the same.
af·fair (-fâr)
n.
...
8. A romantic and sexual relationship, sometimes one of brief duration, between two people who are not married to each other.

By this definition, you could argue that any hobby encounter could be considered an affair, or that neither party need be married to consider the relationship an affair. But in my opinion, relationships stemming from the hobby are a different animal altogether than your standard civilian affair.

A relationship crosses the boundary from the hobby and becomes an affair when there is a mutual attraction, a mutual emotional connection... and the exchange of money for time and companionship is no longer taking place.

I enjoy wonderful hobby relationships with many of the gentlemen I've met as a provider. Only once in my provider career have I ever told a "client" that I could no longer accept his money, but wanted to continue to see him. In my case, I don't consider that an affair, because neither one of us were sporting a wedding band. But I digress.

sixxbach's Avatar
Affairs?? Where do I start? I began many affairs when I was in my early 20's. Damn Yahoo. I met plenty of attractive women through chat. It would go from chatting to talking on the phone, etc. This was before myspace, facebook, etc. Picture phones were not the norm then either. I was able to talk to women and then finally meet. Sometimes, a one night stand would occur or sometimes not. I had pretty good luck actually. I had only been captivated twice by a woman who I had an affair with.

Both were Latina actually. The first was a long straight haired, brown, big brown eyes, pretty face, nice ass. She was so sexy. We had talked online and talked on the phone but she dropped out of the loop for a year. I actually found her again online. We finally met. She was so good looking. Her husband did construction work in Dallas, they lived in New Braunfels. I went to pick her up and we went to San Antonio to some club to dance. On the drive back, we began to flirt and I fingered her until we came to her place and did the deed. This went on two more times. I have fond memories of Zilker Park. She gave me a very nice blowjob and she rode me in one of the more secluded areas. Not too long after that, she stopped taking my calls, emails, etc. I always wondered what happened to her.

The other affair I had was from a gal online. She was latina and she knew I was married. J**** is a single mom and really bad luck with men. It did not start as sexual but we exchanged numbers and it went from there. We could talk for hours, very similar sense of humor. She said she was in the military. I did not expect our face meeting to go well. I really expected her to make up some excuse during dinner so she could bail. Well dinner went well, went to baby a's. I ended up pulling over somewhere and ate her pussy so well and she played with my cock. We stayed in touch of course. I spent New Year's day with her in a motel and fucked for a few hours, talked, laughed. This went on a few more times. She ended things because she realized that she would always be the other woman. I really fell for her. We clicked on so many ways that till this I long for her. I found her on facebook and we briefly talked, she moved on with another loser and dropped me off her friends list and has yet to accept another request from me. The crazy thing is that she works about 5 miles from where I work. I really don't like going by that area where she is at because it makes me want to look for her. I think if someway, somehow, we "found each other again", I would leave the hobby and never look back.

This occured before my full time participation in the hobby. That is why I tend to avoid GFE sessions and Latinas in general. Makes me think of things I really don't want to think about.

Affairs never work out the way you want IMO...

sixx