There's 2 sides to every story...

I saw a guy a friend of mine scheduled for me. He was really respectful and we had a great time. He tried to book through my friend again and asked if he could give me a lower rate than my already reasonable special. I told my friend I couldn't because my cab and other expenses (meeting in a nice area) were way more than what he offered. he would have been the only friend to visit that day so I wouldn't have made any type of profit and would have been in the negative that day. I'm low volume anyway so that kind of thing hurts my business. I tried to work with him and asked if he could do a little more and my friend said he didn't like that and was going to tell the guys about it. I don't think its fair because he had a lot of fun the first time and just because I couldn't give him additional specials then that gives him the right to bad mouth me? He told my friend that I could have just asked for more which is exactly what I had my friend do but he already said all he had was 90 bucks. I really try to work with people but it makes things hard when people try to haggle specials and get upset when we won't do it. I just wanted to tell my side of the story because this is ridiculous to me. I respect that this is some of yalls hobby and i treat it as such but this is how I make my income so why should I put myself in the negative just so someone else can enjoy themself. I'm not looking for sympathy or endless comments I just want to let people know my point of view on what happened.
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 07-13-2014, 09:42 PM
Hobbiests are free to negotiate. You are free to refuse or counter offer.

The bottom line is what YOU decide, and no one should take offense if you don't agree to a different rate.

I wouldn't sweat it...no guy is going to get much sympathy from anyone for offering a lower rate & having you refuse.
Dont think anything of it sweets like Toyz said nobody cares about a pissed off guy stomping is foot because he couldnt haggle.

Not to mention if you are already doing special and you only saw him once that gives him no priority for yet lower rates. I woulda told him to look on BP, or theres always Rundburge to go too...

Dont fret about it youll run into many cry babys in this business, do what I do, hand them a diaper wipe and tell them to wipe there own ass cause theres nothing free in this world.
Thank you Toyz and Shayla!!! I was going to ignore it but it really affected my business and I feel like I never even got a real chance here. Everyone has formed their opinions about me without even knowing the full story just because of this person and I won't let people keep thinking I'm a joke. He had a good time and completely flipped because he couldn't afford a date. I don't do bad business and I'm not a "hustler" just a girl trying to make a living like the rest....
Puccipleaser's Avatar
The bottom line is just making sure the good outweighs the bad in this business. Make sure everything is laid out in the beginning during the contact process so both parties aren't caught off guard. If you do that Im sure the good will surpass the bad.
Still Looking's Avatar
Don't worry about what you can't control. Fuckem! Raise your prices... see how he likes that!?
still looking is right, and if he cant afford someone that already has good prices then he shouldnt be in this hobby. Let him stomp is little feet sweetie, one person here isnt going to make or break you. Just do your best and have a great attitude and be a good little fucker,sucker,companion and you will do fine
nuglet's Avatar
I know a lot of guys are different, but I think negotiating for a price FOR ANYTHING. If I can't afford the price for something I want, I have two choices, wait, save money, and get it later, or lower my sights and find something priced in my range.. Cars, houses, tvs, motorcycles etc.. this is the same.
But, to me, it's demeaning to both people in the process. By negotiating, I show I'm either broke, or cheap,... I'm neither. And the person possessing the item I want has a price, why demean them? Instead of a NEW car, maybe it's worth buying a used one to save $10K +, but then again, maybe not.. but don't insult the seller!!! Geeze fella.(s)
In the end it's a business and no one should fault you for making prudent business decisions. There will always be those who feel that in order for them to "win" someone else needs to lose. You learn over time that not all business is worth pursuing. I'd say 85% or more of the guys understand that since they themselves are in business directly or as management.

What separates your business is that for it to work best it needs to feel like it's not business (preferably for both parties). Over the years I've been fortunate to build a few genuine friendships in the hobby but that type of relationship can never be forced.

Be true to yourself and fair to others and let the chips fall as they will...
Centaur's Avatar
I wouldn't sweat it...no guy is going to get much sympathy from anyone for offering a lower rate & having you refuse. Originally Posted by Toyz
And the guy in question probably knows it. Sounds like he was just throwing a tantrum to see if it would get him anywhere. Time to buy stock in diaper wipes. The beuaty of it is that because the OP exercise discretion in not naming him, he can only hurt himself now by making a stink on the board. That's the queen's gambit opening move right there!

But, to me, it's demeaning to both people in the process. By negotiating, I show I'm either broke, or cheap,... I'm neither. And the person possessing the item I want has a price, why demean them? Instead of a NEW car, maybe it's worth buying a used one to save $10K +, but then again, maybe not.. but don't insult the seller!!! Geeze fella.(s) Originally Posted by nuglet
I view the hobby a little differently than I do other expenditures, so I basically agree there and I don't haggle. But in pretty much every other investment, I couldn't (politely) disagree more with your reasoning. Ambit and counter offers are how buyers and sellers signal to each other what value they place on a product or service. It's not an insult for a buyer to signal that they don't place the same value. On the contrary, if buyers merely do or do not buy, but never signal the seller at what price point they would buy, the seller is left to guess for what they can successfully sell their wares. If I buy a house, I am not paying the ambit offer unless it's the same or above what I would have offered to begin with.

This has absolutely nothing to do with being broke or cheap. It has to do with as an adult recognizing the value of a dollar and wanting to accomplish the most with my money. Money is merely a paper or digital chit that I can put to work for me in our trade-based economy. The more wisely I invest it, the more I can do with it. It's that simple. And that's why I'm neither cheap nor broke. If I were to spend more freely simply to maintain the conspicuous illusion of wealth, I would be considerably less wealthy. That is a status anxiety that only the extremely wealthy can afford. Which is fine for them and not something I begrudge those in a position to literally not care about money. I am not trying to pretend to be them. I'm happy with being reasonable flush.

Just my 5¢
cckid2006's Avatar
I don't negotiate, but politely tell them that's too much for me. I do have a budget. Typically, the response is "how much do you have?" I respond that I have the money, but that I have a budget of $X to which most girls agree. In all my years of doing this, I have only had one who was insulted.
I dont have a problem with neg, as long as its not way under rate like there trying to take advantage. Then I am insulted or when they tell me my price is to much and then I see a review and he paid 2twice what I was asking, thats kinda an ass clencher, but hey what can I do about it.
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 07-14-2014, 10:13 PM
I don't negotiate, but politely tell them that's too much for me. I do have a budget. Typically, the response is "how much do you have?" I respond that I have the money, but that I have a budget of $X to which most girls agree. In all my years of doing this, I have only had one who was insulted. Originally Posted by cckid2006
That's pretty much how I approach it. I've had a couple of girls who were offended, and I get how they might be. But I'm never rude about it or devaluing the person, or offer a really ridiculous rate.. "Heres what I've got to spend if you are interested", sometimes that's what the girl is asking-sometimes its less. If she doesn't want to play at that rate, no one needs get hurt feelings...'cause there are other options for us both.

I like the way A.D. says she handled this one, considered the offer-asked if he could do a bit more. That's when he could have sweetened the pot a bit & they both might have come out happy & satisfied instead of upset with each other.
I know a lot of guys are different, but I think negotiating for a price FOR ANYTHING. If I can't afford the price for something I want, I have two choices, wait, save money, and get it later, or lower my sights and find something priced in my range.. Cars, houses, tvs, motorcycles etc.. this is the same.
But, to me, it's demeaning to both people in the process. By negotiating, I show I'm either broke, or cheap,... I'm neither. And the person possessing the item I want has a price, why demean them? Instead of a NEW car, maybe it's worth buying a used one to save $10K +, but then again, maybe not.. but don't insult the seller!!! Geeze fella.(s) Originally Posted by nuglet
Can I sell you a house?
nuglet's Avatar
Can I sell you a house? Originally Posted by CedarParkFriend
Probably, I have 7 already.. lol. But since they voided the option of "Stated Income", I haven't bought anymore..
I understand what you're saying though.. I've just never been the type to negotiate... not saying I'm not an idiot, but I just don't do it.
If I want it, and can afford it, I don't question the price.. if it's too high, I just don't buy it.. but for whatever reason, I don't dicker on price..
So it's too high, they don't sell it to me, maybe to someone else.