This ought to be pretty easy.
"I'm not vouching for a guy I haven't seen within the last X months. I haven't seen SomeGuy in that time, so I canno verify him for you."
Originally Posted by Sir Lancehernot
I understand Alexis. If you're not comfortable in giving a reference you certainly don't have to.
I haven't seen anyone since August of 2018, but I'm keeping up with Eccie and P411 for at least a year, because I enjoy it and want to keep up with people I like, AND for giving references.
I'll give a reference from 2011,
IF I still have the info on the client. Some of my records are from an old phone that doesn't work but I still have most. So I CERTAINLY tell the lady I haven't seen this client since blah blah something, and he probably has more current references. But I go ahead and give her the info on my experiences with him; it doesn't hurt anything. As long as I make sure she knows it was a year or more ago that we met and he may be nothing like he used to be or may even be a different person.
But if it's the same handle and same phone number, and if the client was a frequent visitor of mine, why not? As long as she knows when I last saw him, and I think most ladies are aware that people can change. And even in the course of a few days or a week, a client can behave well with two providers to use as good references, and then treat the 3rd girl horribly! I see alerts on that all the time, and the women used as refs, always say they are sorry, that he treated them very well, and they won't vouch for him anymore.
So we all have many ways to screen, of course, but a ref from a well known provider who knows the client well can be beneficial. But it also makes sense to not want to vouch for a client you haven't seen in 6 mths. Entirely up to you, each provider can do as she wishes of course. But it might be better to not come off as so negative and angry, and just say, "I think I saw him with no problems, but it's been too long, I don't have records. Anything over 6 mths I don't give references for." You could copy and paste something like that in every reference request you get; over 6 mths." Or the great response that Sir Lancehernot gave you.
The ladies will understand, many have similar policies.
I just don't get all the anger in your post. And accusing ladies of not caring about their safety? No. They're just using all the resources they can to screen a client and you don't know what the client told them about when you last met.