do references expire?

Ok. I don't get to hobby that often due to circumstances, but when I do get the chance, most providers require references that are recent.

So my question(s), at what point do you stop using a provider as a reference becuase its been too long since you've seen her?

Ladies, if a guy has reputable provider references (or p411 ok's) but they are at least a year old, do you even consider those as valid references?

Peace

1. Ask the new woman how far back in time of a reference she will accept.

2. Ask your past providers how long before your reference becomes "stale". go see them again, say 1-2x a year at least.

Oh, and i hope your past providers dont "expire"!

Thx for the advice!

Poor choice of words on my part.

If it's a lady I personally know, and she vividly remembers you, maybe. Otherwise, does a quarterback from 1984 still get first draft pick in 2014? People and curcumstances change...

I would think that if your ref cant be contacted then it's pretty much out of date. And if she can be contacted and doesn't remember you, out of date. Moral of the story? Do like some of these dudes and play pokemon! "Gotta Catch em all!" Lol!

My opinion only….but if I haven't seen a gentleman in 6 months and he has seen 5 other ladies since then, why use me as a reference?

Not that I mind, but if it's been that long and I have only seen him once, I will usually tell the lady to ask for more current references.

I have some friends who pretty much only see me, for a year or longer. Or, have seen me but its been a long time or they can't hobby because of real world etc... I gladly give them references and I ALWAYS tell the new provider if it has been a long time since the last visit. It is relevant information I think she should have.

"Yes, I saw JoeSchmoe. He was a total gentleman when we met once/many times a while back. It has been more than X months since our last visit, so I can't comment on how much has changed. Stay safe. Let me know if there is anything else you need. Z"

(kinda a rough of what a reference would be from me in a situation like that)

My opinion only….but if I haven't seen a gentleman in 6 months and he has seen 5 other ladies since then, why use me as a reference?

Not that I mind, but if it's been that long and I have only seen him once, I will usually tell the lady to ask for more current references. Originally Posted by Reese Foster

Reputability could be the answer.

If you've got a gent that TOFTT more often than not, and you were the most reputable woman he's seen in 6 months, I'm contacting you. Otherwise, he has to be screened in another way.

The ability to use me as a reference expires after 6 months. But if you are a regular friend, I could see extending that to a year. I've had gents try to use me YEARS after meeting me. Those gents got told a thing or two.

Ok. I don't get to hobby that often due to circumstances, but when I do get the chance, most providers require references that are recent.

So my question(s), at what point do you stop using a provider as a reference becuase its been too long since you've seen her?

Ladies, if a guy has reputable provider references (or p411 ok's) but they are at least a year old, do you even consider those as valid references?

Peace Originally Posted by fryec

If I have not seen a guy in 3months I will NO longer be a reference for him.
I will take P4 okays that are at least one year old.

I don't hobby all that often and I don't always write a review. I have had a few Ladies give me a hard time about it and I have had to find someone they knew personally to verify me. Then again most never even ask for a reference if I contact them through here.

I don't hobby all that often and I don't always write a review. I have had a few Ladies give me a hard time about it and I have had to find someone they knew personally to verify me. Then again most never even ask for a reference if I contact them through here. Originally Posted by slingblade

Then you're most definitely contacting the wrong ladies. A lady should respect your choice not to review, but more importantly you should be concerned that a lady is not screening you. See my blog post below. I would definitely get screened by one of the more reputable ladies here, and see how that fares for you.

Then you're most definitely contacting the wrong ladies. A lady should respect your choice not to review, but more importantly you should be concerned that a lady is not screening you. See my blog post below. I would definitely get screened by one of the more reputable ladies here, and see how that fares for you. Originally Posted by Tiffani Jameson

Sorry, I did not word that right. The lack of reviews and no recent P411 okay is why they are hesitant to see me I believe. I think that the screening is being done off my reviews that are on here. I am a little concerned about no screening also, for both of our safety. I am pretty selective about whom I see so I think they must do some type of screening that I am not aware of.

This is the reason I have decided to only see p411 ladies. The okays go a long way, especially from a reputable provider!

Reputability could be the answer.

If you've got a gent that TOFTT more often than not, and you were the most reputable woman he's seen in 6 months, I'm contacting you. Otherwise, he has to be screened in another way. Originally Posted by Tiffani Jameson

Makes sense…"blonde moment" on my part, I suppose.

Although, if I have only seen a gentleman one time and 6 or more months later he is using me as a reference, I will tell the lady my experience with him, but still suggest that she asks him for a more current ref.