Some newbie questions (yeah, I know, silly newbs)

I am a total newb with no prior experience in this, but I'm ready to give it a try. Divorce has forever burned me on traditional relationships. I want to avoid making an idiot of myself or creating an uncomfortable situation for either of us. I also realize the best way to have a good experience is to be a considerate customer. I've already done some homework and been looking through the ECCIE profile pages and reviews, have been browsing backpage, and read this "how to call an escort service guide":
http://sex.perkel.com/escort/
and read this similar newbie thread:
http://eccie.net/showthread.php?t=418943
So I think I've got the basics (treat her like a hot date: be polite, respectful, clean, and prompt, and no one has to tell me not to talk explicit details and prices on the phone, as that just seems common sense). However, I have a few questions I would like clarification on.
First, a biggie: if the advertised rate is, say, $250/hr, is that what to bring (or to have handy for an outcall), or is that just covering the agency fee, and the "tip" is above that?
And second, and other details not obvious that I should know (such as how to tactfully handle the cash - like put it in an envelope and drop it on a table, etc).
Thought of one more thing: if they list an e-mail address, is it acceptable to initiate contact via e-mail, or is phone always the way to go (I do realize that hearing how a person speaks to them can help a woman better gauge a potential client).

Thanks for your patience in helping a guy learn the ropes! Hopefully I can manage to become the type of client a girl won't mind a repeat visit from (and I can avoid any embarrassing rookie mistakes that could cause me or her to have a negative experience)!

First, a biggie: if the advertised rate is, say, $250/hr, is that what to bring (or to have handy for an outcall), or is that just covering the agency fee, and the "tip" is above that?
And second, and other details not obvious that I should know (such as how to tactfully handle the cash - like put it in an envelope and drop it on a table, etc).
Thought of one more thing: if they list an e-mail address, is it acceptable to initiate contact via e-mail, or is phone always the way to go (I do realize that hearing how a person speaks to them can help a woman better gauge a potential client). Originally Posted by dothed

1) If $250 is advertised, that is what you should expect to pay. If she asks for more, that is considered to be an upsell hustle, and is strongly frowned upon in our community. Some less reputable girls still use this approach. Of course, you can always tip if you have a good time and would like to, but again, a tip should never be demanded or asked for by the lady you visit.

2) Money should not be handed to a lady during your visit. Don't even talk about it. If in her place, have it in an envelope and just conspicuously put it down somewhere near by where she will obviously see it. If she is coming to your place, put it by the bathroom sink and ask her to please feel free to freshen up in the bathroom as soon as she arrives. This will allow her to collect (and count it) where she doesn't have to do it right in front of you. It seems nicer that way.

3) I think it is better to contact by way of PM or email first. Sometimes you can arrange everything this way, but often you will need to talk on the phone too. Let them know you will be calling to finalize the plans and give them the number you will be calling from so they can quickly verify your call. Many ladies don't like to even give out their number until they check up on you (screen you) and have that initial contact by way of PM.

Hope this helps some. Stay smart and be safe. Be nice to the girls and they will do the same to you. Good luck.

Thank you so much for the very specific answers, willro! I'm sure the first attempt will still be nerve wracking for me. :-)

One final question regarding tipping. If I should choose to leave a tip beyond the agreed rate at the end of the visit, is there a best protocol for handling that? I.e. is it okay to just hand her the tip with some sort of verbal disclaimer like "I enjoyed our time, let me pay for your gas" or something similar, or does that likewise need to be handled in a more discrete manner?

Well it depends. If they list an email I will email first out of respect for her. I always ask permission before texting or calling. Just like I do to all women. Once I know she is ok with texting or calling then I figure out when I can see her and what her schedule is. Honestly I just approach it like I would any girl.

As far as donation goes, I may bring more just in case. There is no ryme or reason for me to leave a tip. I might also give donation up front or after. Again, no ryme or reason for that either. But I guess if you are meeting someone new then it could probably make her feel more comfortable getting it up front. Only one time did I have a woman ask me to leave the donation on a counter when I tried to hand it to her. But that was the first time we met. After that I could hand it to her no problem. Then again, other times I just flat out handed it to her and she accepted it that way. I didn't think anything of it, and obviously they did not either because they had no problem accepting me handing it to them.

On tipping If after I talk to them and get a sense about them I may go ahead and give the tip up front. After that When I know I am going to have a mind blowing experience I include the tip everytime. Im not sure who you are planning on visiting but if you see Brittany then do yourself a favor and bring a tip. You will walk away wondering if she is that into you or if she is a golden globe actress. She has skills, so dont kid yourself. I am trying to move my schedule out to see Monroe but work and social life seem to be getting in the way...soon...maby. Anyway I treat them like women I date, which I guess some could and would say is overstepping things but oh well I cant help it. I do what I do, and it works for me. You may find a different way works best for you.

One final question regarding tipping. If I should choose to leave a tip beyond the agreed rate at the end of the visit, is there a best protocol for handling that? I.e. is it okay to just hand her the tip with some sort of verbal disclaimer like "I enjoyed our time, let me pay for your gas" or something similar, or does that likewise need to be handled in a more discrete manner? Originally Posted by dothed

I think that sounds like a very nice way to do it. After you are more comfortable with each other at the end of the date, the protocol can be more relaxed. She should have her suspicious about potential "entrapment intentions" relieved by this point. Most of the time you can just talk like friends at this point.

Welcome Dothead
Another helpful one .http://www.eccie.net/showthread.php?...tives+hobbying

Good Luck and have fun!

.

Dothead, I highly recommend you join preferred411.com. They give membership based on employment screening. Your chances of landing a first date with p411 membership are a lot better than without.

Sweet N Little, I'll definitely read through that thread. I appreciate the info!
Ginger Doll, thanks for the suggestion. I'll look into a p411 membership. Anything to help make the experience smoother is good!

Everyone else, thank you very much for the helpful feedback. I feel far more educated about the process now (and thus far less likely to commit a faux pas)!

One final question: how far ahead is it normally necessary to book? A few hours, a few days, etc. I'll admit I'm excited and ready to get started! :-)

...One final question: how far ahead is it normally necessary to book? A few hours, a few days, etc. I'll admit I'm excited and ready to get started! :-) Originally Posted by dothed

It all depends on the situation and the lady. For me, the time-consuming hurdle is the screening process. Once we've taken care of that, I can meet in as little as 2 hours! Assuming that I don't already have plans, of course.

Lol, I know I said one final question (yarg!), but one more thing occurred to me. I know the two big no-nos not to ever mention when contacting a lady, but is it permissible to mention ECCIE, bp, or p411 by name when making contact?

All have contributed good advice, dothed. P411, getting references so it will be easier to see the upscale ladies, etc.

Let me add Research to the mix. You've already gotten a good start by lurking and reading. What might not be so obvious is the difference in the ladies in the ECCIE community and those traveling and advertising here are for the most part, top tier providers. By top tier, I'm describing those who are gfe and truly understand offering the illusion of passion, understand the importance of screening (knowing who's safe and reputable), and provide good, reliable , umm customer service for lack of a better term.

In order to decide who you want to see, Research is also in order - Showcases, Reviews (including the Rest of the Story), participation on the board, Reviews on other sites and even back channel questions of other dawgs who know the provider. I'd recommend you purchase Premium Access in order to view the Rest of the Story in the reviews to learn more of the details on a specific provider's menu and an idea of the type experience to expect.

You've mentioned BP. With a few exceptions, BP ladies are not on the same level as you might come to expect here. It's very likely you could get fake pix, cash and dash, non-gfe and a covered blow job, all with the attention of your partner reading the newspaper or watching television while you do her doggie. Yes, you will see some ECCIE verified providers advertising there, but generally speaking if it's too good to be true, it probably is.

Frankly, many of that bunch do no screening whatsoever. When that happens, the hair on the back of my neck raises and my radar goes off. If they aren't screening, be careful. If they don't care enough to know who they are seeing and know they are safe, I'm not sure I want to see them.

There's much, much more. Never be afraid to ask. Have fun. Play Safe.

Thanks again! And MrHappy4u, you make good points about BP. P411 application submitted! Guess that's my first step towards heading down the rabbit hole to wonderland. :-)

P411 is great and will help you a lot, glad you are joining. Many ladies want references, and that is understandable, but you can get into a catch 22 situation. When you start looking around on P411 you will find ladies who are "newbie friendly". Make a date with one or two of these ladies, treat them nice and respectfully and they will be your references so you can enjoy wonderland. Good luck, be safe, and have fun.

P.S. Get you a few references on P411, make some posts on here, get established well and get to be known in the community then contact Ginger she is a great lady I promise.

Thanks, Horserider! You're a great guy, too.

P411 verify passed! I've sent a pre-screening request to a few girls on p411 that listed "newbie friendly", so...patience. :-)

And Horserider, suggestion noted. ;-) Ginger seems very sweet.

Any suggestions on forums that are newb friendly for meet&greet and casual conversation?

This has turned into a pretty good "how to get started for newbs" thread, with a lot of info and useful links to other places where newb questions have been answered.

This seems like a very good, respectful community, which is a refreshing change of pace from the usual internet flame-fests.