How much contact before a session?

koseylee's Avatar
In a recent post about a NC/NS I noticed the OP stating he had "been texting her for several days about attire, activities...blah, blah, blah...". Then at the last minute she went silent.

My first thought was...maybe she got tired of him bugging the shit outta her.

This makes me wonder...How much contact is appropriate before a first session w/a provider?

When I set a date w/a provider for the FIRST time ,I will text to confirm correct contact number and maybe get general area if it's incall. If her level of service isn't clear in her ad or post that is clarified before date is set (usually by PM or email). After that I will contact the day before to confirm we are still good to go if the session was set several days before. The day of I will confirm, make any attire requests, and set a time for final confirm and to get address. From there it's the usual 2 call/text system...on my way...here.

The way I look at is...the lady doesn't know me from Adam. Last thing she needs is some needy dickwad taking up her time. Besides that, too many questions about activities and such could make me come across as possible LE. After we have met, if we click, it may be different.

I would like to hear what the ladies think on this.
AlluringStacy's Avatar
i dont mind if you call me 3 days or a day before the actual date for a multi hr thi ng.But please dont bug me for a week ans half over a hhr session and expect me to tell u about my activities everytime you ask throught the week. No i don't have the time all week for u to sit there and txt you about how fun its going to be for 30mins, im just saying .
Sounds about right.

Contact 1-Screening
Contact 2-Number Exchange(special request)
Contact 3-Day before confirmation
Contact 4 Day of about 2 hours before confirm then on my way and here
I won't do it, anything you want to say.. Tell me in person.
The one time a guy contacted me obsessively before an appointment, I went against my gut and saw him anyway. Even though he quite literally never shut up!
So many emails BEFORE we even met.
He struck me as so so incredibly lonely.

The moment the session was over, he again begun to obsessively contact me.. When I did not respond (because I was at a FAMILY REUNION, which he knew but still emailed me 15 times in two hours.. How are you? Wanna play golf soon? How are you? Why aren't you answering? Are you ok etc )
it made him mad that I did not answer, and I got the ONLY no/negative review I've ever received.
Nope.. Lesson learned.. Now I won't even see someone that contacts me too much before.
I just cut it off.
Burn me once, shame on you, burn me twice, shame on me.
Because of him, I don't give out my number freely because it encourages communication.
Just tell me in person.
I don't need a negative review because I did not respond fast enough or agree to meet you out for a non-paid date...
Just tell me in person...
Phone is turned off 24/7 so I don't offend anyone, it's just off for everyone.
Sure wish it didn't have to be that way.
My thoughts on too much conversation:

(Also applicable for too little conversation, like, "What's up? Where u at? Let's Meet. I'll be there in 5.")

I think its ok if its not all day long, but I am not gonna sit there and explain details so you can whack off to pics or something, but to get a client you have to show that you want that client and show client appreciation, and those clients will be repeat. If there was no client we wouldn't have this profession
Scribe's Avatar
I think it's a matter of preferences, and I could see both sides...

Look, there are people who want this - quick, clean and simple. That's their choice, right and preference. I've met providers who just want to do their thing, get paid, and get on with their lives - alone and away from clients. There's nothing wrong with that...

I know some of my guy friends who are like "Show up, throw up, pay up, and get the fuck out of Dodge!".

However, for some (and I tend to walk this path, and I'll apologize profusely for any provider I've made feel - bothered, time infringed, or put upon..). but I like to get a feel for the personality; because IOP aside - there is a "click thing" that for me is important.

So, it does take a few (brief guys... I'm specific) BRIEF messages with someone new before I feel inclined to schedule... They are usually playful, not "menu! pictures! etc". It's to see if they can smile and not take life, or themselves, too seriously.

Humor, a little flirting, and a joke shared - is sexy and puts everyone at ease.

However, my usual is 1.5hrs minimum to a few hours; and I don't look for "bargains". I actually do pay for the time, and I figure the rest - while usually outstanding, is just frosting on the cake. If someone (and this is my own opinion) is "too busy for a little pre-banter"... then they are probably not what (me alone) "I" am searching for...
Matter of preferences and depends on guy and gal.
I remember one gal we exchanged pm about 3 or 4 times, after I felt we clicked, I actually bumped my date to 2 hours plus.
Huge praises on her because majority of gals would have thought I was a time waster and seen her ever since. She is perfection from tcb, personality to looks!
I make contact and set up a date provided they even respond then confirm 24 hrs before and that is it really.
Some gals you get along with better and vice versa. I tend to book 1 week in advance and sometimes to most gals it seems like a long time, reason being, so I can get a date locked in without last minute requests.
koseylee's Avatar
I think it's a matter of preferences, and I could see both sides...

Look, there are people who want this - quick, clean and simple. That's their choice, right and preference. I've met providers who just want to do their thing, get paid, and get on with their lives - alone and away from clients. There's nothing wrong with that...

I know some of my guy friends who are like "Show up, throw up, pay up, and get the fuck out of Dodge!".

However, for some (and I tend to walk this path, and I'll apologize profusely for any provider I've made feel - bothered, time infringed, or put upon..). but I like to get a feel for the personality; because IOP aside - there is a "click thing" that for me is important.

So, it does take a few (brief guys... I'm specific) BRIEF messages with someone new before I feel inclined to schedule... They are usually playful, not "menu! pictures! etc". It's to see if they can smile and not take life, or themselves, too seriously.

Humor, a little flirting, and a joke shared - is sexy and puts everyone at ease.

However, my usual is 1.5hrs minimum to a few hours; and I don't look for "bargains". I actually do pay for the time, and I figure the rest - while usually outstanding, is just frosting on the cake. If someone (and this is my own opinion) is "too busy for a little pre-banter"... then they are probably not what (me alone) "I" am searching for... Originally Posted by Scribe
Well put Scribe. If you can see both sides, then you get what I'm saying.
Luke Skywalker's Avatar
I think it's a matter of preferences, and I could see both sides...

Look, there are people who want this - quick, clean and simple. That's their choice, right and preference. I've met providers who just want to do their thing, get paid, and get on with their lives - alone and away from clients. There's nothing wrong with that...

I know some of my guy friends who are like "Show up, throw up, pay up, and get the fuck out of Dodge!".

However, for some (and I tend to walk this path, and I'll apologize profusely for any provider I've made feel - bothered, time infringed, or put upon..). but I like to get a feel for the personality; because IOP aside - there is a "click thing" that for me is important.

So, it does take a few (brief guys... I'm specific) BRIEF messages with someone new before I feel inclined to schedule... They are usually playful, not "menu! pictures! etc". It's to see if they can smile and not take life, or themselves, too seriously.

Humor, a little flirting, and a joke shared - is sexy and puts everyone at ease.

However, my usual is 1.5hrs minimum to a few hours; and I don't look for "bargains". I actually do pay for the time, and I figure the rest - while usually outstanding, is just frosting on the cake. If someone (and this is my own opinion) is "too busy for a little pre-banter"... then they are probably not what (me alone) "I" am searching for... Originally Posted by Scribe
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That
It's one thing to exchange a few messages, but it's another thing when you send a girl multiple messages every single day for a week or so leading up to the date just to confirm over and over again if she is going to show up. that is a bit much and would make anyone not want to see a guy.
jdkees's Avatar
I tried setting up a multi hour and had it all arranged until something fell through on my end. I messaged the provider and asked for confirmation on a raincheck and that line of contact has effectively gone dark. As in they don't even appear to be reading my last message asking one time after the original cancellation/raincheck request for confirmation on whether a raincheck is available.

At this point I've pretty much written off that opportunity, which is unfortunate to me (but I'm sure they won't starve for attention). Oh wells.

Sometimes it's worth it to follow up and other times you're just going to get put on the ignore list. I guess that's just how things go.
  • anita
  • 05-17-2015, 10:34 PM
1. Make appointment
2. One introduction phone call is fine. Should not be more than 15 minutes.
3. Texting to confirm appointment, make personal requests or inquire about shoe size etc is fine.
4. Wait for the day of appointment to call/text again

If you want to text all day and night, and see naughty my teasing pics at work, I have a rate for that ;-).
i dont mind if you call me 3 days or a day before the actual date for a multi hr thi ng.But please dont bug me for a week ans half over a hhr session and expect me to tell u about my activities everytime you ask throught the week. No i don't have the time all week for u to sit there and txt you about how fun its going to be for 30mins, im just saying . Originally Posted by AlluringStacy
Sorry this comes with the territory ladies...some guys just think they are SPECIAL....

And Stacy, since you posted in the Dallas forums, it is a requirement that you visit here...mmmmmmm
  • Gbfsl
  • 05-18-2015, 05:48 AM
I have always liked a nice e-mail exchange with those ladies I plan to see more than once. It just helped me build more of the GFE I like. But, I hear more and more from providers on these kind of threads that it is a negative rather than a positive thing. So I am trying real hard to stop my habbit of e-mailing profusely and only send one for an appointment, a confirmation, and, of course, a "thank you" for a job well done. :-)