Odd or Funny pre-visit preparations

Have any of you got stories about odd or funny pre-visit preparations?

I don't mean the obvious, like shower, manscaping, shaving, etc. I mean things one wouldn't usually think about.

I have two personal examples that you may laugh about:

1. I ironed my underwear once. I was out of town in a hotel and I really overpacked my bag. Everything was crammed in around heavy electronics and was very wrinkled. I broke out the ironing board for my shirt and pants, turned it on and then went to get clothes.

Once I found everything my boxers were so wrinkled they basically we staying wadded up. They looked really funny, so I took them off and ironed them because I was self-conscious.

2. Listening to Eye of the Tiger pre-session. I had set up an appointment with probably the most attractive provider I had set an appointment with at that time. Her PM's back and fourth were very clear and concise, and everything went great. Too great. It's like she was on another level or something. I started getting nervous. She was really hot too. I was in the car on the way to her incall and my MP3 player was on random. Eye of the Tiger came on and I felt so much better I put it on replay and listened to it two more times before I got there. lol.


Do you guys or gals have similar stories or am I just a nerd who needs to keep shit like this to myself?
Luvyduvy's Avatar
Well, this was funny as hell... not sure it is in category of 'pre-visit preparations'. I was in Tampa seeing one of my atf's Suzy - at the time (only saw her once 2 years before) not sure she would recognize me nor me her... a blonde vision strolls through the doors and every head snaps... she comes right up to me, kisses me, grabs my hand as she whispers, 'everyone is looking, let's get to the elevators NOW!' - we do, and once inside, we get into a teenage makeout fest for the ages... I'm thinking, will this elevator EVER get to my floor? finally the doors open and we are ready to sprint to the room when we see 7 or 8 people ready to get on and smiling, those that realize are laughing... we were still on the lobby level having forgot to push any floor button when we first got on - we started laughing so hard... one guy in the crowd said, 'you two go on, just push the damn button' - nobody else got on and we laughed so hard we cried... the rest was a really great time.
roaringfork's Avatar
When I pull into the amp parking lot, I always have some Wagner blasting from my truck at full volume (like that cool surfin' colonel in Apocalypse Now).
I usually make the sign of the cross and say my prayers
Clouddancer's Avatar
Of course, the usual showering, manscaping, flossing, brushing, etc. followed by a few sets of Lip-ups, tongue curls, and hi rotations are all part of the pre-game warm-up routine.

Luvyduvy, funny story. I did the very same thing with a lovely lady in London. Funny thing was the lobby bar patrons also noticed through the glass elevator and were pointing and laughing at us.
roaringfork's Avatar
I usually make the sign of the cross and say my prayers Originally Posted by Zabrina Sarafina
That is soooo freakin' hot.
pyramider's Avatar
I wake up.
I stretch!
Samantha Thom-- I probably should start doing that....

Here's another one:

One day during pre-visit prep I told my boss, on purpose. I was at work, by myself I thought, and I had an appointment that evening. I popped onto eccie, then her website etc. "doing intel" right, I was just ogling cans because I was exited.

Anyway, my boss (who doesn't even work in this building) poped up behind me and says "are you looking at porn?"

I tell him, "Uh no, of course not, this is an escort site, I'm just doing research so when I have my date later, I can be sure I don't go to jail and miss work tomorrow".

To which he replied "Oh, OK, carry on then". I work in a pretty male sexist workplace, but I have a feeling he thought I was just being a smartass getting caught looking at porn, but the next day he asked how my night went, and I said " it went great, what's up". and we never talked about it again.
put on some girl on girl porn and masturbate
put on some girl on girl porn and masturbate Originally Posted by midgetwrestler
Or in my case....put on some guy on guy porn and masturbate.
KeepinItReal's Avatar
Or in my case....put on some guy on guy porn and masturbate. Originally Posted by Reese Foster
Damn and all this time I thought you were thinking of my hard COCK when you masturbate
Brass Balls's Avatar
I load up on liquids!
theboss21422's Avatar
I get in a 15 to 30 minute workout and take those Gatorade energy chews before my session
Eat plenty of Garlic, Onions, Brussell Sprouts, Asparagus, Tuna, Calamari, Cabbage, and Ranch Style Beans.

Make sure haven't changed skid marked tighty whiteys with the yellow stains on the front after a 45 minute workout on a treadmill after eating items above.

Have 5 o'clock shadow on face and jungle pubes.

$100-$250 in rolls of pennies to pay for session.

Let the Romance Begin!!