PUTRID ASS

Because this is so damning, and because she's only one good shower away from turning awful into mediocre, I won't post the link here on this site. Let's just say she's posting on BP as a Visiting Brunette. She was nice enough, is the lady in the ad, but was significantly older than the listed age. Overall, it was more like a bad Asian-du-jour experience, although she is Latin. She is petite, and her body is good for her age, but it doesn't matter. Shit, she could be Kate Upton, I'd still wanna vomit.

I've hobbied for years, and have been fortunate enough to avoid a certain experience. Until now...

Fast-forward: She's getting ready for the reverse-cowgirl approach. She gets on, and... What the fuck was that? What did I just see in her ass? I spread her cheeks. What the? Is that... toilet paper?? Smeared up in her ass? Like all around? Was she JUST taking a shit as I knocked on the door?

We're in her nice hotel room, how does she not clean her ass before I get here? She said I was her first guy of the day? How did she not shower? She's an older, experienced woman, how the fuck does she not know to CLEAN HER ASS?

Nothing kills libido faster than a rotten odor. What hole it originates from doesn't matter. I couldn't decide if I wanted to puke or leave, or both. The whole bed now smelled like ass. It was bad. PTSD-inducing bad.

I couldn't get it up. All I could think about was her filthy ass. How the fuck?? We're talking fetid swamp ass. How does a PROFESSIONAL not clean her ass? She had gray roots, and spoke about being in the business for years. She's old enough to know better.

I wanted to leave. I just wanted to grab my clothes and run the fuck outta there. Reluctantly, I let her start-and-finish me with a hand. I needed to get something positive out of this. But I couldn't focus. With that odor, we could have been in a porta-potty. Somehow, I get some load on her. Then I shower. Her? NO SHOWER!! She gets dressed in the same clothes. WHAT THE FUCK?? How does she not smell her own ass? And I just came on her? She doesn't fucking shower? I could have simply jerked off on a manure pile, would have saved myself $150.

She talks about herself, and all I can think about is her rancid ass. I get dressed. And all I could think about is the toilet paper stuck in her ass. She's standing there talking, and she still has that toilet paper up her ass. Literally up her ass.

After being there for a Motherfuckers!-why-did-I-just-do-that 20 minutes, I left and immediately killed myself. Or wish I did.

Welcome back Franko

PK

As a public or pubic service announcement to my many friends (ladies and guys) in the hobby world, I am going to give you some important advice. In order to avoid potentially embarrassing moments, I always wash my ass after "dropping kids off at the pool". It only takes a minute and the results are sure to please anyone with acute olfactory senses; just sit on edge of the tub and push the water up your ass to flush out any excess crap. Add a little soap to smell really fresh. Voila!

Reads just like him. Amazing that he continues to play this out this way. And why? For what reason? Leaves me wondering, and considering ditching this board. The banning of senior RESPECTED MEMBERS of this board, and little policing of this reckless frivolity make me seriously consider sharing any intel regarding exploits.

Reads just like him. Amazing that he continues to play this out this way. And why? For what reason? Leaves me wondering, and considering ditching this board. The banning of senior RESPECTED MEMBERS of this board, and little policing of this reckless frivolity make me seriously consider sharing any intel regarding exploits. Originally Posted by Wiblet

HOLY SHIT!!
I could NOT have said it better myself!

Thanks for restoring my faith brother! Seriously!
Peace
PK

Reads just like him. Amazing that he continues to play this out this way. And why? For what reason? Leaves me wondering, and considering ditching this board. The banning of senior RESPECTED MEMBERS of this board, and little policing of this reckless frivolity make me seriously consider sharing any intel regarding exploits. Originally Posted by Wiblet

Why do this type of shit? Some people are truly pathetic individuals and have to do something...make that anything to appear interesting. I can only imagine what his real life is like. There is a mental illness diagnosis called borderline personality disorder. Meds do help.

so chase him off yet again WTF
Its better than overly selling by iggy
Lets say Zip gave a link, so all would be sure who
that would be better than say
you all went to see the same gal
she sat on you're face a bit before going 69
and now you all have shit on nose

just thinking

The banning of senior RESPECTED MEMBERS of this board, and little policing of this reckless frivolity make me seriously consider sharing any intel regarding exploits. Originally Posted by Wiblet

We don't ban anyone from here, they ban themselves when they cannot or refuse to follow the rules and guidelines of the site. The same guidelines that everyone agrees to abide by when they signup an account here. There is a link to them on the left side of every single page across the entire site.
http://www.eccie.net/announcement.php?f=5

They are not very respected in my book if they won't live up to the agreement they made when signing up an account here.

You're giving Frank way too much credit. Only Spitzer writes in this style.

Not looking for ANY drama. Please let's just be adults here.

Ding ding! Welcome Back....again

Ugh

Ugh

Originally Posted by Nate2422

ahhh you know that not good for the keyboard
try a wall, brick is best and fastest

ahhh you know that not good for the keyboard
try a wall, brick is best and fastest Originally Posted by offshoredrilling

That's why I buy them in bulk.

I'm still using a keyboard that came with a
IBM PS/2 (Model 30-286)

You're giving Frank way too much credit. Only Spitzer writes in this style.

Not looking for ANY drama. Please let's just be adults here. Originally Posted by Zippity

I second the motion for 'No drama'.
But I must ask, why post that shitty story (see what I did there ) if drama is not the intent? The alert appreciated, but the telling was in fact, quite dramatic...no?



peace
PK