How can I make This STOP?

Over the last few months I have been dealing with a situation I thought I had control of. We have seen each other professionally several times. In this business I have gotten used to all the lines so when he would say how beautiful he thinks I am or how he could take me away from all the things bad in my life etc, I just thought it was the normal talk I always hear. Then it changed to we was meant to be with each other and he would do whatever it took to be with me. At that point I realized that he was not like everyone else and I didn't see him professionally any more.

That's where it all started. I get 200-500 texts and emails a day, I block one phone number and then he calls from a different one. He is A ECCIE member and sends me messages and on any account he knows that I have. He has now started to send me messages about stuff like what I am wearing and places I have been during the day. It is affecting my life and I don't know how to fix it or make it stop!!

I am scared to even answer the phone sometimes or check my in box. And I am always looking behind me to see if I am being followed or watched. Its even hard for me to see anyone in fear that it is him being sneaky or that he is watching. I feel like I am in a Lifetime movie that I don't want to be in!

Please if anyone has been in this situation or has any advise please message me.
:-(
See a lawyer. Don't edit out your profession when speaking to said lawyer. Have him suggest a legal course of action.

Also, name and shame.
First I would post in ladies powder room....I'm sure you'll get some great advice there

Second, don't give in to his bs...ignore, ignore, ignore

Third let the Mods know about him

Fourth if ya get somone new calling....screen and references don't see anyone new without checking, which hopefully you do anyway?

And finally out the guy on this thread....he wants you to play the role of the victim, don't play into his hand...not saying you are now

I'm sure some of the more experience ladies will give ya some better advice

Send PM's to folks like Ms E????? Allie???? for further advice
that is really scary! i hope you figure it out. i agree with amaranth...
Thats stalking and harrassment, you need to get it under control instantly. If he cant understand that and continues he has a major problem and you need someone that can help you. Just my advice, dont think you can handle this alone and seek some professional advice. I wish you the best!!
KCSmutMonkey's Avatar
That sucks hun. Hopefully, this post alone and the threat of outing him causes him to back off. If not, out away!
ElumEno's Avatar
First off DO NOT post any of his text, pm's or email anywhere in the open forums,
but do send any of ECCIE pm's that prove what you are saying to mods Adeptus32, modda or email them to kansas@eccie.net.

It sounds to me like a clear violation of this guideline...
#17 - "Cyber Stalking" is a term that refers to the act of following another member around online. This may include persistent PMing of the other party, repeated ISOs about the other party, or excessive bumping of reviews or posting in threads about the other individual, whether it be positive or negative information posted. In any of these cases, whether staff deems that the behavior has crossed the line into cyber-stalking, or the "stalked" party complains to staff about the alleged behavior, staff will take the necessary steps to make it stop. Please avoid becoming involved in this type of conduct.

Hope this help and good luck.
Keep records of his texts and emails. If you feel like your in danger make a report atleast for a pfa. And if he's a member report it to a mod as previously stayed. It may be harmless obsession but you can never be to careful
First off DO NOT post any of his text, pm's or email anywhere in the open forums,
but do send any of ECCIE pm's that prove what you are saying to mods Adeptus32, modda or email them to kansas@eccie.net.

It sounds to me like a clear violation of this guideline...
#17 - "Cyber Stalking" is a term that refers to the act of following another member around online. This may include persistent PMing of the other party, repeated ISOs about the other party, or excessive bumping of reviews or posting in threads about the other individual, whether it be positive or negative information posted. In any of these cases, whether staff deems that the behavior has crossed the line into cyber-stalking, or the "stalked" party complains to staff about the alleged behavior, staff will take the necessary steps to make it stop. Please avoid becoming involved in this type of conduct.

Hope this help and good luck. Originally Posted by ElamEno
+1
Good luck girl!
Xoxo,
Lindsay
Starry69's Avatar
Reporting him to the mods might get him kicked off of ECCIE, but he could probably watch what's happening here as a visitor. That would be difficult to stop.

As VK says, posting in the powder room would probably be a great place to get some really good advice from some smart and experienced ladies.

Ultimately I expect you will need to see a lawyer or perhaps the police for a restraining order.

I'd be honest with the lawyer about your profession, but maybe not so honest with the cops!

Good luck, I hope this is resolved quickly!
EmilyEzzell's Avatar
First off DO NOT post any of his text, pm's or email anywhere in the open forums,
but do send any of ECCIE pm's that prove what you are saying to mods Adeptus32, modda or email them to kansas@eccie.net.

It sounds to me like a clear violation of this guideline...
#17 - "Cyber Stalking" is a term that refers to the act of following another member around online. This may include persistent PMing of the other party, repeated ISOs about the other party, or excessive bumping of reviews or posting in threads about the other individual, whether it be positive or negative information posted. In any of these cases, whether staff deems that the behavior has crossed the line into cyber-stalking, or the "stalked" party complains to staff about the alleged behavior, staff will take the necessary steps to make it stop. Please avoid becoming involved in this type of conduct.

Hope this help and good luck. Originally Posted by ElamEno
Hi other EE
It appears this gent is smart enough to not do it through eccie pm. She said it is through email and text. I doubt Eccie can do anything unless he does it on Eccie.

200-500 emails and text a day is WAY over the top. Letting you know where you have been and what you are wearing is a major heads up for you. He is doing you a favor by showing his cards. Now you are aware of his obsession. He is not keeping it a secret. Now you Definitely know you need to protect yourself.

BlazingSummer, Please consider letting your provider friends know his handle and other information you have on him. Just in case something happens to you.

In the meantime, be extra vigilant in your screening. Don't let this guy slip through the cracks. You have posted this thread so any new gents wanting to see you will hopefully understand your extra screening. As vkmaster said, ignore him. Don't respond to him. He wants to get a reaction out of you. He wants you to fear him otherwise he would have silently observed you.

This will change who you are as a person and I'm so sorry.
A couple of texts and emails a day for an extended period is over the top in this type of relationship. 200-500 is a borderline psychotic disorder and should be taken seriously.
200-500 is a borderline psychotic disorder and should be taken seriously. Originally Posted by oktome
Nothing borderline about it.
offshoredrilling's Avatar
errrr marry him, take him for all, and give him a honey-do-list. it will all stop then

edit: on 2nd thought give him a honey-do-list, then take him for all he is worth
the first one I gave is so mmmm old school LOL