Providers ideas on clients using you as references

Okay I ask this question to the providers: Does it matter to you if a client uses you as a reference?

I ask this because a client used someone as a reference I contacted them and they say they have never seen them. But I check to see who he has left reviews for and I know most of the people he has reviewed, and he also had left a review for the person who he used as a reference.

I know clients have used me as a reference and I have had no problem with it I'm wondering what this providers problem was.

This question is for the gents: How do you feel when a provider doesnt want to verify you? I know when I told the guy that the provider said he didnt know him he seemed a little hurt.

Whats everyones outlook on this?
~Ze~'s Avatar
  • ~Ze~
  • 11-18-2010, 07:04 AM
Send a message back to her with the link to the review he did of her.. and ask again.

If she won't cooperate, let him know "one of his references is being difficult" and ask for another.
Send a message back to her with the link to the review he did of her.. and ask again.

If she won't cooperate, let him know "one of his references is being difficult" and ask for another. Originally Posted by ~Ze~
I've verified him with another provider so I'm not worried about her. I just dont see the problem of lieing about something silly.
awl4knot's Avatar
A hobbyist should always ask permission to use a provider as a reference. He should also ask how she prefers to receive the request, i.e. phone, email or pm.

A hobbyist should give the reference a heads up that she may receive a request. He should be sure to give some details to help jog her memory. Although each hobbyist is special in his own little way, encounters tend to blur after a bit.

Likewise, when giving reference sources, the hobbyist should provide those same details so the reference request will resonate when received.

The sad reality is that some providers are poor performers in this area, even though they demand references. This lack of consideration understandably causes friction.
gimme_that's Avatar
But I check to see who he has left reviews for....he also had left a review for the person who he used as a reference. Not totally a safe option, but if his review dates coincide with his p411 oks it might not require a reference on rare occasions. I bypassed having to wait on ref checks a lot when I wrote reviews more regularly to match the ok's.

I know clients have used me as a reference and I have had no problem with it I'm wondering what this providers problem was. They may legitamately forget them. But they also may be sore or jealous the hobbyist didnt call then back instead, it happens. Some areas are competitive like that Originally Posted by Memory757
...
... Originally Posted by gimme_that
Yea I had thought they may have just forgot but then the client described her to a "t" and even said he asked her about me during their session.
eccietime's Avatar
With the new tab, reviews, you can see all his or her reviews on their profile. Great new addition. Usually has phone numbers of providers on the review.



Cpalmson's Avatar
One provider that wanted references asked me to provide a unique detail of my date with another provider (the reference). That way the girl I wanted to see would have a unique piece of information in order to jog the memory of the lady who was my reference. I thought that was a neat idea. For the life of me, I don't see how you gals can keep track of all the clients you have seen without some point of reference to make you remember.
I have also had this problem before, where the provider refuses or just says " I haven't seen him". I think the ladies should all be helpful to one another, we need
to try to make the hobby safer for one another and this is part of it!
I don't post many comments on this board, but this subject is a sore one for me. Some providers feel like the clients belong to them and the clients should not
see anyone else.... THIS IS A HOBBY YOUR NOT REPLACING HIS WIFE. WE DO NOT OWN THESE GENTLEMEN!!! Therefore, ladies you know who you are out there, please
be reference friendly. This will actually get you further with your clients.
Lea Madisson's Avatar
A hobbyist should always ask permission to use a provider as a reference. He should also ask how she prefers to receive the request, i.e. phone, email or pm.

A hobbyist should give the reference a heads up that she may receive a request. He should be sure to give some details to help jog her memory. Although each hobbyist is special in his own little way, encounters tend to blur after a bit.

Likewise, when giving reference sources, the hobbyist should provide those same details so the reference request will resonate when received.

The sad reality is that some providers are poor performers in this area, even though they demand references. This lack of consideration understandably causes friction. Originally Posted by awl4knot
You are spot on, dear sir!!

Smooch!

Lea
I have no problem if a provider or hobbyist uses me as a reference in fact I have a BFE up north that I asked another hobbyist for suggestions for him...which i passed on to him and there a few reasons a person would say they don't know someone is they either really didn't see them, or they forgot and to forget someone is just not the way to do this....that just shows what type of provider you are...they get offended and think the man is theirs...etc.....i saw someone who reviewed someone and the provider wrote a comment "i never saw this person" i asked about it and the answer I dot made sense since I know the provider and what type she is...
I have also had this problem before, where the provider refuses or just says " I haven't seen him". I think the ladies should all be helpful to one another, we need
to try to make the hobby safer for one another and this is part of it!
I don't post many comments on this board, but this subject is a sore one for me. Some providers feel like the clients belong to them and the clients should not
see anyone else.... THIS IS A HOBBY YOUR NOT REPLACING HIS WIFE. WE DO NOT OWN THESE GENTLEMEN!!! Therefore, ladies you know who you are out there, please
be reference friendly. This will actually get you further with your clients. Originally Posted by Lesa Tyler
I agree they should be reference friendly. I know I dont have a problem giving a provider and okay on a client. Ithink that the best wasy to verify a client actually.
BadWolf's Avatar
I use p411 for my scheduling. Likewise I also provide my eccie handle to the lady when I request screening pre-appt...this way she can see my provider OK's on p411, and see my reviews and other posts. Post appointment the provider either gives me an OK that day, or I will request one from her the following day. Very nice and tidy process
I second what Lea said to you. That's perfection.
THIS IS A HOBBY YOUR NOT REPLACING HIS WIFE. WE DO NOT OWN THESE GENTLEMEN!!! Therefore, ladies you know who you are out there, please
be reference friendly. This will actually get you further with your clients. Originally Posted by Lesa Tyler
I agree 100%. I have no problem giving a reference for a gentleman I know. I don't get offended when I have a provider contact me asking me for this info. It is a good Idea to get in touch with us(providers) to let us know you are having someone contact us b/c I have had a wife try before but she was way too obvious & I never saw the guy. The only way I will refuse to give references is to providers that do not give them back! OH and I did have 2 fake reviews on me several yrs back. On boards like b doggie and ter and e.com(not anymore) if they wrote reviews they got some free time or something like that... never seen them! so a review says nothing for me! p411 okays are good though!!